For those wondering about the undisclosed location where Barack Obama is currently hiding, I am about to blow his cover. I hope this does not prompt a Secret Service visit.
Barack Obama is on the set of Jeopardy.
He is the computer that is beating the daylights out of the human contestants.
I cannot believe he has been hiding in plain sight all this time, but the evidence is overwhelming.
The Jeopardy supercomputer is a cold clinical machine with no evident human emotions or empathy.
Barack Obama is a cold clinical machine with no evident human emotions or empathy.
The computer speaks in a programmed voice that requires inputs being fed into it in the form of data source codes.
Barack Obama speaks in a programmed voice that requires inputs being fed into it in the form of multiple teleprompters.
The computer programmers brag that it knows virtually everything.
Barack Obama pr whoever programs him brags that he knows virtually everything.
The computer can memorize facts but cannot function in the real world without programmers telling it what to do.
Barack Obama has memorized many facts but cannot function in the real world without programmers David Axelrod and others telling him what to do.
The computer operates based on information gleamed from reams of paper containing historical data.
Barack Obama operates based on information gleamed from reams of paper containing polling data.
Ok, enough fun. With all due respect to the new host of Jeopardy, having Jeopardy without Alex Trebek (or even Will Ferrell) is like having the White House without George W. Bush. The 2011 board game version is just a shallow imitation.
So at the risk of angering those sworn to keep Mr. Obama hidden, it is time to get him back to Washington to do some actual real work.
He has never figured out balance. When the issue is inconsequential nonsense that is none of his business, he speaks early, often, and repeatedly. Yet on topics that actually matter, he is stone cold silent. Well he is always stone cold, but the silence is disconcerting.
When a police officer who happens to be Caucasian properly detains an arrogant gasbag college professor (redundant, I know) who happens to be black, Mr. Obama has a predetermined and wrong opinion.
He waxes poetic about high speed rail and greeniac utopia scenarios, praying for the day when Mr. Spacely promotes George Jetson to Vice President of the Green Division at Spacely Sprockets (currently being badly run by Jeffrey Immelt at General Electric).
Unfortunately the leader of America has Jetsons dreams while operating with Flintstones skills. All the rubbing of his feet on the ground will not power the Chevy Volt monstrosity that he foisted on America to become more relevant or less ghastly.
Yet his loud support of total fluff, while making him useless, is not harmful. His refusal to speak up as the world burns is a total lack of leadership.
Iran is deliberately trying to provoke a war with Israel. Mr. Obama has nothing to say.
Teachers are striking in Wisconsin. Ronald Reagan quickly fired air traffic controllers. Barack Obama would rather talk about the Packers than the parasites. Again, he has no comments.
Barack Obama spoke for an hour as fifteen people received the Medal of Freedom. Yet worldwide chaos from Egypt to Jordan to Tunisia to Bahrain to Yemen to Iran is met with silence.
Mr. Obama’s defenders will insist that he really does care. He is just so much smarter than everybody else that he is quietly huddled with his advisers monitoring things very closely.
That is called watching. I do it when I turn on the television. The President does not get paid $400,000 a year to watch the news and read the paper. He gets paid to actually do things.
Like the Jeopardy supercomputer, Barack Obama is comfortable in his element and completely lost out of it. If water were doused on the machine, it would develop a short circuit and be rendered worthless. The same is probably true if water was poured on the Jeopardy computer.
President Obama can do his best imitation of the love child of Carmen San Diego and Waldo, but at some point he needs to get over the presidential equivalent of a mid-life crisis and find himself.
Does anybody think Ronald Reagan would hide in a situation like this? Would George W. Bush pull the disappearing act? Would Rudy Giuliani waste time while carnage all around gets ignored?
Maybe Barack Obama is happy with what is happening in the world. After all, from Wisconsin to Yemen, it seems like the world has been taken hostage by community organizers.
Perhaps we should just let Chris Christie handle things. If he is busy, I will volunteer. In Yemen, we should support the people and hope the leadership gets overthrown. In Wisconsin thee should be a government crackdown until order is restored.
Even those disagreeing with these stands will notice that at least I have taken them.
What is Mr. Obama focusing on now? Perhaps he wants to give high speed rail to Egyptians rather than the presidential leadership from the head of America that they are begging for.
For once, Mr. Obama needs to figure out when to stay silent and when to speak.
There will be plenty of time in 2012 for him to be quiet when he is spouting more nonsensical platitudes that may be the same ones from 2008. Perhaps that is his environmental commitment to recycling.
Yet now is a time for him to speak up.
The world is burning. People need to know where President Obama stands.
He is not expected to solve every problem, despite his 2008 promises to part the heavens.
He is expected to at least show that he cares an ounce, and that he understands the depths of the problems people face.
In 2008 it was “We are the ones we have been waiting for.”
In 2011, we are waiting for him to have the courage for once to show up when it matters.
He may not be a computer, but he is far from super.
The only Jeopardy is the state of the world as he dithers.
eric
Lets not get carried away, Watson is far smarter than anything
we could hope for with our President.
Obama is playing it cute, by his programmed responses to just
about every issue.
Even the media falls for it, now claiming he has moved to the middle,
especially since he has embraced the Chambers of Commerce,
and signed the SALT Treaty.
Woooo, each country (US/Russia) will only have 1500 nuke missiles.
But are they Hiroshima type ( 15,000 tones) or 1megaton ( 1m tons )
or H-Bombs that can take out NYCity? And what about the tactical weapons?
BTW, Israel has 200-400 1megaton missiles. That should
give Hamas/Hez/Iran, something to think about.
Hey Obama how come no response to Hezbollah threatening
ti invade Northern Israel in the even of war. Thats not nice.
As Bibi responded, the IDF might have something to say about
that.
Obama for once, criticised Iran for using brutal tactics to
suppress the protests there. Too little too late guy.
In Egypt, the juy is still out. What if the Brotherhood becomes
a party and takes over the government, a la Lebanon? Then what?
Will Obama warn Egypt not to send its 10,000 tanks to the Negev?
But, give him some credit. He told Abbas that he would veto
any UNSC resolution making Israeli settlements per se illegal.
Abbas has called an ’emergency” meeting of the Fatah and PLO.
Obama correctly appreciatges that given the M.E., direct talks
between sides is best..not extortion.
After all, why is Israel in the West Bank (not in the Strip). Its caus
Jordan attacked in 1967, and lost.
Abbas is now also demanding that the Old City be under
Palestinian control and sovereignty, including the Armenian
quarter. Are you listening Armenians?
Frankly, me thinks Watson would do a better job than Obama.
Oh, before I forget, where are you Obama vis a vie the protests
in Wisconsin? U see, their unions are livid over the govs new policy
regarding unions, pensions and collective bargaining (other states
are likely to follow). Unions members vote for the Democratic party generally. Obama got their vote.
Okay, Obama, show your mettle…please.
“When a police officer who happens to be Caucasian properly detains an arrogant gasbag college professor (redundant, I know) who happens to be black, Mr. Obama has a predetermined and wrong opinion.”
Obama was wrong to jump into that fray at all, but he didn’t do it because Gates “happens to be black,” a Rush Limbauggh sort of comment that should be beneath you, but because Gates was a friend of his. There’s a huge difference, and though it may mitigate Obama’s mistake, it still was a mistake. But it was NOT personally racial on Obama’s part. That’s just stupid. On the other hand, Obama probably was right, though he should have stayed out of it, recused himself so to speak, because Gates is a friend of his. You guys are utter hypocrites in this matter, as the Police State was what was wrong with what happened. People should never be arrested for trying to enter their own homes while being rude. But, as most of you “conservatives” are really just Police State authoritarians, it doesn’t surprise me that none of that bothered you. You guys worship armed authority.
Obama is handling the Middle Eastern uprisings very well – quietly, statesman-like, not like a frothing lunatic. The people over there are ot calling for our intervention. They want this for themselves. This isn’t about us. If anything, they’re being kind to us – we’re the ones who support these sleazy aristocracies and juntas. I don;t recall you cons ever complaining about that. And that once again proves that you are simply attacking Obama for the sake of it and not for any real criticism.
JMJ
“eople should never be arrested for trying to enter their own homes while being rude. ”
That was never the case.
The idiot was non compliant in proving he actually lived there and is a historical race baiter.
Dont let the facts get in the way.
Eric couldnt be more right.
The most volatile region in the world is on the brink of disaster that could prove disastrous for everyone and all Barry can do is play the ignorant role every moonbat has been handed that” these folks just want democracy” while he defends the idiots in Madison likening themselves to Egyptians and their governor to Hitler. Unfreakinbelievable.
Nothing could be further from the truth in a non secular society(s) where a majority of the populations are in cahoots, sympathetic, or passively aggressive in dealing with their radical asshats.
“if anything they’re being kind to us”????
Whatever you’re smoking…stop now !!!
our nations reporters are lined up at Middle Eastern emergency wards and getting raped you loon !
Micky, if the same thing happened you, you’d have a different opinion. We live in a Police State where we have to prove ourselves to authority to enter our own home. The police could easily have checked up on the matter. You’d have to be acting “stupidly” to do otherwise. It was stupid.
Eric is wrong on one big count – the people of the Middle East do NOT need American intervention right now. Eric is a neocon who believes in a strong and proactive US military presense in the Middle East. He believes we should work to make the Middle East into a confederation of republican states. He also belives we should continue to prop up monarchies in the Middle East. I see a huge disconnect. Most US Republicans, especially the leadership, share his point of view. He has his point. I disagree. What do you think?
JMJ
“Micky, if the same thing happened you, you’d have a different opinion. ”
Thanks, but I’ve dealt with the cops enough to know my opinion without you deciding it for me.
“he people of the Middle East do NOT need American intervention right now. ”
Democracy to these morons means being able to chose from more than one theological dictator instead of just one.
Freedom to them is a totally different concept as opposed to ours.
Trust me, there will be no Jews or Christians on any of these tumultuous countries ballots.
So, are you suggesting we allow a multi factioned/multi state caliphate to militarize and destroy Israel and eventually America ?
And please, don’t saying I’m being a traditional paranoid hawkish con.
These desires are popular amongst the general Muslim population.
I’ve been screaming from rooftops about the Brotherhood for years now only to have people like you tell me not to sweat it because they’re banned from Egypt bla bla bla (except when Barrys giving a speech in Cairo) and here they are now, the strongest opposition force saying “get ready for war with Israel”
And, you think we dont need American intervention ?
get real bro