I was going to call in gay yesterday, but I was out of days off. So instead I came in straight and earned my paycheck. I would like to think that if I was gay, I would have still gone to work and honored my responsibilities.
For those who were lucky enough to not know, the gay community declared December 10th to be “Gay Day.”
This is not to be confused with “Dre Day,” the Gangsta Rap album by Dr. Dre that launched Snoop Doggy Dogg on the way to starizzledom (or as the we say in the mother tongue, stardom).
Gay Day is the next angry protest against California Proposition 8, which bans gay marriage.
Gay Americans vowed to skip work today, and “call in gay.” This would be the equivalent of “calling in sick.”
This is ironic since many anti-gay people say that gay people are sick, and gay people have argued that they are normal and healthy. Therefore, adopting an approach of “I am gay, I am sick,” is about as intelligent a marketing ploy as Chevrolet marketing the Chevy Nova in Mexico, unaware that “Nova” means “doesn’t go.” At least Chevrolet was being truthful. Gay Americans are not sick, and therefore lying by claiming they are. Also, calling in sick is quite unethical, but that is for another time and place in case my boss reads my blog.
So did “Calling in Gay” revolutionize America? Did the economy notice? Is orange the new blue?
In order, no, no, and I have no idea what I just said. I am not a fashionista. I am your stereotypical unkempt straight guy with jeans and sneakers.
So why did gay day fail?
The reasons that gay day fell flat is actually a successful, optimistic reason for all Americans.
Dear gay America…listen to me closely…there is a word to describe you…
Gay people…I am officially declaring you…
(Grabbing a bullhorn): NORMAL!
That is right. You are normal. You are not special. You are boring. You are generic. You are “been there, done that.” Being gay is soooooooooo 2007 the same way that being black was all the rage in 2006. I hope I live long enough for everybody to be Jewish Republicans, but I will not hold my breath.
The reason why I am tired of listening to gay people is because I am tired of listening to everybody. My father’s favorite holiday was “Shut the hell up and go to work” day. It crosses all of the human strata, and everybody should try it at some point in their lives. Many people feel I should shut up. They do not read my blog. I survive.
For boycotts to work, there has to be a special skill set.
For instance, police officers have been known to have massive sick days that are know as a “Blue Flu.” The Blue Flu has a chance of succeeding because being a police officer requires a certain skill set. Jokes about donuts aside, police officers do things that many of us are not qualified to do.
Being homosexual is not a skill set. It is a lifestyle.
Most people are not pro or anti-gay. We are pro-productivity.
I don’t care who my CPA sleeps with. I just want my taxes done right. My oil change was done by a guy at Jiffy Lube. Now as much as I am tempted to make an infantile remark on how I do not like getting a Jiffy Lube because I prefer she take her time, the bottom line is when I bring my car in I just want my oil changed.
Gay Americans are fighting for the right to have gay marriage become the law of the land.
I personally stay far out of the culture wars. My attitude towards gay people has always been, “Be gay, but don’t raise my taxes or fly a plane into the towers.” Coincidentally, that is my attitude towards the heterosexual community as well.
The issue that the gay community must accept is that any movement lives or dies by the number of disinterested moderates it persuades. The Civil Rights movement needed white moderates. Dr. King understood this. The Jewish community needs support of Christians.
There are not enough gay people in America to influence the law on their own. They need straight people to show solidarity. They need people like me. I am a moderate on gay issues. I can be persuaded. Yet what I really despise more than many things in this world is traffic congestion.
I love President Bush, but I get mad even at him when his motorcade blocks traffic. I live near a Federal building, and every week it is something different. One day it is “Anti-animal rights activists and Feline eugenics.” The next day it is “Persians and Global Shawarming.” The day after brings “Lesbian Vegans for Libya.” The other day a group of protesters wanted to hang Luke Perry for breaking up with Shannon Doherty on “Beverly Hills, 90210.” A counter protest came about with the group chanting, “No Noose Lukes.”
Americans are a tolerant bunch. We just like order. We dislike chaos. Disrupting traffic, or skipping work, are bad approaches.
This is not about the merits of the gay marriage issue. It is about tactics and strategy.
At best, boycotting work will have no effect. The gay receptionist can be replaced by the straight receptionist. Temp agencies have tons of workers looking for assignments. With the economy the way it is today, slacking off from work is unwise. If the boss fires any of these people, it will not be because they are gay, but because they disrupted the workplace.
At worst, such tactics lead to a backlash.
Americans are reasonable people. We are like data. 99.7% of us fit within 3 standard deviations of normalcy. Beyond those parameters are the extremes, which include yelling “We’re here, we’re queer” at innocent bystanders to yelling anti-gay slurs, or God forbid, physical violence such as what happened to Matthew Shephard.
Yet most Americans do not see the struggle for gay marriage to be a struggle for gay rights. This is not Selma, Alabama. Gay people are not having fire hoses turned on them.
This is not the Holocaust. They are not being sent to concentration camps, unless one considers wealthy enclaves in San Francisco and West Hollywood to be punishment. While not all gay people are wealthy, many of them are financially successful. They are getting high paying jobs somewhere. This is not because they are gay, but because they have marketable skills as all people do. Again, it is another example of being less different than some think. They are the same.
The bad news for America is that Gay Day was a flop. What the gay community called Gay Day, I referred to by its given name…Wednesday. At least nobody made a comment about why they chose “hump day.”
(At the risk of a completely irrelevant tangent, “Law and Order” just came on. A gay guy was killed. I am guaranteeing that a straight person did it. Law and Order has a clear political agenda.)
A tree fell in the forest, and it may or may not have been gay. It made not a sound.
Gay people should be happy about this. Most Americans did not even know about Gay Day. We did not bash gays. We did something that we consider better and they might consider worse. We shrugged our shoulders.
(Second and last irrelevant tangent: “Law and Order” just ended. Naturally, a gay man was wrongly convicted, and the actual murderer was a heterosexual hard charging business executive. This show is as predictable as it is politically disgraceful. In real life, corporate executives do not go around committing murders, and poor downtrodden people accused of things actually did it.)
If gay people want to be accepted the way everybody else is, they should do what everybody else does. They should fight the good fight, pursue the noble struggle, but avoid causing moderates to move away from them.
They need to do what I and many others are forced to do. They need to celebrate “Shut the Hell up and go to work” Day.
We all do.
eric
I agree with Eric. I say let’s throw out our entire history and just surrender ourselves back to the British Crown. Let’s all just “shut up and go to work” and maintain the status quo forever and ever. Let’s never change. Let’s just keep doing the same things over and over again until the end of time, or until we just get so bored with it we all just commit suicide en masse.
Great idea!
JMJ
” Let’s just keep doing the same things over and over again until the end of time, ”
You mean like trying to run the country under a socialist method ?
Or bailing out failure ?
Or re electing corrupt officials ?
Why dont they try and shoot for a week ?
Or better yet, lets have a “call in Hetero day”.
maybe someone would pay attention to the folks that really make this country tick.
The ones who are “REALLY GETTING SCREWED” as we have to cough up endless amounts of money for business that doesnt deserve it.
Or what would happen if we had day without married couples ? Or just a day without single moms or dads who have to make ends meet just so that kids can eat.
The sad thing is that anyone in that position of “REAL” hardship would and could not afford the luxury of drawing “well” deserved attention.
IMO we are the ones who are truly getting the shaft these days as a majority who are being victimized by Washingtons persistant abuse of tax payer funds in light of the recent economy , bail outs etc…
And these whining little b*tches who have all the rights of any married couple are making a slectacle of themselves because they cant have a certain title.
Screw Frisco, I hope the backlash from this is enough to make these schmucks look worse than they did after their recent antics.
Well, I havent cut my hair in 15 years and I dont need my interior redecorated so I’m not gonna sweat it.
I, for one, have no intention of “shutting up.” Gay bashing is a billion dollar a year industry. Dobson, Perkins and Wildmon maintain expensive homes and cars at the expense of gay people. In fact:
http://www.tips-q.com/content/essential-activism
Micky, this is a time when the chickens of a one-party GOP rule have come home to roost. Your wonderful party and it’s conservative ideology has left this country in tatters. Industry upon idrustry, sector upon sector are all failing. Unemployment and joblessness are higher than they’ve been in decades. The debt and deficits are historically high. So, what do you cons do? Why, talk about something else, of course! God, gays and guns forever!
Pathetic.
JMJ
Jersey.
Like opinions we all have one body part in common.
Sometimes people like you have nothing but opinions.
With nothing ever to back it up besides bunched up panties.
Speaking of which.
What does any of that have to do with people who have been heard well enough by now and wont sit down and shut up already ?
Jersey.
Like opinions we all have one body part in common.
Sometimes people like you have nothing but opinions.
With nothing ever to back it up besides bunched up panties.
Speaking of which.
What does any of that have to do with people who have been heard well enough by now and wont sit down and shut up already ?
Micky,
Say whatever you want, but when you have to ask me a question like, “What does any of that have to do with people who have been heard well enough by now and wont sit down and shut up already?,” I take it with a grain of salt. My point couldn’t be any simpler: The cons have completely and toally failed our nation, once again, and so now all you can do is divert attention to gays and such, because you have nothing else to offer.
JMJ
“and so now all you can do is divert attention to gays and such, because you have nothing else to offer.”
Excuse me ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
If I’m correct I believe its the left and the gays that are out in force raising holy hell drawing attention to themselves by making holidays for themselves, terrorizing churches, assaulting old lady’s and blocking traffic.
Go get yer head re attached.
You guys lost by the will of the majority.
Not one church or one section of our society but by a vote in one of the most diverse liberal democratic states in our country.
As a democrat, “a proponent of democracy, rule of the people or rule by many” you would think that the definition of your own party would apply in this case and you would respect the majority.
But no !
When it doesn’t suit you, even the cornerstone that makes your party what it is, isn’t good enough.
Since the vote the right has remained pretty silent on the issue and its been gays on the front pages everyday since the vote.
So please, wise up an realize that we are not the ones diverting attention to the issue as it is the gays who have been making a spectacle of themselves.
WE on the right did not ask them to do all the stupid things they have been doing since they lost.
The failure of the economy sits with the left and the housing bubble it created “Ala Carter and Clinton” along with a side order of CRA.
I of course have shown you the stats on this but of course like the gays you think if you just keep kicking and screaming the same thing all over the place one day your dream will come true.
Here we are again, cleaning up after the left due to its incredible dereliction of duty.
That’s why were in Afghanistan, that’s why were in Iraq,and that’s why were in this predicament today.
Clinton neglected to take care of the crap Carter started that really put radical Islam in fifth gear.
Clinton failed to deal with Saddam.
Clinton failed to deal with a threat that had attacked us 4 times on his watch and he did nothing so that they could go about their business and plan 911.
Carter gave us ethanol by throwing into our market with paranoid liberal fear mongering.
So far, if you.ve noticed, everyone is saying that this is the worst its been “SINCE” the 70’s, Carters regime.
They are not saying its “AS BAD”
So, I guess if you really want to see failure that comes close to complete go back in time about 35 years. when on a relative scale employment was double what it is today, national relations and security was as bad as it ever got, and gas compared to today’s market was around 15.00 a gallon and you had to wait in line every other day.
And really, grow up and stop with the overstated extreme irrational and false dramatizations.
Had the cons completely and totally failed we would not be here.
This country has been thru far far worse and you call this a complete failure ?
Then what was the depression in the 30’s ?
As far as who has what to offer goes it looks like almost everything Obama offered up during his campaign is coming off the table.
Things will take more than one term to achieve, were not leaving Iraq when he said we were, Gitmo will not close anytime soon, and he’s going to tax even the ones he said he wouldn’t.
Since he cant pull out of Iraq he has no way to pay for all the health insurance and programs he promised, he cant explain where any of the money he says he’s going to spend will come from and on and on and on.
Talk to me about offerings in a few months while your rump has still been offered up to you in one piece thanks to no one else but the right.
All the above issues with Clinton and Carter have been debated by you and I once before and you lost because all you had was your opinion up against my reputable congressional transcripts and documents and factual history.
You cannot and never have been able to prove any of your claims or assertions.
I’m not saying I’m always right, far from it.
But if I seem like I always am, its because my dad taught me one very important thing.
That was to never ever open yer yap unless you could back it up.
So, now, answer my question.
What does any of the failures you perceive the right is guilty of have to do with a flaming bunch of idiots who don’t know what the word “NO” means ?
Ok, here’s my two cents on the issue. I’m basically right on par with what Eric thinks, maybe with a twist.
I think gay’s are messing up their chance for society to accept their lifestyle. Honestly speaking I really don’t care what they do behind doors. But when they start disrupting things that’s when I begin to care because they’re affecting me.
Below are a few examples of doing the wrong thing and even though it’s a small percentage of gays doing this NEWS FLASH they’re ruining it for the rest.
1. Recently a gay man sued eHarmony for the right to look for a partner and won. This forced eHarmony to change their business model despite the fact that the founder of eHarmony based his business on conservative Christian principles. eHarmony rejects millions of heteros yearly based on a test they do, do they have any legal recourse? Have any of them bothered to make a stink? No, they took their business SOMEWHERE ELSE. There’s other sites that specialize in the gay dating nich. GO THERE instead of forcing a site to change the way they work. Good job there with an “Where here, we’re queer, get used to it!” thing.
2. Election day and the few days after election day. Gays gather in front of the Mormon Church to protest stopping traffic and being rather belligerent asking passerby’s whether they supported or went against prop 8 and if a person stood up for themselves and said they supported it they were attacked. Guys, it’s a nonya as to what a person marked on their ballot.
3. Gays found out who gave money to support prop 8 and published a boycott list. That’s fine, but a few crossed the line when some went to a few of those businesses and vandalized them. Way to go, that will win moderates over.
4. Every year there’s a gay pride parade. I don’t have a parade for Jewish pride or even dare I say White pride. Is it necessary? I don’t think so. But every one of those parades has some (or more than a few) gay guys in chaps wagging their ass all over the place. It’s offensive. Do you really want that to become the image that defines how you act? Too late. It’s burned in to the minds of the people you are trying to get acceptance from! Good job!
So you see. Every time you take a step forward. The idiots who behave badly bring you so many steps back. That goes for any group who want acceptance and understanding from a majority who don’t see things the way you do. Try backing off and going at it from a different angle instead of hammering it in that you’re there.
Most people probably don’t know that Matthew Shepard’s murderers have stated that their motive was money and drugs, not Shepard’s sexuality. ( http://abcnews.go.com/2020/Story?id=277685&page=1 ).
There’s a question that has been rolling over in my mind recently, as I’ve been watching the protesters and hearing their complaints – most of them are avid atheists, humanists, and Darwinists. The first two I understand, but how do they reconcile that last one? Just curious.
Eric, Thanks for all of your “bloggins” (is that a word?… Frodo). I particularly enjoyed this one. I can sort of follow you when you say gays are “normal”… I agree with because I view their sin is no greater than any other sin (that we all commit)… it all separates us from God.
By the way, you sort of already have part of your “Jewish Republican” wish. Because, us Christians consider you Jews our big brothers and sisters in the greater family of Yahweh… and, most of us are conservative.
Speaking of promotions, we’d like to promote REV21’s new single release, Hush (a happy song about kids). Yes, is has a little tinge of 80’s Hair Metal, so I hope you enjoy the attached MP3. Folks can get it for 49 cents at: http://www.slingshotrecords.org/slingshot-records/merchandise
MERRY CHRISTMAS!
“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth on him should not perish, but have everlasting life.”