THE TYGRRRR EXPRESS

6 hours of driving, 3 in Southern California and 3 in Idaho, in addition to a few hours on planes, equals a 4am bedtime and a Noon wakeup call.

So here is Firing Squad Friday, where I offer nothing of value, and do that badly.

In Utah a murderer was executed on death row by firing squad. Good. I hope they played a Barbra Streisand record to torture him in his final seconds before pulling the triggers.

On Capitol Hill the CEO of BP faced a different firing squad. I was not bothered by this because the session was totally useless. It was so obvious that Democrats want to shift the debate away from their inability to accomplish anything this legislative session.

In basketball news, the evil empire of basketball won again. I am sick inside. I am not sure if a certain leader of that team made a deal with the devil, or merely is the devil. Either way, I hope the guards in my building had a firing squad of their own prepared in case the mob violence reached my street. I will know if the city burned when I get back.

Ole, ole ole ole…ole…ole.

That concludes my soccer report, sponsored by Oil of Olay.

As for the scores of the games…oh, nobody cares.

I began yesterday speaking at 7am to the Cajon Valley GOP ladies in San Diego. Then I drove from San Diego to Los Angeles, stopping to chat with a San Diego police officer who explained that speed laws are arbitrary numbers, not suggested guidelines or recommendations.

Caught my flight to Idaho, and got to meet another police officer who explained a similar concept. The trees obscure the signs here.

I have the biggest speech of my life tonight, but I can’t talk about it until it happens. Maybe I can, but I am voluntarily keeping this one under wraps.

On the romance front, major announcement tomorrow.

Meanwhile, I was excited this morning about meeting the Jewish community of Idaho. I woke up, walked to my sink, and looked in the mirror. There I was.

Just kidding.

BP CEO Hayward reminds me of Piers Morgan.

Henry Waxboy remains as hideous as ever inside and out.

It could be exhaustion talking, but Arizona Governor Jan Brewer looks kinda hot.

Lastly, I had an adventure in the desert the day before yesterday when I got stranded on the way to Phoenix. Some Mexicans showed up with a canteloupe.

Do not bother to figure that one out. Just go with it.

The idle mind is the devil’s playground, and I am now officially an amusement park. On Monday, hard core politics will return.

This concludes Firing Squad Friday.

As for the guy in Utah, like Chevy Chase reporting on Francisco Franco, the man is still dead.

eric

This entry was posted on Friday, June 18th, 2010 at 1:43 pm and is filed under POLITICS, SPORTS. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.