General Petraeus, Please tell the entire truth

One of the most dishonest acts of blogging is creating sensationalistic headlines offering provocative themes that are completely misleading. I am guilty as charged. Deal with it.

General David Petraeus is very diplomatic, but he will not tell the complete truth when he testifies. He will discuss the surge. He will give his assessment of how the War in Iraq is progressing. He will most likely state that he needs more time. We are making progress, we have a long way to go, but there is cause for cautious optimism. Yet there is one thing he will refuse to say, so I will say it for him.

The Senators with the most hostile questioning of him are not fit to lick his boots.

https://tygrrrrexpress.com/2007/07/unless-your-name-is-general-david-petraeus-your-opinion-on-the-war-is-irrelevant/

There. I said it.

I want to make it clear that what makes America work is that the military is under civilian control. That should never change. At the same time, it would be nice if the civilians questioning him actually knew something, anything, about what they were talking about.

It is one thing for Senators to rail against Alan Greenspan or Ben Bernanke. After all, the blowhards had no power to actually do anything about anything the Federal Reserve Chairman said that they found objectionable. With the military, there is a budget involved, and Congress controls it. It would be helpful if those determining whether General Petraeus gets the time he needs actually had life from the neck up.

Here is how I wish the testimony would go in my fantasy world.

“Senator Clinton, the fact that you are questioning me about how I do my job strains all credulity. It defies belief. At 3am, my men are asleep after a 20 hour day, and the 4 hours we sleep would be easier if you were no longer near that phone. Please take your stories about sniper fire in Bosnia and disappear. I know about sniper fire, and your trips around the globe are safe because of my men.”

I would pray that the general would pause long enough to allow me to get some soda and chips and enjoy the show.

“Senator Obama, you say you stand for change. Change comes through blood, sweat and tears, not platitudes. You have never been to Iraq, and as corrupt and dangerous as Chicago may be, it’s a civilized first world city compared to what Iraq was under Saddam Hussein. You may say I have no right to denigrate Chicago, and I will be happy to stop doing so when you stop denigrating Iraq. Either get on a plane and shake the hands of the men that keep you free enough to mouth vacuous campaign slogans, or sit there and smile so people do not figure out that you know nothing about the issue.”

In my fantasy conference, he would go through the liberals like the decorated trooper he is.

“Senator Boxer, if you are truly against torture, then be quiet, because your shrill voice is torture to me. Stop pretending you care about women’s rights. I am fighting for the right of women in the Middle East to avoid having to wear burkhas against their will. I am freeing women from the bonds of slavery and female circumcision. You know what female circumcision is about. It is why you never smile. Now take your ‘I am woman, hear me roar’ attitude and go fix my dinner. I’ve been in the field all day, that being the battle field. If my dinner isn’t ready by the time I am done speaking, I’ll remind the audience about all the women worldwide that are dying while you prattle on and on about nonsense.”

He would spare none of these miscreants.

“Senator Kennedy, I felt safer in Iraq then I would as a passenger in your car. Senator Byrd, you are the reason many American’s support euthanasia. I would say more but you can’t hear me, and if you could, you wouldn’t understand me. Senator Mikulski, just because you are tough enough to play defense for the Baltimore Ravens doesn’t mean you are qualified to take on Al Sadr.”

He would then knock over the table like an angry coach at halftime.

“Senator Boxer, get a mop and clean this mess up. I clean up messes around the globe for you, it’s time for you to start pulling your weight. Senator Kennedy, you can pull half your weight and make a difference.”

An angry, flustered Boxer would then start babbling about the search for truth. At that point General Petraeus would do his best Colonel Nathan R. Jessup impersonation, yelling “You can’t handle the truth!”

Once the Senators were done crying and insisting that they were not the least relevant people on Earth, General Petraeus would agree with them.

“Of course you’re not the most worthless. The House of Representatives makes you clowns look knowledgeable. I plan to kick their @ss tomorrow with more ferocity than we are kicking Al Queda’s @ss.”

The republicans in the Senate would give him a standing ovation, and ask if he had any closing remarks.

“Senator Boxer, you are not fit to lick my boots, but try and prove me wrong. Here they are. Now take your tongue and get to work. I want them spit shined by 6 hundred hours. Don’t worry if your mouth gets tired. It’s not like you use it for anything valuable anyway. You might learn more if you are too tired to talk.”

I eagerly await the real press conference, although it will contain less fireworks. In terms of the war, General Petraeus will be the most honest man in the room. In terms of what he should say to the liberals sitting in judgment of him, he will be too polite to be completely truthful.

eric

No Responses to “General Petraeus, Please tell the entire truth”

  1. micky2 says:

    Without reading your post I will first say that Levine and Kennedy Pi$$ed me off.
    Now I will read.

  2. TRM says:

    A goddamned circus…
    I am going around trying to link us all up that are posting on this… good one dude…

  3. […] Tygrrrr Express has some wonderful input here… […]

  4. micky2 says:

    I would give just about anything to see Gen. Petraeus get up and walk over to Levine smack him upside the head and say ” What dont you understand about not commiting to a time frame ?” You can try all you want but you;re not going to get me to say that !”
    Grrrr. :-(

  5. David M says:

    The Thunder Run has linked to this post in the – Web Reconnaissance for 04/08/2008 A short recon of what’s out there that might draw your attention, updated throughout the day…so check back often.

  6. Jersey McJones says:

    I watched the first hearing today. So far nothing new or surprising. As usual, too much emphasis on the irrelevent – AQI, Irans’ alleged support of Mahdi (a complete opposite of truth), etc. Some questions bounced around by purvue. The usual. Nothing to see here folks.

    I thank God we have a military at the pleasure of the people and not the other way around. So I’m glad we’re having hearings. And I don’t care about the qualifications of the senators. They were elected, that’s all the qualifications they need. Being from a military background is not the sole perfect qualifier for life – or even war. It is no more or less impressive than being a doctor, jurist, teacher, parent, and yes even a politician. One great politician can save more lives, end more wars, ease more suffering, and avoid war entirely than all the militaries of the world combined. And even in matters of war, the miltary, lacking expertise in many matters peripheral to war, requires assistance from other sectors of the actors public and private sectors. A war is more than just the military engagement – it is all the other matters of at least the two actor states. War, sadly, is more than just those who fight it with their lives.

    This is not to denegrate soldiers, so if anyone infers that, please get a life. This is simply to argue that shooting the messengers on the Hill may make you feel good, but it’s seriously misgiven. Thank God we still have some vestige of civilian oversight of the military. I do not want to live in a Third World cesspit run by a bunch of generals – like every Third World country run by generals. There is more to life – and in war – than just being a general.

    Enjoy the hearings, all. Sometimes they’re quite educational.

    JMJ

  7. micky2 says:

    JMJ;
    “And I don’t care about the qualifications of the senators. They were elected, that’s all the qualifications they need.

    LMAO.
    I was listening to Kennedy and told myself; “Jeez, I’ve never been a politician and I could think of better questions that dont represent an unyeilding display of contempt and moonbattery partisanship. And would instead actually ask questions that get to the heart of the matter without trying to play gotcha.
    And then theres Levin, trying to put words into the generals mouth.
    Some of the crap I heard actually qulifies them to be taken out behind the woodshed.

  8. Jersey McJones says:

    Well luckily, Micky, we don’t live under a military Mickyocracy. You want better senators? So do I. We can only help pick our own.

    JMJ

  9. micky2 says:

    Luckily we will ever have to depend on guys like you to defend our country.
    Supporting the positions we expected them to hold is one thing. Trying to play strategic semantics to get a certain answer is BS !
    Picking them serves little purpose when after they are elected they do an about face and give us all the finger.
    Comprende ?
    Woodshed baby, woodshed.

  10. Brian says:

    What has stricken me both last week with the Fed hearings and then today is the politization of the events…the cheap shots and vile ignorance expressed…mostly by the Dems ( I was a Dem my whole voting life until about 8 months ago…) Senators Kennedy, Clinton and Obama among others really have no place in front of such honorable individuals as Crocker and Petraeus.

    Yes, I am also thankful we don’t live under military rule;’ no doubt…but, thhe military seems a great deal more serious about making the world a better place than a number of our Representatives…

  11. parrothead says:

    Have any congressional hearings ever been about anything other than the political preening of members who spend lots of time pontificating and very little time asking questions. Most of those questions are designed to score political points rather than elicit information. This is true of most members on both sides. They enter these hearings already having positions and agendas none if which will change. So mostly they are a waste of time and money and I really don’t see much point to them,

    Jersey I do applaud the fact that you recognize a lot more than soldiers contribute to the war effort. Let us not forget that DOD itself of an integrated miltary, civilian, and contractor team that all play an important role. In addition to all the other institutions you are implying. But have a hard time with the statement: “One great politician can save more lives, end more wars, ease more suffering, and avoid war entirely than all the militaries of the world combined.” One politician either great or terrible has only a limited effect on anything. It is only in concert with other politicians, corporations, citizens, the military, and every other category you can think of that any politician can accomplish anything.

    Yes it is a good thing we do have civilian oversight of the military. I just don’t think these hearings provide anything to that oversight.

  12. Jersey McJones says:

    I agree, Parrothead – “Yes it is a good thing we do have civilian oversight of the military. I just don’t think these hearings provide anything to that oversight.” But I’m still really glad that I as a citizen had the opportunity to watch them and share them with you guys. I’m glad I have elected representatives at least asking questions, all be they mostly insipid.

    JMJ

    PS: MCCAIN SHOULD PICK HAGEL – Smartest. Pick. Ever. (or like Dole picking Kemp… oh well… never mind.)

  13. Tom Autry says:

    Fact: Some of our Senators are aiding and abetting, boosting the morale of the enemy, and harming the morale of our soldiers.

  14. micky2 says:

    Insipid is not the word.
    Vindictive and malicious and contemptuous. Its all about CMA and votes.
    If they actually gave a rats a$$ besides something other than their own appearance the questionong would be of substance.
    But the left is just using this to push their stupid little partisan agendas.

    “At least asking questions?’
    In this case its like saying ” well I tried” as the whole effort goes to hell in a handbasket.

  15. Bush & Petraeus - LEAD, FOLLOW or GET the (redacted) OUT of the WAY | says:

    […] Uygur: Why is General Petraeus Helping Iran?General Petraeus, Please tell the entire truthGeneral Petraeus: “We Haven’t Turned Any Corners. We Haven’t Seen …General […]

  16. Eagle 6 says:

    Eric, Not sure why you would allow post #15 – although many of us may submit personal opinions or unsubstantiated arguments, ..not sure what the above doodling is… First, the good General isn’t helping Iran. Second, if one’s brain has been zeroed out, I suppose one wouldn’t recognize a corner, and third, what does “Weh Haven’t See…Generer…” mean? The poster is likely a registered voter. Only in America

  17. micky2 says:

    @ Eagle.
    From my experience Eric sometimes leaves these kind of things up just so we can get an example of the idocy and ignorance out there.
    It also looks like #15 tried to leave a ping back or link and it didnt take.

  18. blacktygrrrr says:

    Comment # 15 will be the subject of my entire column tomorrow, which has already been written as of last night. Stay tuned!

    eric :)

  19. Jersey McJones says:

    David Scott is letting Petraeus and Crocker have it good right now.

    Some of the questions, like some of the questioners, are pretty good.

    JMJ

  20. […] Uygur: Why is General Petraeus Helping Iran? General Petraeus, Please tell the entire truth General Petraeus: “We Haven’t Turned Any Corners. We Haven’t Seen … General Petraeus Iraq […]

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