THE TYGRRRR EXPRESS

Although the Tygrrrr Express is primarily a political blog during the week, politics took a holiday as 2009 came to a close and 2010 entered.

The year ended with me giving my 2010 Tygrrrr Express State of the Blog Address. The cheers and standing ovations were deafening, as I announced that the state of the Tygrrrr Express is strong.

On New Year’s Day the lads and I had a “guys day in.” It is like a guys night out, except less manly. We all took a nap during the Rose Bowl, and one of the guys chucked masculinity to the winds by wearing a “snuggie” during the game. No, it was not me.

The weekend brought plenty of football, including Week 17 of the 2009 NFL Season.

Next week is my birthday, and I have plenty of speeches in 2010.

Yet this is mainly a political blog, which leaves one question as the first work day of 2010 begins.

Now what?

I mean surely I am going to start the year with something to enthrall you all.

Yeah right. You should have lowered your expectations a couple of years ago.

I could immediately start the first of a billion columns about the 2010 congressional elections.

No.

I could immediately start the first of two billion columns about the 2012 presidential election.

Double no. For the love of all things holy, no.

Tomorrow I will explain why the 2012 nomination is already decided, and then refuse to discuss 2012 until well after the 2010 elections.

Surely I could discuss the health care bill. I mean I could actually bore myself to sleep. When there is an actual bill up for a vote that will either pass or fail, I will wake up.

There is the Climategate scandal. First of all I hate putting the word gate onto every scandal. Call that hategate. Secondly the story will not matter unless something comes out of it, such as a complete shift in public opinion. That may be happening, but it is too soon to tell.

I could talk about the Christmas bombing attempt to blow up an American airliner. After all, that was very serious. Because the plane did not blow up, those on the left that love the smell of their own scents will have learned nothing. Telling you all that those on the left love the smell of their own scents offers nothing new. I don’t want an actual attack, but nothing short of that will wake people up.

Rush Limbaugh went to the hospital with chest pains. He is resting comfortably. That is the whole story. God forbid something would have happened, I could have pointed out the vitriol of the leftist blogs jumping up and down in celebration. The ideological bigotry columns will resume when the actual events occur.

Look, analyzing news on Monday is only possible when things actually happen on Sunday.

The Desperate Housewives episode was depressing, but if you did not watch it that is on you. You don’t deserve a recap. Eva Longoria and Terri Hatcher get paid to frolic around in their undies, and they are very good at it. Instead in this episode we saw Ms. Longoria in a flash forward with hair whiter than Barbara Bush. It was frightening.

A pair of basketball players on the Washington Wizards allegedly pulled guns on each other in the locker room. The team used to be known as the Washington Bullets. The name was changed to give the team a  better image. Once again, Washington, DC, is a bastion of morality. I would say more but I don’t care. They could have shot each other and been done with it.

To the best of my knowledge, no clergy person got caught violating an altar boy this calendar year.

Sure, Palesimians are trying to blow up Israelis, but that is not news.

Sure, Iran is trying to blow up the world, but the people in charge don’t care.

Even Bob Herbert of the Jayson Blair Times put aside his anger at Republicans to focus on the New York Jets. I never thought I would live to see him write a column worth reading, but it was a good article discussing his long history as a loyal fan of his team. It will be the only time I ever identify with him.

I could take a positive approach and say that if we bother to get to know people, they may surprise us.

Let’s do that. If he never writes another column of leftist bile, I will never point it out. He and every other media person gets a clean slate from me.

I will even give the President a clean slate for 2010 until he does something that bothers me. The over/under on that is later today, as soon as he starts speaking.

So as I clear out my Jdate and eharmony caches, and find the time to search for a Republican Jewish brunette to frolic with, I will approach things politically as any moderately responsible person would.

I will wait and see.

If that does not produce anything, i can always engage in some public metaphorical navel gazing, which was pretty much this column.

Now what?

2010. Your guess is as good as mine.

eric

This entry was posted on Monday, January 4th, 2010 at 1:54 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.