THE TYGRRRR EXPRESS

My birthday: 51 happy memories upon turning 51

I entered this world 51 years ago today on January 9, 1972. On my 49th birthday, here are 49 happy memories.

1.) Every moment I ever spent with my grandparents. They are gone now, but I had all four of them when I graduated college and three of them when I turned 30. I am blessed.

2.) January 9, 1977 — The Oakland Raiders won the Super Bowl on my fifth birthday. I saw the logo and became a Raider for life.

3.) August 15, 1980 — Smokey and the Bandit II came out. I saw the original and the sequel and became a lifelong fan of the Bandit and the Snowman.

4.) January 22, 1984 — The Raiders won their third Super Bowl. I still remember telling the kids at school the next day one simple message. “Just win baby!”

5.) January 21, 1985 — I had my Bar Mitzvah, the Jewish passage into manhood. My Orthodox Rabbi grandfather led the ceremony.

6.) July 13, 1990 — I watched Bill Murray in “Quick Change” for the first of over 100 times. This movie is true New York, and Murray remains a national hero.

7.) August 26, 1990 — I flew from New York to Los Angeles for college. I immediately fell in love with this city and never left.

8.) September 26, 1990 — I joined the campus radio station and developed my lifelong love of radio.

9.) May 10, 1992 — I wrote my first song. 70 more would follow.

10.) January 9, 1994 — The Raiders won a playoff game over arch rival Denver on my 22nd birthday. We all had a big party to celebrate afterward at 1950s Cafe Ed Debevic’s.

11.) June 14, 1994 — The New York Rangers won the NHL Stanley Cup and ended the 54 year curse.

12.) September 13, 1994 — I passed the Series 7 stockbroker’s exam. At that moment I was now a professional.

13.) June 1, 1997 — I saw my friend doing something on a computer that seemed different. He was in a chat room. It was my first time using the Internet.

14.) July 4, 1999 — My friends and I crashed an Independence Day party on the beach and escaped moments before police busted up the party.

15.) September 23, 1999 — I finally got my driver’s license. I never needed one before.

16.) December 31, 1999 — Ringing in the Millennium in Las Vegas.

17.) March 1, 2000 — I flew from Los Angeles to New Orleans for Mardi Gras 2000. I still have my Calvin and Hobbes t-shirt, “Life is short. Party naked. Mardi Gras 2000.”

18.) February 13, 2003 — I watched the movie “Old School.” I will forever thank Vince Vaughn, Will Ferrell and “The Godfather” Luke Wilson for inspiring me at age 31 to finally start going to Florida for Spring Break. Years of South Beach, Miami revelry ensued at the Clevelander and Ocean’s 10.

19.) March 14, 2003 — I flew to Singapore and Thailand and got to experience five days of beauty in each country. I met the Jewish communities of both nations.

20.) November 4, 2003 — NFL Network was born. Finally, a television channel worth watching existed.

21.) November 2, 2004 — Enjoying the 2004 election with my closest friends.

22.) February 12, 2006 — I flew from Los Angeles to Hawaii. I met the Jewish community of Honolulu and attended my first NFL Pro Bowl. I met ESPN’s Chris Berman.

23.) April 28, 2006 — I flew from Los Angeles to New York and went to Radio City Music Hall. For the first time, I got to attend the NFL Draft and meet a bunch of great football heroes.

24.) August 4, 2006 — I flew from Los Angeles to Ohio and drove to Canton. I visited the Pro Football Hall of Fame, saw the induction ceremony featuring John Madden, and attended the Pro Football Hall of Fame Game.

25.) March 11, 2007 — I Started a blog called the Tygrrrr Express. That column somehow turned into five books and a national speaking career.

26.) September 11, 2007 — On the sixth anniversary of the attacks, I flew from Los Angeles to New York and then drove to Great Adventure in New Jersey. I attended Sean Hannity’s Freedom Concert and saw New York Mayor Rudy Giuliani light up the crowd.

27.) October 17, 2007 — I joined Facebook. Between that and Twitter, I have met many good people, increased book sales, and built my business.

28.) February 2, 2008 — I flew from Los Angeles to Phoenix and attended my first Super Bowl. The New York Giants shocked the previously unbeaten New England Patriots.

29.) March 30, 2008 — My friend adopted a child from Guatemala. On this day “the boy” turned one. Being “Unca Eric” is the best job in the world.

30.) May 13, 2008 — I flew from Los Angeles to Washington, DC. I attended the Republican Jewish Coalition Leadership Conference and met Dr. Charles Krauthammer.

31.) August 6, 2008 — I flew from Los Angeles to Israel and spent a week in the Holy Land.

32.) August 30, 2008 — I flew from Los Angeles to Minneapolis for my first Republican Convention. For a week, friends and I slept in a sports bar. It was like being Norm Peterson from “Cheers.”

33.) April 5, 2009 — My first book “Ideological Bigotry” was published.

34.) September 1, 2009 — I left Wall Street after 15 years and began my career as a full-time professional speaker.

35.) November 11, 2009 — I flew from Los Angeles to Galveston and spoke at the Texas Federation of Republican Women Convention. I made TFRW and other lifelong friends in the Lone Star State.

36.) March 11, 2010 — I flew from Los Angeles to Oklahoma City to speak at the National Federation of Republican Women Spring Conference. That launched me nationally since the NFRW run the world.

37.) May 1, 2011 — In Aiken, South Carolina, I saw the news that Osama bin Laden was killed. That night I told my very best political joke. “Osama bin Laden is now burning underground with 72 Helen Thomases.” It was the bookend to my very first political joke. “Never rely on a Palestinian GPS tracker. I took one wrong turn, ended up at a cemetery, and a sinister voice said, ‘You have reached your final destination!’ I got so angry I threw the thing out the window, which was good because 5 seconds later it exploded.”

38.) February 9, 2013 — I met Vice President Dick Cheney and spoke in front of him at a dinner.

39.) September 25, 2013 — I spoke to a Tea Party group in Hays, Kansas. At that moment, I had officially spoken in all 50 states.

40.) November 4, 2014 — I spoke at an election night party in New Jersey.

41.) March 20, 2015 — After writing four political comedy books, I finished my first religious comedy book “Jewish Lunacy.” This allowed me to move beyond political speaking into religious speaking.

42.) May 12, 2015 — I met President George W. Bush and shook his hand.

43.) November 8, 2016 — Enjoyed a raucous election night party in Raleigh, North Carolina.

44.) Any woman whoever let me play with her yummy bouncies or at least was nice enough to send me pictures of them.

45.) January 9, 2018 — On my 46th birthday, the return of Chucky as Jon Gruden returns to the Black Hole to rejoin the Raiders. Like me, Gruden has unfinished business.

46.) November 9, 2018 — I met Angela Lansbury in Beverly Hills and got my picture taken with her. She remains one of the most talented people in the history of entertainment.

47.) 2019 was the year I branch out beyond books and into t-shirts. I started with 2 or 3 designs in 2017 and 2018. By the end of 2019 I had 49 mostly original t-shirt designs. Now I have over 250 mostly original designs. My best seller remains “Stop judging women by their tops. #BackSidesMatter!”

48.) 2020 was a brutal year for so many people because of a global pandemic. Yet thank God I was healthy and in better financial condition than previous years. On January 9, 2021, I watched the NFL Wildcard playoffs with friends. Normally there would be 2 games as has been the case for the last 30 years. Yet for the first time, there were 3 games, with 3 more to occur on January 10th. I watched football all day and had a great day with people who matter to me. I was besieged with well-wishes from hundreds of people by text, phone call and social media. My birthday evening capped with a special someone. I am blessed as can be to have had such a great birthday.

49.) August 9, 2021 — Rabbi Yaakov Perman of Chabad Leawood, Kansas helped me put on Tefillin. At that moment, I had finally put on Tefillin in all 50 states. 

50.) On February 14, 2022, I achieved the American dream that I thought was forever beyond my reached. I finally bought a home. I own a condo in North Miami, Florida. 

51.) On August 14, 2022, I achieved another dream that I thought would never happen. After a life of bachelorhood, I got married. She is a Republican Jewish brunette. 

I would like to thank my parents for raising me right and Angela Lansbury’s JB Fletcher of “Murder, She Wrote” for catching murderers and making the world safer.

Anything I could possibly wish for has already been granted.

eric @ Tygrrrr Express

The Top 10 Bimbos of 2022

As 2022 prepares to enter the history books, it is time to take a look at the most shallow, vapid people of the year. This list of the Top 10 Bimbos of 2022 has always been controversial because angry leftist feminists (redundant) are incapable of reading the disclaimer. The term “bimbo” is gender neutral. Gender neutral is not the same thing as gender fluid, which is what one puts in their automobile if they self-identify as a car. Gender neutral means bimbos can be male or female. The only qualification is that the person must coast on their style while having zero substance. For years these awards were dedicated to the ultimate bimbos: Former President Barack Obama and singer Katy Perry. Ms. Perry has been less obnoxious in recent years, so she has been replaced in the ultimate bimbo category by her rival Taylor Swift.

Many of you will be surprised that Joe Biden, Kamala Harris and Pete Buttigieg all failed to make the list. They have not stopped being bimbos, but selecting the same people every year makes things boring. Also, there are so many bimbos of their il that I felt it necessary to replace them in the interest of their cherished diversity. Neither Prince Harry or Meghan Markle made the list. They have not stopped being insufferable pompous @sses, but there is plenty of time in the future for them to return to this list. I tried to select people that would probably not make the list again. This is their only chance.

Taylor Swift and Kanye West just barely missed the list. These two became joined at the hip years ago when west crashed swift’s acceptance speech. These people are both narcissists. Swift has a carefully crafted reputation for being a sweetheart. Her facade belies a cold, indifferent woman who spends her life complaining that her relationships keeps failing. Her music is about settling scores, failing to realize that maybe she is the problem. While she was not responsible for the Ticketmaster fiasco, she stayed silent as her fans burned. As for West, he suffers from mental illness. Normally that would get him sympathy points, but his constant rants against Jews is over the line. So is his hanging out with actual Neo-Nazis. Swift and West deserve each other. They could be a self-absorbed super-couple. West would finally have a man and Kanye would have a new marriage to wreck. Yet there were actually 10 people even worse than them.

With that, here are the Top 10 Bimbos of 2022.

10.) Jada Pinkett Smith — Some of you may wonder why her husband Will Smith is not on this list for slapping Chris Rock. What Will did was wrong, but Jada set the whole thing in motion. Rock made a joke, because that is what comedians do. He made fun of her for being bald. Will initially laughed at the joke until he saw that his wife was angry and humorless. Will harmed his career and his reputation to pacify his wife. This is after she spent their entire marriage humiliating him by declaring herself in an open marriage. For using and abusing a good guy and letting him take the fall, she is awful even by low Hollywood standards. She would rank higher on this list except that people in Hollywood are the least important people on earth.

9.) Josh McDaniels — The former Patriots offensive coordinator is considered a genius because he won Super Bowls with Bill Belichick and Tom Brady. He took over a decent Denver Broncos team and drove them into the ground in less than two years. He flaked on taking the Indianapolis Colts job after accepting it. He might be the most hated man in football not named Lane Kiffin. He parlayed his last failure as a head coach into the head coaching job with the Raiders. He took a playoff team and turned it into a losing team. He took a Pro Bowl quarterback in Derek Carr, wrecked his game, and then benched Carr. McDaniels is very good at blaming everyone else, but the main reason his teams fail is because of him. Now he has all but blown up the franchise, knowing that he cannot be fired with three years remaining on his contract. He is that rare combination of arrogance without the achievements to back it up.

8.) Paul Pelosi — In late 2022, the husband of House Speaker Nancy Pelosi was bludgeoned in his home by a mentally ill leftist political activist ranting and raving about his wife. Mr. Pelosi became a sympathetic figure, but the truth of what happened has been suppressed by the media. Rumors abound that he was attacked by someone he knew and invited over to his home. Whether this was a gay romance gone bad or a legitimate robbery turned violent, the media needs to stop hiding the video footage. The real issue is that Paul Pelosi has been protected his entire life. Earlier in 2022, he caused a drunk driving accident that left him injured and two cars smashed. Again, getting a video of the crime scene has proved impossible. The leftist prosecutors did everything they could to tank the case. This is odd given that Paul Pelosi as a teenager was responsible for a driving crash that killed someone. His rich white liberal privilege prevents him from facing charges for any of these situations or for his years of insider trading. His stock trades would be illegal if done by someone not married to one of the most powerful Democrats in America.

7.) John Fetterman — This rich white leftist spent his entire life doing hard drugs and leeching off of his parents. Like most failures, he became a hardcore leftist virtue-signaler. After a failed stint as a small-town mayor, he decided to fail upward by having his family buy him a Senate seat. Despite suffering a stroke that rendered him incoherent, he insisted on staying in the race. His wife seemed to care more about power than his health. While the Pennsylvania Democrat running for Governor coasted to a 17 point win, Fetterman eked out a one point win over a Republican celebrity with few known core beliefs. Fetterman won by refusing to campaign. He adopted the Joe Biden strategy of hiding in his basement. Now he has six years to get paid without doing any real work. He shows up everywhere in t-shirts and shorts, because rich white leftists believe looking like a bum is the same thing as identifying with people who are struggling. This lazy man of zero accomplishments moralizes to everyone else.

6.) Disney executives — There have been many legitimate reasons to hate Disney over the years. Nevertheless, it is hard to believe the company is worse than when Michael Eisner was around. He only wasted money and created a fraudulent image of Mickey Mouse. A Disney vacation has long been unaffordable, but in 2022 the company began committing corporate suicide by embracing woke leftist politics. Every character had to appeal to transgender people and Black Lives Matter activists or be shut down. When leftists demanded that Disney speak out against a Florida “Don’t say gay” bill that had nothing to do with gay people, Disney buckled to pressure. Florida Governor Ron DeSantis had finally had enough of Disney’s virtue-signaling. He threatened to remove Disney’s special tax exemption. The mice behind the mouse got the message. The CEO was ousted and Bob Iger returned. He is a liberal virtue-signaler himself, but a raging capitalist first. He will replace wokeism with Disney’s true goal, jacking up the stock price.

5.) Sam Brinton — The Biden is famous for hiring tokens. Someone can be completely unqualified to do any real work as long as they belong to a real or invented minority group. Sam Brinton is unsure about his own gender. In Biden’s eyes, this made him qualified to handle nuclear waste material for the government. Brinton spent more time talking about his sexuality than in doing his job. Like most leftists, he labeled anyone questioning his job performance as homophobic. Yet even Brinton found out that a person’s sexuality is not an excuse for being a common criminal thief. After being repeatedly caught on airport cameras stealing other people’s luggage, Brinton was arrested. As flamboyant as he looked while on the job, this person claiming to be a female looked like a standard bald white male in his mugshot. Brinton was hired because he was of an indeterminate gender. He was fired for being a criminal.

4.) Nina Jankowicz — This unbelievably annoying virtue-signaling leftist was selected by Joe Biden to head up his “Disinformation Governance Board.” The real shock is that such a position could even exist in America. Like most leftists, Jankowicz was eager to censor conservatives under the cover of disinformation. Even by normal liberal smugness standards, her chirping altered lyrics to “SuperCalifragiliciousexpialadocious” was insufferable. Outrage against her led to a backlash against this new board. She denied the board and met, got caught lying about this, and resigned under pressure. The board was disbanded. Now this zealot is taking her “talents” to the private sector, where she gets paid to scream “disinformation” at people she hates. Despite her horrible existence in government, her very brief tenure prevented her from being destructive enough to rank higher.

3.) Former Twitter executives — When Elon Musk purchased Twitter, he discovered a cesspool of corruption and censorship. Twitter’s executive team of hardcore leftists took glee in censoring and banning conservatives. Many of the bans were arbitrary under the phony guise of “misinformation.” From Covid to climate change to transgenderism, misinformation was simply anything powerful liberals disagreed with. The main censorship culprits Vijaya Gadde, Yoel Roth, Parag Agrawal. Agrawal was the CEO and Censor-in-Chief who proudly declared that censoring opposing views was acceptable. Roth was the Head of Trust and Safety, a laughable title. Gadde had the even more fraudulent title of Head of Legal, Policy and Trust. The people in charge of “trust” repeatedly got lying about their intentions, methods and practices. As the worst of the bunch, Gadde was naturally hired by the Biden administration to help censorship efforts there. People who can defend their ideas and beliefs do so.People with indefensible ideas and beliefs try to prevent opposing views from being uttered. Normally these wretched would top the list of bimbos, but their influence has been reduced thanks to Musk cleaning house.

2.) Sam Bankman-Fried — Based on his style of dress, this young virtue-signaler might be the love child of John Fetterman and Don King. Sam Bankman-Fried was a 30 year old billionaire who ran a cryptocurrency firm. He showed up to meetings in short and a t-shirt and became a member of the protected class due to his progressive politics. He donated millions of dollars to Democrats. He was the second biggest Democrat donor behind George Soros. Yet behind all of his billions of dollars was not business acumen but outright criminal fraud. Crypto may be complex, but what SBF did was very simple. He commingled customer funds with company funds, illegally withdrew customer funds, and used those customer funds to fund his lavish lifestyle. SBF got away with it for so long for the same reason most of his ilk do. He spouted progressive politics and gave heavily to Democrats. He is a vegan. He supports climate change action and gay rights. He virtue-signals. Democrats in return protected him. He bought their silence with illegally donated stolen campaign cash. Yet the bigger story is that every link in his business chain is fraud. The input is crypto, which is in itself a fraudulent “currency” built on nothing and used to finance drug and sex trafficking. The output is climate change action, which is based on fraudulent pseudo-science and lies meant to manipulate people. SBF was the fraudulent middle man connecting a fraudulent product with fraudulent purposes. The case against him is strong, but powerful people do not want him to testify. Chances are, the prosecutors against him will tank the case.

The only reason SBF is not number one is because he is a private citizen. He is connected on high to powerful people in government, but the guy ahead of him is in charge of a major part of our government.

1.) Merrick Garland — He pretended to be a moderate Democrat so that he could lie his way onto the United States Supreme Court. Republicans smartly figured out that Barack Obama nominated leftists, not moderates. Obama likes people who use their government position to seek revenge on political opponents. Upon becoming Joe Biden’s Attorney General, Garland went into vengeance mode. Under pressure from his fellow angry leftists, Garland became obsessed with imprisoning Donald Trump ahead of the 2024 election. If Donald Trump were truly irrelevant, the Biden administration would ignore him. If Joe Biden won the 2020 presidential election over Trump honestly, Biden would delight in a rematch. At the very least his supporters would not live in fear of this rematch. Democrats are determined to ban Trump from running again, which is what dictators in third world banana republics do to their political opposition.

Under orders from the boss and heavy pressure from the left, Attorney General Merrick Garland ordered a raid on Trump’s Mar-A-Lago mansion. The same FBI agents who perpetrated the 2016 Russia collusion hoax were involved in this raid. Trump was accused of stealing classified documents. This lacks common sense. Any United States President can declare any document unclassified. The double standard was astounding given the kid glove treatment Hillary Clinton received for actually illegally possessing classified documents. Her home was never raided. The raid backfired. Even those who had become weary of Trump’s behavior were outraged at the abuse of government power. In an even more bizarre turn of events, FBI agents felt compelled in the name of “national security” to rifle through Melania Trump’s underwear. Perhaps Garland has weird sexual proclivities akin to Biden or J. Edgar Hoover. He turned a document raid into a panty raid. Garland’s worst quality is his stubborn insistence that he is apolitical and runs the Department of Justice in an apolitical manner. This is nonsense. He kicks in doors with guns drawn and arrests 70 and 80 year old Republicans. He places them in solitary confinement. Democrats get the kid glove treatment. For being more obsessed with Americans who disagree with him politically than with actual global terrorists, Merrick Garland is the top bimbo of 2022.

eric