39 1/2 Saturday

On July 9, 2011, I officially turned 39 1/2.

I have not acknowledged by half birthday since I was 14 1/2 and somebody told me I should have stopped a few years earlier.

I will not be going to Chuck E. Cheese today because the only people my age at Chuck E. Cheese without children are people who should be investigated by the cast of “Law and Order SVU.”

I have never been the midlife crisis type of guy. Perhaps I could be more introspective, but I have always found sitting around thinking about existential stuff and what it all means to be code words for overglorified navel gazing.

I do navel gaze, but that is when I am sitting by the pool, and I literally am contemplating nothing deeper than my own navel. I wonder how many milliliters of water it can hold.

I know that tomorrow I will be closer to age 40 than 39, but my reaction to this metric can be summed up in one word:


Some may point out that if it was no big deal I would not have spent time preparing a column about it. Actually, this is not the case.

I woke up after a nice 10 hour nap (I do like sleeping in on Saturdays), realized I had forgotten to prepare something, and wondered what to write about. I saw the date and thought, “cool, I can do that.”

I guess I am blessed to be a guy who is comfortable in hos own skin. I do not have everything I want in this world, but I believe in the process. I am building a business and seeking a nice woman to settle down with. Today I plan to see friends and at some point I will watch football.

I really am that simple a guy. My needs are few, and I hope that stays constant.

For some people, turning 40 is the end of the world. Turning 39 1/2 is a reminder.

I am just glad that I turned 25 because that allowed me to use rental cars. Turning 35 allowed me to run for president, and I am still contemplating a run. It will be less a run than a walk since I am not into running.

So I guess I will stay the course, since I do not see any need for radical change.

Oh, and I am going to grow my hair long like it was in college. Why? Because I can. Fifteen years on Wall Street meant suits and ties. Now I wear Hawaiian shirts to work.

I prefer to do as I d@mn well please whenever I d@mn well please, which apparently is always.

Life does involve decisions, and the next decision I make will affect my life for several hours. What should I have for lunch? I am torn between the four basic food groups of burgers, pizza, hot dogs, and tacos.

A trip to the pool and jacuzzi will count as exercise.

Happy 39 1/2 birthday to me. The (in)significance is (under)overwhelming.


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