NYE 2020
New Year’s Eve is normally a magical night. On this one night, many of Earth’s seven billion inhabitants temporarily cast aside religion, politics, and even sports rivalries. Peace on Earth briefly breaks out. We bid farewell to a tough year. We pray that the incoming new year will be better, perhaps even peaceful. On this New Year’s Eve 2020, even Lil Jon and Senator Brian Schatz might agree.
We pray for peace, love, and a better world.
The arrival of 2020 had the world brimming with optimism. An exciting new decade would bring unimaginable new triumphs.
Then in March, the entire world faced a pandemic not seen in a century. The Corona virus killed millions of people across the globe and led to even more deaths due to drugs, despair, depression, dementia and suicide. Lives were destroyed. For the first time in a very long time, a significant plurality of Americans replaced optimism with hopelessness.
If 2021 brings anything, it will be sheer relief that 2020 is over. So in that spirit, let us all raise a glass to a new chance at a better individual life and a better overall world.
On this New Year’s Eve 2020, the hours leading into January 1 are not about the Republican Party or the Democrat Party.
It is about house parties, club parties, rooftop parties, and the party for the sake of partying parties.
As for those politicians instituting strict lockdowns and banning such parties, do not be surprised if their edicts are ignored on this night and perhaps for good. Banning celebration will not end suffering. Celebrating is how suffering ends. So enjoy all of those previously mentioned parties.
This is before getting to the after-party.
We eat and drink to excess, dance badly, and upload pictures to social media that should never be uploaded.
For one night, much of the entire civilized world is a happy, peaceful, global family united in sheer joy and revelry.
In all the global celebrations welcoming the end of 2019 and the entire decade of the 2010s, nothing says New Year’s Eve like the convergence of a rap star and an unknown politico.
The rapper is a long-haired, gold-toothed entrepreneur and former Trump Celebrity Apprentice semi-finalist Lil Jon. Dave Chapelle lampooned him as the guy who only says “what” and “ok.”
Lil Jon brought the world one of the greatest party songs, “Shots.”
A celebration of alcohol and fun, plenty of shots will be consumed as 2020 ticks down.
While Lil Jon’s celebrity is established, the senior United States Senator from Hawaii is still fairly early in his political career. With the passing of Senator Daniel Inouye, former Governor Hawaii Neil Abercrombie sent his second in command to Washington in 2012 as the next Senator from Hawaii.
Former Lieutenant Governor Brian Schatz then won the 2014 election to fill out an abbreviated term and the 2016 election to his first full Senate term.
The Senator’s name is spelled “Schatz,” although his last name is pronounced “shots.”
The U.S. Senate has long been about partying, alcohol, and law-breaking in between occasional bouts of governing.
Therefore, the upper chamber of Congress should treat Brian Schatz as a celebrity.
Let Lil Jon do the swearing-in ceremony as the Republican Party (sans Brian Schatz) and the Democrat Party continue to spend like drunken sailors at a never-ending New Year’s Eve Party. COVID is awful, but at least it gives the government an excuse to spend money on anything and everything unrelated to health or science.
Happy New Year Schatzie! Party time!
When I arrive on the Hill, all eyes on me.
Congressional bender, all drinks are free.
We’re drunken spenders, we’re so far gone.
It’s free money time, so come on down!
Schatz, Schatz, Schatz, Schatz Schatz,
Schatz, Schatz, Schatz, Schatz, Schatz,
Schatz, Schatz, Schatz, Schatz, Schatz,
Schatz, everybody!
Schatz, Schatz, Schatz, Schatz, Schatz,
Schatz, Schatz, Schatz, Schatz Schatz,
Schatz, Schatz, Schatz, Schatz, Schatz,
Schatz, everybody!
The ladies love us, when we give free stuff,
We spend your money, on needless fluff,
We’re drunk on power, how ‘bout you?
Bottoms up, let’s go round two!
Schatz, Schatz, Schatz, Schatz, Schatz,
Schatz, Schatz, Schatz, Schatz Schatz,
Schatz, Schatz, Schatz, Schatz, Schatz,
Schatz, everybody!
Schatz, Schatz, Schatz, Schatz, Schatz,
Schatz, Schatz, Schatz, Schatz Schatz,
Schatz, Schatz, Schatz, Schatz, Schatz,
Schatz, everybody!
If you ain’t drunk on power, get out of Congress now!
If you ain’t drunk on power, get out of the White House now!
If you ain’t drunk on power, get out of government now!
Now where are my spendaholics? Printing presses go!
Schatz, Schatz, Schatz, Schatz, Schatz,
Schatz, everybody!
And in conclusion, on this New Year’s Eve 2020…
Party hearty, Senator Schatz! Greece, California, and Detroit are only a few trillion wasted dollars away!
To everyone else, may 2021 be a year of peace, love, and most importantly for revelers, fun!
Also, in honor of the junior Hawaii Senator Mazie Hirono, do not hit on strangers after getting drunk. Friends don’t let friends beer-goggle. This is the Hirono rule, when a guy wakes up the next day, realizes what he has done, and yells, “Her? Oh, no!”
The clock is ticking down to zero hour on New Year’s Eve 2010.
Let’s party! What??????
Happy 2020s! Ok!!!!!!!!