NFL 2016 Week 1 Prequel

September 8th, 2016

NFL 2016 Week 1 Prequel


National Football League: 2016 Predictions

September 8th, 2016

National Football League: 2016 Predictions


NFL 2016 Preseason Week 4 Raiders Recap

September 2nd, 2016

NFL 2016 Preseason Week 4 Raiders Recap

The Oakland Raiders hosted the Seattle Seahawks in the final preseason game for both teams. The third preseason game is the closest to a regular season game, with each team playing their starters into the third quarter. The fourth game is like the first one. The starters barely play, if at all.

Tony Romo is out injured 6 to 10 weeks with the Cowboys. The Minnesota Vikings saw Teddy Bridgewater lost for the season due to a freak non-contact injury in practice. Winning the last preseason game is immaterial. There are only two goals. Keep everybody healthy and give your guys on the bubble as much playing time as possible to see if they can survive the final cut downs and make the team.

Jack Del Rio was taking no chances. Derek Carr spent the night learning how to hold a clipboard and wear a headset. He did not play in this game. Matt McGloin got the start. Russell Wilson played only one series for Seattle. He did combine for a 23-yard completion, but after the drive ended in a punt, Pete Carroll pulled him for Trevor Boykin.

Even for a game of backups, this one was ugly. After a scoreless first quarter, Del Rio pulled McGloin. His preseason overall has been less successful than past preseasons. Connor Cook started the second quarter and also had little success. With less than 5 minutes left in the half of a scoreless game, the Seahawks faced 3rd and 10 from their own 8 yard line. Boykin was called for intentional grounding in the end zone. The resulting safety gave the Raiders a 2-0 halftime lead.

An ugly first half was followed by an ugly second half. Starting with a short field was the closest thing either team had to resembling offense. A 25 yard punt return had the Raiders starting at the Seattle 42. From inside the 20, Cook lobbed a gift to a wide open George Atkinson. Atkinson will never field an easier pass. He dropped it. On 3rd and goal at the 8, Cook threw incomplete. Sebastian Janikowski hit the 27 yard field goal to make it 5-0 Raiders. A 60 yard kickoff return had the Seahawks starting at the Oakland 44. With third string quarterback Heaps in for the Seahawks, he led them to a 3rd and 1 at the 20. A run lost a yard. Steve Hauschka hit the 39 yard field goal to get the Seahawks on the board down 5-3. A field position game had the Raiders taking over at the Seattle 41. Cook did next to nothing but Seabass hit from 45 on the first play of the fourth quarter to make it 8-3 Raiders.

In a very surprise move, after having Heaps play the third quarter, Pete Carroll brought Boykin back in for the fourth quarter. One bright spot in the preseason has been George Atkinson III. Despite dropping the earlier pass, he has run wild in each game, and has a serious chance of making the team. From the Oakland 28, he ripped off gains of 16 and 12 yards. Yet on the next play, he caught a 3 yard pass from Cook and fumbled. Seattle recovered at their own 41. The game just kept getting uglier. On the next play a deep ball that was thrown only to the defender fell incomplete rather than intercepted when the defender fell down. Two plays later from the Oakland 46, Boykin fumbled the center snap exchange and the ball went back to the Raiders. On the next play from scrimmage, Cook was intercepted. The ball was returned for a defensive touchdown. In one of the worst preseason games in history, the Seahawks led 9-8 with 10 1/2 minutes left in regulation.

Cook was terrible, and an incompletion on 3rd and 3 was followed by another punt. The Silver and Black defense had played well all game, but with zero offense to help them, they finally broke down. Helped along by a roughing the passer penalty, The Seahawks ran the ball down Oakland’s throat, without Boykin even needing to throw another pass. When Pope got in from 5 yards out with 5 minutes left, Seattle had the 16-8 lead.

Holton returned the kickoff 31 yards to the Oakland 35, and Atkinson ran 15 yards to midfield. After being terrible all game, Cook went deep to Mickens for a 33 yard gain. On 3rd and 3 from the 10, Atkinson gained 5. Defensive pass interference moved the ball to the one. Atkinson ran up the middle for the touchdown. With 2:17 to play, it was time for the critical 2 point conversion try to tie the game. Cook tried to take it himself around the end but failed to get in as the Raiders trailed 16-14.

The onside kick also failed. With 2:08 to play and the Raiders down to one timeout, the Seahawks faced 2nd and 7 from the Oakland 40. Pope raced for a 33 yard gain, with a horse collar tackle penalty added on. Collins got in from the one to make it 23-14 with 1:19 left. The Seahawks would have been better off not scoring. They could have taken the clock down to practically zeroes. In the preseason coaches spend less time analyzing this stuff.

A game that was beyond boring for 3 1/2 quarters featured some real excitement at the end. Atkinson returned the ensuing kickoff 81 yards for an touchdown. The Raiders had to burn their last timeout due to not having enough men on the field for the extra point try. This cannot happen in the final preseason game. The Raiders were back within 2 point with another onside kick attempt with one minute left. Again it failed, and this time Boykin took a knee to end the game.

2 points in the first half and 6 points in the third quarter were followed by 36 points in the fourth quarter. The Raiders finished 1-3 in the preseason. They are not nearly as good as the Summer buzz. They have little to no depth. Conor Cook is raw and unpolished while McGloin seems to have regressed from last year.

Everything with this team will come down to the star players. Derek Carr, Amari Cooper and Khalil Mack are ready. If any of them get hurt, it could be a long season. This is the year the Raiders are supposed to break the streak of 13 straight non-winning seasons. While preseason can often fool the eyes, it seems the Raiders are still a year away from playoff contention. 23-21 Seahawks


Colin Kaepernick: Backup quarterback, first rate whiner

September 2nd, 2016

Colin Kaepernick: Backup quarterback, first rate whiner


NFL 2016 Preseason Week 3 Raiders Recap

August 28th, 2016

NFL 2016 Preseason Week 3 Raiders Recap

After one well played road game followed by a badly played road game, the Raiders held their first home preseason game of the 2016 NFL season. The third preseason game is the closest one to resembling real football. Starters often play into the third quarter, as was the case in this game.

The offense looked good in the first game and not so good in the second game. Hosting the Tennessee Titans, the Raiders looked very good on the offensive side of the ball. Derek Carr is clearly ready for the regular season. He threw a pair of deep balls that were as perfect as can be. The first, a 41 yard bomb to Michael Crabtree, set up a touchdown. The second one, a 29 yard lob to Amari Cooper went for another touchdown.

At the end of the half, on 3rd and 2 from inside the 10, Carr did miss a wide open Clive Walford. Jack Del Rio decided to go for it on 4th and 2 even though in the regular season the field goal try would be the only option. Carr again misfired and kicked himself at the missed opportunity.

In the third quarter Carr quickly bounced back, leading the Raiders from their own 18 to the Tennessee 35. Trailing 20-14, Carr had the Raiders ready to go back in front. After completing a 17 strike, Del Rio then benched Carr for the night and brought in Matt McGloin. Carr laughed, and McGloin himself was surprised. It is one thing to bring in a backup quarterback in a preseason game in the middle of a quarter, but in the middle of a drive is far more strange. Carr finished an impressive 12 of 18 for 169 yards and 2 touchdowns with 0 interceptions. As for McGloin, he was clearly not ready and neither was the team.

On his first play from scrimmage, offensive holding pushed the Raiders out of long field goal range. On the third play, a short dump off to Washington saw Washington get absolutely blasted. The resulting fumble was returned by Bass 47 yards for a touchdown. Although most of the second half remained, scoring was nil after that. McGloin and Connor Cook each threw an interception.

Another bright spot on offense continues to be running back George Atkinson III, who rushed for 35 yards on 4 carries, including a 23 yarder.

As for defense, the Raiders had none. On the first series, Sean Smith gambled and lost as a near interception on a crossing route turned into a 60 yard gain down to the Oakland 5 yard line. DeMarco Murray pounded the Raiders, gaining 40 yards on 8 carries including a 17 yard run early on. Marcus Mariota carve up the Raiders, going 9 of 16 for 170 yards without an interception or touchdown.

The Titans scored the first four times they had the ball, and Mariota’s last scoring drive took 14 plays and bled 8 1/2 minutes off the clock. The Raiders defense gave up zero points in the second half, but Mariota was on the bench.

The offense is ready for the regular season and the defense is not. The fourth and final preseason game usually has most of the starters sitting, but the Raiders have to be concerned about the defense. 27-14 Titans


NFL 2016 Preseason Week 2 Raiders Recap

August 27th, 2016

NFL 2016 Preseason Week 2 Raiders Recap

After a very impressive 31-10 win at the Arizona Cardinals in the opening 2016 preseason game, the Silver and Black took a giant step back. They were at the Green Bay Packers, and there was more cause for concern than comfort.

Aaron Rodgers did not play. This did not matter, as a backup quarterback punched through the Raiders starting defense on a 14 play, 74 yard drive. Eddie Lacy ran the Raiders into the ground. The Packers took a 7-0 lead. Lacy rushed for 45 yards on 9 carries, and on 3rd and goal at the one, the defense could not stop him. The Raiders responded with a field goal on their opening drive.

While it is true that the starting defense did not give up any points the rest of the half, the opening drive was awful. Making matters worse, the starting offense was listless. Derek Carr and his receivers were out of synch.

The Raiders only trailed 7-3 at halftime, but anemic offense is what has plagued the Raiders in recent seasons and prevented them from getting to the next level. Carr completed 9 of 13 passes, but for only 38 yards. That is way too much sinking and dunking. Latavius Murray had 6 carries for only 19 yards, and that was against a Packers defense playing without Julius Peppers and Clay Matthews.

Matt McGloin had success last week, but was only 2 of 5 for 2 total yards in this game. Connor Cook saw extensive playing time and finished 6 of 9 for 101 yards. Yet the offense could only muster 2 field goals the entire game.

The only Raiders touchdown came late in the game on special teams, when they blocked a punt and recovered in the end zone.

The Raiders starters lost to the Packers backups. It is only preseason, but it is not good. 20-12 Packers

If Donald stays disciplined, Hillary loses in November

August 27th, 2016

If Donald stays disciplined, Hillary loses the election


BLM and KKK fight it out in the Hamptons

August 27th, 2016

BLM and KKK fight it out in the Hamptons


NFL 2016 Preseason Week 1 Raiders Recap

August 14th, 2016

NFL 2016 Preseason Week 1 Raiders Recap

After 6 long months, the NFL is finally back. As much as we leatherheads love football, we hate preseason. It tells us nothing. We watch it because the olympics and baseball are mind-numbingly boring. The Oakland Raiders kicked off the 2016 preseason against the Arizona Cardinals.

With pre-season games, the final score is unimportant. The goal is to evaluate players, see if you have depth, and get everybody out of their healthy. The Cardinals are a Super Bowl contender. The Raiders are an improved team, but most likely still a year away from being elite. However, it seems the years of frustration are in the past. This team has potential. This game was a measuring stick on what the Raiders could be and what they are.

Starting from their own 26 after a 31 yard kickoff return, Derek Carr immediately threw a 16 yard completion to Michael Crabtree. However, the drive stalled along with 2 dumb penalties. Keliche Osemele committed a false start and Carr took a delay of game. Carr and Jack Del Rio said they wanted crisp and clean football. This was not it.

The Cardinals soon faced 3rd and 10 at their own 20. Carson Palmer then brought the reality check. An 11 yard completion to JJ Nelson was followed by a 30 yard completion to Michael Floyd. Dave Johnson had runs of 8 and 23 yards. The Cardinals reached the Oakland 4 yard line before the defense finally stiffened. Chandler Catanzaro hit a 25 yard field goal. The Cardinals led 3-0.

So early indications were not positive. The Arizona first stringers won on both sides of the ball. Palmer was done for the night.

Carr played one more series. A 22 yard completion to Crabtree moved the ball to the Arizona 36, where the drive immediately died. However, Sebastian Janikowski drilled a 53 yard field goal that would have been good from 63. In his 17th season, seeing Seabass hit the long ones is still cause for optimism in close games. With the game tied 3-3, Carr was done for the night.

Carr was only 3 of 7 for 44 yards, but a gorgeous deep ball to Amari Cooper was incomplete only because Cooper did not get his feet inbounds. Carr has had his shackles removed. He is not drinking and dunking. He throws it down the field.

Now it was time for the backups. Drew Stanton and Matt McGloin both saw their teams go 3 and out on their first series. Then came the turnovers. Nelson fumbled a punt and the Raiders recovered at the Arizona 19. Jack Del Rio decided to be aggressive. McGloin quickly fired to Clive Walford in the end zone for the touchdown and the 10-3 Raiders lead. One play later from the Arizona 12, Stanton threw deep middle and was intercepted by Nate Allen. Allen returned it 27 yards to the Arizona 12. One play after that, McGloin threw the touchdown to Andre Holmes. The Raiders had a 17-3 lead after the first quarter.

McGloin plays very well in preseason against backups, but has struggled in regular season games as a starter. While both his touchdown throws were solid, the Raiders began both drives in the red zone. McGloin was not able to lead a scoring drive when the Raiders had more realistic field position. He completed 3 of his other 9 throws for a total of 10 yards.

In the second quarter the Cardinals finally got going with help from a 35 yard run by Andre Ellington. Ellington’s 5 yard touchdown run had the Cardinals within 17-10. Stanton was done for the night, finishing 2 of 6 for 42 yards. McGloin played the rest of the half, but both teams gave away scoring opportunities as Matt Barkley took over for the Cardinals. He would play for much of the game.

After an exchange of punts, a 25 yard run had the Raiders at the Arizona 35. A West Coast Offense dink and dunk pass lost 3 yards and then saw Holmes fumble the ball away. The Cardinals moved to the Oakland 23 but Catanzaro missed a 41 yard field goal. Oakland then faced 3rd and 3 at their own 38. McGloin completed a short pass for the first down, but illegal use of hands on the offense meant 3rd and 13 followed by an incompletion and a punt. The Raiders led 17-10 at halftime.

In the third quarter Barkley moved the Cardinals all the way from the Arizona 22 to the Oakland 15. However, Barkley was then intercepted by Nikeo Thorpe. Thorpe would bail the Raiders out later on by recovering a fumble of his teammate to prevent a turnover.

Although Arizona did not score on their next drive, Raider fans should still be concerned. On 3rd and 7 from the Arizona 34, Barkley threw incomplete but roughing the passer kept the drive going. From the Oakland 45, Barkley was intercepted but defensive pass interference gave Arizona another chance from the Oakland 39. Give the defense credit. They stopped the drive and forced a punt.

The rest of the scoring belonged to running back George Atkinson III, son of the legendary hard hitting Raiders secondary star of the 1970s. Atkinson is not succeeding on nepotism. He can play. Yes, he was playing against backups, but he still played well. Atkinson ran for touchdown runs of 53 yards in the third quarter and 35 yards late in the game to complete the scoring.

Barkley finished a terrible 8 of 24 for 121 yards and an interception. With 3 minutes left in the third quarter, rookie 4th round draft pick Conor Cook came in for the Raiders. Given that Carr is firmly entrenched as the starter, the drafting of Cook made little sense. However, now it was time to see what he could do. He finished 7 of 11 for 71 yards.

Cook began his first drive at the Oakland 9 yard line. On 3rd and 4, a short pass to Washington went for a 32 yard gain. The next play saw Atkinson do the rest. So a 4 play, 91 yard touchdown drive is a nice welcome to the NFL for Cook. On the next 2 drives Cook faced critical 3rd and 3. The first time Cook could not convert, but the second time he did. On the next drive Cook threw a 33 yard completion to the Arizona 28, but offensive pass interference ruined that moment.

With 10 minutes left, Arizona’s fourth string quarterback Coker came in. With 3 1/2 minutes left and the Cardinals down by 21, Bruce Arians reminded the football world that preseason is about staying healthy. He called 6 straight runs up the middle and ran out the clock.

The Raiders did some things right. In a regular season game, beating Arizona by 21 in Arizona would be miraculous. This is preseason, so the celebration should be significantly tempered.

The Raiders rushed for 166 yards, which is good. However, they gave up 172 rushing yards, which is not good. The Raiders were outgunned in total yards 383 to 322. They were only 3 for 12 on third down. They lost the time of possession battle badly 35 1/2 minutes to 24 1/2 minutes. The number of penalties was totally unacceptable, 11 for 86 yards lost. Arizona only had 3 penalties for 20 yards.

A positive note was the offense not giving up a sack or an interception. They turned the ball over once while taking it away from Arizona three times. They had 69 return yards to only 23 for Arizona, a big field position special teams differential. The Raiders scored touchdowns in the red zone rather than field goals. Staying aggressive worked for Del Rio.

Overall it is hard to find fault with a 21 point win, even in preseason. However, the penalties must be reduced. For the very first game, it was a good start to the season. 31-10 Raiders

More Hillary Clinton Jokes

August 13th, 2016

More Hillary Clinton Jokes

Power-obsessed Hillary Clinton is consulting polls and focus groups to learn why she’s running for President.

With the gender card failing, Hillary Clinton is now demanding we vote for her since it’s been seven years since we had a man in White House.

Hillary Clinton hired Rachel Dolezal and Rupaul to learn what race and gender she should be. She has vowed to be her real self upon learning what she is.

Hillary Clinton is terrified the FBI will find proof on her server of Bill Clinton‘s eHarmony and Ashley Madison profiles.

The real Hillary Clinton email scandal came when Huma Abedin found out Hillary and Anthony Weiner liked each other on Tinder.

Hillary Clinton is like Glenn Close in “Fatal Attraction.” She will not be ignored. However, In Hillaryworld, the bored bunny rabbit kills himself.

Hillary Clinton sent GOP 2016 presidential contenders her book. She plans to win in 2016 by boring her opponent to death. The GOP candidates vowed to use it to torture Islamist prisoners at Guantanamo Bay.

Hillary Clinton is uncomfortable that her server is backed up. Somebody needs to get her some prune juice and a bran muffin. She’s full of it.

At least Hillary Clinton is willing to compromise to get things done. She’s compromised her integrity, her competence, and America’s safety.

The Dan Rather movie is called “Truth.” The sequel will be a Hillary Clinton bio directed by Rosie O’Donnell called “Kindness.”

O44 strips “man” from all military titles. Makes sense. He had his own title of man stripped years ago by Michelle.

More proof O44 would never survive as a Muslim. “Michelle, Sharia says you have to submit to me.” She’d beat the tar out of him.

O44 only pushing gun control because he’s desperate for a legacy. He should relax. He has a legacy. It’s called failure

3 guys stormed #Trump VT rally. 1 calmly intoned, “I’m Larry, this is my brother Darryl, this is my other brother Darryl.”

Saw 2 people nearly get in fistfight. One yelled #Trump! Other yelled #NoTrump! 80-year old ladies take bridge seriously.

O44 was not crying. His mascara was running.

O44 signs executive order declaring himself competent relevant success

2nd Amendment exists so innocent women can protect themselves from #BillClinton.

Thanks to O44, America’s Star Spangled Banner has been replaced with Smokey Robinson’s “Tears of a clown.”

Am I pro-Israel? The country, yes. Steve Israel, no.

O44 like guy in “Office Space” who can’t be fired. His desk moved to boiler room, he still insists GOP took his stapler. He’s irrelevant.

Clockboy is back, finally confesses to being love child of O44 & Pajamaboy. Allah Clockbar!

If gay Orlando nightclub murderer’s dad wants any credibility, he needs to disavow Hillary Clinton.

Dan Rather attacking Trump. When pressed, Rather claimed his remarks were fake but accurate.

What Trump said about Hillary was nothing. You want violence? Picture what Hillary screamed at Bill in private over his women.

Hillary Clinton’s problem is not that 1/2 the country hates her. It’s that she hates 1/2 the country.

NYT dolt Thomas Friedman says Trump fosters violence. NYT gave away secret troop movements, getting US soldiers killed. Liberal violence. It just never ends. That does not even factor in those who have died from being bored to death reading Thomas Friedman. His columns cause climate change. He’s almost as big a gasbag as John Kerry.

Of course media focused on Trump. Hillary bores them to sleep. Hard to cover a story when you’re in a coma.

If Donald Trump cured cancer, media would blame him for putting doctors out of work.

Hillary Clinton upon getting elected vows to scream at us all until we eat our vegetables.

Trump says he has only had sex with women, not men. Hillary Media claims this is proof of his sexism & homophobia. His discrimination is sickening. True decent human beings don’t discriminate. They act like Bill Clinton and have sex with anything and everything regardless of race, religion or level of ugliness.

Michael Phelps won 23 gold medals. Bill Clinton struck gold with 23 year old interns.

Julian Assange runs Wikileaks. Hillary Clinton too old to run, has a wick that leaks.

Liberal Martin Sheen called Donald Trump “empty headed moron.” Explains why Trump kids are into drugs & hookers. Oh wait. Never mind. I’ll side with Trump values over Martin Sheen Hollywood values.

Secret Service investigating Trump’s comments. Nobody investigating Secret Service South American hookers.

Nutcase climbing Trump Tower. Meanwhile, Hillary Clinton still climbing the walls over Bill’s sex scandals.

Nutcase climbing Trump Tower warned that if he’s captured, he may become backup QB for NY Jets.

Nutcase scaling up Trump Tower almost as fast as Bill Clinton scaling an intern.

Nutcase scaling up Trump Tower is like the Olympics without Zika.

Secret Service is questioning Trump. Meanwhile, decent society is questioning Hillary Clinton.

Unlike Hillary Clinton, Trump Tower nutcase didn’t get anyone killed during his climb to the top. If Hillary loses election, I can see her in the dead of night climbing up Trump Tower or White House, hell-bent on gaining entry. She will ask Bill Clinton for his expertise, but he will tell her that his knowledge consists of sneaking out of the White House, not into it.

Q: Is it ok for any Republican to support Hillary Clinton? A: Only if she’s committing her own euthanasia & you’re Dr. Kevorkian.

If Hillary Clinton spent less time violating God’s 10 Commandments, maybe she’d spend less time violating my 10 Amendments.

When is Hillary Clinton not angry? How can an angry woman who screams all the time lecture anyone else about temperament?

Liberals to boycott McDonalds after learning that Egg McMuffin is running for president as a conservative independent. No word yet on whether the vice presidential nominee will come with bacon, sausage, or for Jews who keep kosher, beef.

Donald Trump never denied eating babies. This is further evidence that he eats babies. This was today’s Liberal Media Report. The only babies harmed during the making of this report were liberals engaged in crying temper tantrums before this report was issued anyway. Their harm was emotional only, and consistent with their lives, not rational.

Publicly Dan Rather says media “must shame” Donald Trump. Privately rather admitted not knowing what shame was. An investigative report concluded that Rather had none. What Rather meant was media must be ashamed of how they cover Donald Trump. Meanwhile, Rather still believes that Hillary Clinton is ethical by Rather standards and that the 2004 memos were fake but accurate.

Democrats should make “Freakout! Le freak, c’est chique” their official campaign song. They freak out over every little thing. Plus it has French words and they worship anything French. This was today’s anti-Donald Trump Liberal Hysteria Disco Report.