In exchange for Romney’s Swiss bank accounts
The latest attempt to demonize Mitt Romney for having worked hard and succeeded in life revolves around his Swiss bank accounts.
Mr. Romney should reveal the amount of money he has overseas. He should do this the day after certain actions by Mr. Obama are undertaken, completed, and publicly disclosed in the name of “fairness.”
eric
President Obama despises tax cuts
Another day, another round of presidential class warfare.
President Obama just can’t stop.
Once again, President Obama is trying to save his collapsing presidency by pitting people against each other. His Milli-Vanillionth attempt to demonize “the rich” must fail.
The fight over the George W. Bush tax cuts is no longer a policy dispute. Policy disputes should cease to exist when the dispute is completely removed.
eric
Barack Obama’s Second Term
President Obama is running for reelection. A fair question based on his record is…why?
What does Barack Obama stand for? Given four more years, what would he actually do? Why does he think it would work?
eric
Meeting Sgt Rex
On April 12th, 2012, a flight from New York to Los Angeles was delayed 60 seconds so that a pair of passengers in first class could be given standing ovations by the rest of the passengers.
The story of Sargent Rex had ended in a happy ending only five days earlier.
So on this Sunday, I just want to say what an honor it was to sit in first class that day and meet that woman. Her response to me was that “Sgt Rex is the real hero.”
In this tough world, let’s just enjoy feel-good stories every once in awhile to remind us that this world still has so much good in it.
Happy ordinary July Sunday to an extraordinary pair of heroes.
Great meeting you Sgt Rex.
eric
Why I abandoned conservatism
Jonathan Krohn was a 13-year-old conservative sensation at CPAC. Now at age 17 he is a liberal. Before attacking Krohn’s Disease, It is obvious why he switched. Sadly, I can relate.
His abandoning conservatism is significantly less important than my decision to do the same. After four decades since my birth to Republican parents and over two decades of only voting Republican, an event in the last year has forced me to abandon everything I believe in.
It kills me to say it, but I am now a liberal Democrat.
I favor gay marriage. In fact, I am so pro-gay marriage that I favor it for straight people as well. Everybody should be gay and marry each other. I also favor gay marriage for animals, especially baby seals.
I favor cap and trade legislation to ensure that every single business is put out of business. If only people completely disappeared, the planet could be left alone.
I favor banning the word “illegal” when referring to illegal immigrants. They should be referred to as either “undocumented workers” or “people who got really lost and made the wrong left turn at Albuquerque.”
The rich need to pay their fair share. In fact, they need to pay everything. I favor a 100% tax on all rich people and complete redistribution of wealth to poor people. Then when the formerly poor become newly rich, we can tax them at 100% to help out the formerly rich and now poor people. Being middle class would be declared illegal so as not to confuse people.
I was going to favor abortion on demand, but demanding things can be seen as insensitive. Therefore I now favor abortion on very serious but polite request. To give society enough of a chance to truly evaluate people, abortion shall be legal up to the 200th trimester.
I will embrace every liberal policy regardless of the results.
Conservatism is dead to me. Liberalism is the only answer.
My reasons for doing this come down to a deeply held principle that affects every aspect of me from head to toe, from top to bottom.
A really hot liberal brunette let me (redacted) her (redacted) in a jacuzzi.
Between her body jiggles and the spa bubbles, all oxygen was removed from my cranial activity.
Every time I tried to explain why conservatism made sense, she resorted to blackmail, explaining that anything out of my mouth deviating from liberal orthodoxy would resort in her refusing to continue (redacted) my (redacted) until I (redacted).
I am now against coercive interrogation methods as well, including the ones she used on me in the jacuzzi. Withholding (redacted) does qualify a torture, and the Geneva Convention should be amended to include this cruel method of information extraction.
While I became aware that this would lead to a column with more (redacted) than Fast and Furious memos, this line of thought is now banned to me as well.
Barack Obama is the greatest President of any leader in world history, and Eric Holder is the smartest, handsomest, most honest Attorney General who ever walked this globe.
My conversion to liberalism was painful, and her demands kept coming.
So I am now a liberal.
Actually, as this column was being written, she sent me a text. She now only wants to be friends, and (redacted) her (redacted) was an experience that will not be repeated.
As a man of principle, there is only one thing to do.
I admit that I have been right my entire life before meeting this woman. Liberalism is evil, and conservatism is the only true, sane path.
I am now a conservative again.
My mind is finally made up, unless of course she and her (redacted) change hers and theirs.
eric
Independence Day is a celebrating of cherishing American freedom. The greatest freedom we have is freedom of speech.
Naturally, that somehow leads to me getting tons of hate mail.
For the sake of full disclosure, much of this hate mail was sent to me in June, not July. So for those who will claim that makes this column one big lie, please do not reproduce. Your children will be exponentially more useless to society.
While leftists in general are the problem, lately it is Ron Paulbots who are the main source of hostility in America.
They seem to think the First Amendment applies to private entities. It actually prevents the government from restricting speech. There is no constitutional right to own a keyboard and internet access, much less use it for abusive purposes.
Nevertheless, watching some of these critters in their natural habitat is quite entertaining. Sometimes it is tough to tell the difference between gorillas and guerrillas. Either way, feed the Paulbots some peanuts and bananas, sit back, and enjoy my July hate mail.
“matt
[email protected]
why do you write such horrible articles? please stop for the sake of humanity”
Analysis: As long as I know that there are imbeciles who are compulsively addicted to responding, I will keep writing. Actually, that is a lie. When they stop commenting I will still keep writing. So here is my message to Paulbots: You don’t matter.
“James Borden
[email protected]
Pussy!!!!!!”
Analysis: While I am the TYGRRRR EXPRESS, I am actually male. I am not sure why this individual thinks I am female. Maybe he is just frustrated at what he is chasing at and not receiving. Maybe if he put down his keyboard and went outside with a clean shirt on, a woman would talk to him. That is the first step to getting the kitty kat stuff.
“Eric Golub's God
[email protected]
Eric its your gay god. you have done a great job at fucking your own life. you made your gay god very proud :). Now finish your task by killing yourself in a very gay manner. HAHA Retard!!”
Analysis: I love it when Paulbots insist they are not bigots and then think insulting an entire group of people somehow hurts me. I happen to be heterosexual, but if I was gay, why would that be a source of shame? Also, do gay people who commit suicide do it differently than straight people? Also, if God is homosexual, who is his partner? Or are they lesbians? Perhaps I am overthinking this, and the commenter is simply the result of a bigot mating with a crackpot.
“Sam
[email protected]
Fuck you gay homo fag.”
Analysis: At least this anti-gay bigot is good at brevity. The previous homophobic commenter is still rambling. I wonder what the difference is between a crackpot and a lunatic.
“jt
[email protected]
and also judging by the comments on your page , you are wrong on everything as always , hahaha, as an american, a christian, and a person of common sense I vehemently disagree with your narrow minded zionist view of the israeli occupation of defenseless palestinian land . . once again you have only served to further ruin your already denigrated reputation. dar god does humanity pity you . ron paul supporters are not antisemitism you are just a neocon zionist coward and the world laughs at you as such , end of story .”
Analysis: This guy is actually kind of funny. I can picturing this guy slaughtering a live goat, dipping his ripped Ron Paul t-shirt with the blood, and placing the t-shirt back to his lips. Perhaps mix the blood in with some ground beef, and it makes some great anti-Zionist tacos. Just don’t add cilantro. That would upset the balance. Oh, and make sure the goat wants to end the Federal Reserve before sacrificing it to keep things true to the Ron Paul faith.
“heyman
[email protected]
kiss my ass.”
Analysis: It is good to know that fiscally responsible people in a down economy would spend money on a donkey. Sorry, I don’t kiss Democrats, unless they are really, really hot. If you meant your literal rumpus, there would have to be money in it for me, even if I was just sucking out poison from a snake bite.
Say it with me everybody. These are leftists and Paulbots. This is how they behave.
eric
Anderson Cooper is still gay, Americans are still indifferent, and CNN is still boring.
eric
Happy 236, America!
To our current troops and our veterans everywhere, thank you for your service.
To American old and new, Happy Independence Day.
Happy July 4th. God Bless the USA.
eric
The legacy of John Roberts
Several days have passed since Supreme Court Chief Justice John Roberts shocked the political establishment by joining the liberals on the court to uphold the Affordable Care Act. His vote gave Obamacare a 5-4 survival. Justice Robert struck down the law under the Commerce Clause but upheld it as a tax.
While liberals were prepared to demonize the “racist” Supreme Court, conservatives have been for the most part muted and respectful at what seems like a tragic betrayal.
http://communities.washingtontimes.com/neighborhood/tygrrrr-express/2012/jul/5/legacy-john-roberts/
eric
The “legitimacy” of the Supreme Court
The political Earthquake from the Supreme Court ruling on Obamacare is still reverberating.
Chief Justice John Roberts sided with the liberals to uphold the incorrectly named Affordable Care Act by a 5-4 margin. The reasoning was that Justice Roberts wanted to preserve the “legitimacy” of the Supreme Court.
This legitimacy argument sounds good except for one small problem.
eric