THE TYGRRRR EXPRESS

Ronald Reagan, your next of kin is Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker.

As Iowa Republicans prepare for the Thursday debate and the Saturday straw poll, Iowa may be the last civilized place left on Earth. This is not surprising, since large concentrations of conservative Republicans usually leads to peaceful interactions. The Tea Party epitomizes peaceful political activism. Leftist baboons could learn from this. Actually they can’t, but let’s pretend they could.

Are there any leftists anymore who just shut up, keep their heads down, and go to work without complaining?

If not, do any of them ever air their grievances in a non-violent manner?

In Greece, leftists are setting the country on fire to protest the government’s decision to enact budget cuts to save the entire nation. The left is convinced that getting everything for nothing will last forever. Is there a single conservative rioting? Possibly, but doubtful.

In London, hooligans are protesting against the police. Shockingly enough, the police might actually this one time crack down. Again, it is doubtful that law and order conservatives are in the street rioting against law enforcement.

In Chicago and Philadelphia, “flash mobs” are a new trendy way to describe criminals and thugs. Failed human beings in failed inner cities are attacking failure by destroying society around them, and shockingly enough, causing more failure.

In all of these cities people think it is simply acceptable to take things from “the man.” It is permissible to beat and rob people in the name of “equal justice.” Like History of the World Part I, where it was “beggars, begging from beggars,” we now have worldwide leftists attacking those in power by beating up their fellow leftists. The best one can hope for is that they will all eventually eliminate each other. There is no hope for them in terms of becoming civilized human beings. Maybe the mobs can burn down universities so that there will be nobody left to teach them how to be leftist protesters.

Wisconsin is in a struggle to become more like Iowa and less like Chicago, Philadelphia, London, and Greece. The leftist savages are being beaten back.

Governor Scott Walker has still been too patient for my tastes. He has not had his police force or security detail use rubber bullets or fire hoses on the Moveon and SEIU protesters in his state. Liberals will claim that they have a right to peacefully protest. This would be true except they keep forgetting the peaceful part. Vandalizing government buildings is not what democracy should look like.

Yet Governor Walker keeps winning.

First Republicans won the 2010 election. Governor Walker, in a concept foreign to liberals, governed as he campaigned.

In an attempt to enact a law to keep unions from destroying his state, the Democrats in the legislature broke the law and fled to a foreign state. Governor Walker decided not to hire bounty hunters. Instead he just had the law passed anyway.

Democrats then returned and tried to have the courts overturn the law. Liberals love using the courts since they fail at legislative governing. Again, Governor Walker won.

Liberals then tried to fire one of the Wisconsin judges in an attempt to hijack the court solely due to this law. Again, liberals lost. Republicans and Governor Walker won.

Liberals then tried to recall six Republican state legislators. Again, they lost. Republicans and Governor Walker won.

Will liberals get the message? Of course not. Now they will try and recall Governor Walker. If they succeed, Lieutenant Governor Rebecca Kleefisch would take over. She is just as conservative if not more. She would make the left even more crazed.

This is fantastic. Governor Scott Walker may be the next Ronald Reagan because he understands what to do with people sworn to his destruction. He crushes them. More importantly, he bankrupts them.

George Soros spent millions trying to defeat George W. Bush in 2004. He failed, but id not blink an eye over the pocket change he wasted. Yet like the Soviet Union, labor unions do not have pockets that deep. Reagan did not win the Cold War because the Soviets discovered morality. Reagan bankrupted them.

Unions have spent close to 100 million dollars in Wisconsin over the last couple of years. That money could have been used to actually help the downtrodden. Given that the leftists embodied by the unions are power hungry madmen who do not care one bit about the downtrodden, it makes perfect sense that they would spend millions of dollars that could have actually helped people.

The only way to deal with unions is to bankrupt them. The only way to deal with leftist protesters is to bankrupt them. When their choices are eating hot food and sleeping indoors or freezing to death outside while protesting, some of them may decide that starvation is not worth the cause.

Governor Walker may never be willing to break out the batons and crack skulls like SEIU would, but at least he is willing to keep enacting policies designed to let leftists spend every last dollar in their bleeding wallets.

This is why there is hope for Wisconsin while much of the rest of America and the world is on fire.

May liberals keep destroying themselves until they stop smoking the crack pipe of their own self-righteousness. Since they will never stop, may their drug habit of rage deplete their life savings until they either enter detox or become walking zombie lunatics less coherent than Al Gore and Howard Dean.

As Republicans debate in Iowa, I will support any candidate who vows to imitate Scott Walker on a national level. Leftist protesters will learn how to assemble calmly and peaceably, or a law and order crackdown that will make Kent State seem like a Tea Party walk in the park should take place.

To dream the impossible dream…where leftists learn human behavior, either voluntarily or by force.

eric

Every mere mortal, which consists of people not named Barack Obama, need to get their collective ears checked.

Since Barack Obama is perfect, everybody else needs to apologize for misunderstanding him.

In 2008 we all mistakenly thought that he ran for president on the slogan “Change we can believe in.”

I never knew who this “we” was because I never believed him. I thought he was a likable fellow who was full of (redacted). He was a typical liberal politician.

After starting his presidency by announcing that he had inherited a mess, it was only a matter of time before he would stop blaming his predecessor, roll up his sleeves, and get to work.

Now it seems that a matter of time is a sliding scale itself.

On his fiftieth birthday, he defended his results, or as those not living in fantasyland call them, lack of results.

“When I said ‘change we can believe in’ I didn‘t say ’change we can believe in tomorrow.’ Not change we can believe in next week. We knew this was going to take time because we’ve got this big, messy, tough democracy.”

Did he not know that the system the Founding Fathers set in place still existed when he took office? Did he think he was taking over Syria?

This is the same man who one month ago laughed off a failure to create jobs by saying that “Shovel-ready was not as … uh .. shovel-ready as we expected.”

Not since Bill Clinton said “it depends what the meaning of ‘is’ is” has a man been so graceful in eluding the exposure of his hollow emptiness.

The world misheard Mr. Obama. He did not speak about change WE can believe in.

He actually said that everything was about change HE can believe in.

This man is the modern day Streetcar Named Desire. He is every bit as feminine as Blanche, who never does come to accept that the old ways that failed are gone forever. Although the entire readership knows that Blanche is a liar, in her world she is telling the truth simply because she truly believes it.

Like Stanley Kowalski, Americans are just ugly commoners not sophisticated enough to understand that everything Barack Obama says is true solely because he said it. Everything he does is brilliant because he does it. Every mistake is everybody else’s error.

When the president comes across as a clod by violating protocol in front of Queen Elizabeth, his defenders claim that protocol is obsolete and silly.

Protocol is a small matter, but governing is a large one.

When Mr. Obama failed in his first year, it was because he inherited a mess from Republicans.

When he failed in his second year, it was because the people were frustrated. He had near super-majorities in both houses of congress, but his boredom and disengagement from doing any real work was seen as “letting the process work itself out.”

After he lost congress, he continued to fail in his third year. This was blamed on a variety of people from the Koch Brothers to Grover Norquist, to Tea Party attendees. All of these are private citizens participating in the political process, and doing so legally. The left seemed peeved that the conservative Kowalskis were out of their cages, much less allowed outside during the daylight to play a role in society. How dare these peasants have a voice!

We now know that while Mr. Obama looked new from a physical standpoint, his ideas were the same tired, old, failed ideas espoused by Michael Dukakis, Al Gore, and John Kerry. Guilty white liberals found him fascinating, but to the rest, he was quite boring indeed.

The financial markets have no idea what color his skin is. The NASDAQ cannot fathom that his melanin content would forever alter liberalism. In return, Mr. Obama has no idea what a NASDAQ is because it has nothing to do with green collar jobs. The stock exchanges are comprised of what in today’s world would be called “companies.” Companies “do things.” The things they do is “produce stuff.” The stuff is either “goods” or “services.” This is lost on Mr. Obama, who tried to pat NASDAQ on the head like it was Sasha and Malia’s puppy. He knew best, and would take care of everything despite not knowing how to do things, make stuff, or understand goods and services.

For these and so many other reasons, people need to stop criticizing Mr. Obama and seeing him as a liar. He truly does believe what he says. The fact that many of the seven billion global inhabitants are confused or underwhelmed by him is lost on him. They simply cannot grasp his greatness.

So from now on, we need to embrace change he can believe in. When his fourth year turns out to be a failure, he can then tell us that what he really meant to say was “Keynes we can believe in.”

When a reporter points out that Keynesian stimulus has totally failed and is at the heart of the current doldrums, he can say that he meant “range we can believe in.” The economy moves in a wide range, and no matter what part of the business cycle we are currently in from boom to bust, it is still within a range. Therefore, he is right and conservative critics are dunderheads.

Perhaps he can continue to claim he understands sports by saying that what he really said was “Grange we can believe in.” After all, “Galloping Ghost” Red Grange was one of the greatest Chicago Bears players in football history.

Maybe he meant “Change we can perceive in.” The problems are all in our mind. Everything is fine, if only Americans would realize that the economic misery inflicted by him on his watch is purely psychosomatic.

So as Barack Obama leads America down the path to ruination, the only thing left to do is find somebody to play “Taps.” Then again, why settle for just ordinary Taps when the spinal route is available. Barack Obama’s entire presidency is hollow slogans and empty platitudes that sound lofty but mean absolutely nothing. He is a caricature of himself, a post-modern satirist that understands neither the past, the present, the future, or the irony of his lack of understanding of virtually everything. He is the Spinal Tap President.

So in honor of his honor of all things himself, his 2012 reelection slogan should be taken from the Spinal Tap song “The Majesty of Rock.” It will be changed to “The Majesty of Barack.”

Get ready for the greatest empty Obama slogan since the one he uttered moments earlier while we were all tuning him out.

“The more it stays the same…the less it changes.”

Hey, it beats him mixing all of his slogans together in one ball of nothingness.

“Yes, I hope we can change.”

I agree with him. Yes, I hope we can change…leadership.

Firing Mr. Obama…now that is change we can believe in, even if it is not change he can believe in.

eric

Yesterday I spoke at a rally in Council Bluffs, Iowa as a warmup to Herman Cain. I got to meet Michele Bachmann as well. Today I drive from just past the Omaha, Nebraska border all the way to Fort Dodge, Iowa. I am speaking tonight at a rally for Governor Tim Pawlenty. Herman Cain may be there as well.

Now on to the Obama stock market downgrade crash.

One of the great myths about people and entities is that they “have to” or “must be” better than they really are.

Certain stocks look great “on paper,” so they have to go up. Then they crash.

Celebrities look incredibly pleasant on television, so they must be good people in real life.

A person went to Harvard, so they “have to be top tier.” Then we learn dolts can be found everywhere.

Barack Obama had people literally swooning on the campaign trail. He was “new,” “fresh,” and “exciting.” He was “brilliant.”

Three years into his presidency, so many people are at a loss as to how somebody so perfect that he would heal the planet and cause the oceans to rise would fail to do so. They blame his critics and other “obstructionists,” but if he really were a demigod wouldn’t they be irrelevant? Couldn’t he just speak and mesmerize them until they bowed down, prostrated themselves into uncomfortable positions, and dropped grapes into his mouth?

Yet when asked what makes him so brilliant, Mr. Obama’s toadies keep coming up with unsatisfactory answers.

“He speaks so well.”

He is helpless without his teleprompter.

“He went to Harvard. He headed the Harvard Law Review.”

The worst law student is still called “attorney” and the worst medical student is still called “doctor.” The Supreme Court has a Chief Justice and juries have a foreman. That person has a title with no additional influence over any of the other members.

“He has a rich background. He lived in Asia.”

Is every Asian person a genius? The Chinese have one billion people. Not every one of them is a genius. There are plenty of Chinese people who are among the dumbest people on the planet because they are uneducated. The ones addicted to Opium are not the best and brightest.

Barack Obama as a college students was one of the most ordinary average people on the planet. He was a slacker and a stoner. Yes a certain amount of drugs could make Jack Kerouac or Timothy Leary seem like the pinnacle of civilization, but those not into drugs have a right to remain underwhelmed.

The very criticism that the left applied to Mr. Obama’s predecessor applies directly to Mr. Obama himself. An average guy with a winning smile and little substance charmed enough people and bungled his way into running an entire nation. Some imbeciles like Bashar Assad in Syria inherit the power, so Mr. Obama is less insignificant than the world’s dumbest opthalmologist overseas. That does not say much.

Yet Mr. Obama’s predecessor did not need feint praise. He wanted real counsel. Mr. Obama needed to be the smartest man in the room, resulting in questionable hiring choices. His best choice was Robert Gates as Defense Secretary. Of course, Mr. Gates was “inherited” from the Bush administration. Perhaps had Mr. Obama kept the entire Bush cabinet he would have been successful.

For Treasury Secretary, Mr. Obama chose Timothy Geithner.

The announcement of Mr. Geithner sent the stock market rocketing upward 500 points. The Wall Street Journal, consisting of people who normally really do know virtually everything, gushed. “Continuity you can believe in” was the headline. I myself bought into the hype, declaring the selection of Mr. Geithner to be a “home run out of the ballpark.”

Mr. Geithner was deemed to be the one indispensable man who could save the American economy. This was the guy we needed. Yet in hindsight, he was just another overrated fellow who coasted to power based on his own pedigree.

He was the head of the Federal Reserve Bank of New York. He reported straight to Alan Greenspan and Ben Bernanke. More importantly than anything else in this world, he worked at Goldman Sachs.

A hush fell over the crowd as they swooned. They said it over and over again. He…worked…at…Goldman…Sachs. Goldman Sachs is the Harvard of Wall Street. Their very name commands respect from those who cling to antiquated notions of reputation and pedigree mattering more than results.

Timothy Geithner worked at Goldman Sachs. He “had” to be the very best.

Goldman Sachs brought the world Robert Rubin and Hank Paulson. Doesn’t that matter?

No. Goldman Sachs also brought the world Jon Corzine. They eventually fired Corzine, but his reputation remained sterling as he bungled his way higher to the Governorship of New Jersey. He was then fired from that job by an overweight, blunt, common looking man named Chris Christie who became a rock star not by pedigree, but…shock of shock…actually knowing how to do things and doing them.

As the financial world teetered and tottered in 2009, Barack Obama assured us that everything would be fine. He refused to offer specifics, claiming that the next day Timothy Geithner would offer his plan. The markets waited breathlessly as the next oracle walked with President Obama. Mr. Geithner has his usual confident stroll, with one hand in his pocket and his other hand motioning in an authoritative gesture to convey calm, steady, knowledge.

Then Mr. Geithner offered his plan in front of the cameras. The markets sank like a stone as everybody from Main Street to Wall Street thought the impossible. Timothy Geithner, golden boy of  Goldman Sachs, was an absolute dope.

He remains a dope. That is the best one can say about a man who cheats on his taxes because he cannot figure out Turbotax. Either he is a thief and a liar or a dope. The former would result in prison except Goldman Sachs employees are above the law. Therefore, the latter is the story.

Three years later, and Mr. Geithner is rewarded for failing to turn the economy around by being begged to keep his job. His boss is smart enough to know that it is better to keep Mr. Geithner and let Republicans pound him than let him go and have Mr. Obama get the blame he deserves.

At the risk of deriding all academics, some questions need to be asked of these people during the job interview process. Interviews can be conducted in a “brass tacks” kind of manner.

“Put your resume away. Enough with your credentials and experience. Your suit and tie are not going to get you the job, nor is your winning smile. I have three questions for you. Do you know anything? Do you know how to do anything? Have you ever done anything?”

When the applicant offers a confused look followed by nodding their head in the affirmative (that means up and down for liberals who went to Harvard), ask them to elaborate. Watch them try to get a definition of the meaning of words like “anything,” “something,” and “nothing.”

Either we do this, or we keep relying on pedigrees. The result is people like Barack Obama who don’t know anything, don’t know how to do anything, and have never done anything. When problems hit, they are deer frozen in the headlights.

We hired a million dollar smile as president and he hired another million dollar smile wearing quality slacks to be his top financial deputy. The markets eventually scowled. They don’t want likable dunderheads with pieces of parchment conveying book smarts in a grade inflated, curved world. The markets want results.

eric

The Tygrrrr Express is Iowa bound. 10 days of festivities in Iowa presidential politics await, including the debate and the Iowa Straw Poll. Today I am flying from Los Angeles to Omaha, Nebraska. Just across the border is Council Bluffs, Iowa. I will be speaking at a rally as part of the Herman Cain Common Sense Bus Tour. Then later in the evening in the same part of town I may be speaking to the Pottawattamie (really fun to say by the way) County GOP Central Committee.

Meanwhile, Standard and Poors has finally downgraded the Obama presidency to junk status.

http://communities.washingtontimes.com/neighborhood/tygrrrr-express/2011/aug/7/s-p-downgrades-obama-presidency-junk-status/

eric

Awhile back I made my presidential announcement. I announced that I was considering a run for the White House.

Then I announced my presidential exploration. This meant that I was exploring a run.

I leave on Monday for Iowa. I will be at the debate and the straw poll, but I will not be participating in either as a candidate because I have not decided to run. I am attending the debate to hear the questions asked so I can determine if I would want to answer them. I am attending the straw poll because I like barbecue. The best barbecue will help me determine who my most toughest challengers would be.

At some point will come a presidential decision. Until then, today is dedicated to my presidential platform should I decide to run.

Initially I was very leery about offering a platform. After all, some guy got elected in 2008 without anybody knowing what his platform was. He was tall, had good hair and a winning smile, and crisp shirts and neckties. He was also a minority, as am I. So perhaps a platform will not be needed.

I grew up in the 1980s watching MTV, and I remember when Randee of the Redwoods ran for president. He he even had a campaign song entitled “Just say whoa!”

As he pointed out in an interview, it is a bad idea to have a platform. People may like you but then decide not to vote for you just because they don’t like your platform.

The current president clearly understands this. He can wave and smile with the best of them.

Yet as a country music star sings, “You’ve got to stand for something or you’ll fall for anything.” So against the advice of unpaid political advisers disguised as people offering useless unsolicited opinions, Here is my presidential platform.

1) Cut taxes

2) Kill terrorists

That’s it.

For those who need elaboration on the first one, “cut taxes” is short for “Shut the hell up, cut my (redacted) taxes you corrupt useless b@stards and get the hell out of my life.”

Kill terrorists can also be explained as “gratuitously blow sh*t up, screw collateral damage, destroy everything knowing some of them will be terrorists.”

I could tell America that other ideas are being fleshed out, but that is not true. Trying to do too much at once means doing everything badly. So after cutting taxes and killing terrorists the only thing left to do would be to put my feet up on the desk and make sure a picture is taken of me lighting a victory stogie.

That concludes the rollout of my presidential platform. While it is obvious I would win if I ran, there are other considerations. People who run face scrutiny, and I detest scrutiny. It’s nobody’s d@mn business that I may or may not have disclosed or undisclosed peculiar habits. Elaboration is not needed since I have not decided if I am running.

I will make a formal decision before Labor Day or whenever I d@mn well please, whichever comes last.

eric

Obama supporters do not like it when their god is poked fun at. Here is some hate mail from his birthday supporters.

http://communities.washingtontimes.com/neighborhood/tygrrrr-express/2011/aug/5/mr-obama-your-birthday-supporters-need-hug/

eric

Happy 50th birthday Mr. Obama. Your AARP card is in the mail, along with information from Colonial Penn Life Insurance.

http://communities.washingtontimes.com/neighborhood/tygrrrr-express/2011/aug/4/mr-obamas-3580000-birthday-present/

eric aka the Tygrrrr Express

More ideological bigotry from liberal carpetbombers who refuse to see conservatives as human beings.

http://communities.washingtontimes.com/neighborhood/tygrrrr-express/2011/aug/3/ideological-bigotry-more-liberal-carpetbombers/
eric

The epilogue to the debt ceiling deal.

http://communities.washingtontimes.com/neighborhood/tygrrrr-express/2011/aug/1/dissecting-debt-ceiling-budget-deal/

eric