Archive for December, 2009

Ideological Bigotry Part XXIV–Maureen Dowd’s Sexual Temper Tantrum

Monday, December 21st, 2009

Today I am off to Fresno to headline their County GOP holiday party. Between Hanukkah, a nameless hot girl, and the Raiders beating the Broncos, I have been way too exceedingly pleasant lately. Time to put on my Hebrew version of the Grinch hat and get back to scorched Earth politics.

Water is wet. The sun rises in the East. Liberals on the Upper Westside of Manhattan delight in the scent of their own bottoms. The Jason Blair Times engages in Ideological Bigotry.

Whether it is Jewish self-loathing from Richard Cohen, a Bob Herbert racial temper tantrum, or Pinch Sulzberger giving away secret American troop movements, the Jason Blair Times is truly becoming a collection of raving lunatics in the Town Square. Their intellectual train has long since left the Union Station.

In the name of gender equality, Maureen Dowd fills the victimhood quota required by this long since scratched and broken record excuse of a media instrument.

This woman is so grating that when she tried to interview Khalid Sheik Mohammed, the ACLU stepped in on behalf of the poor sheik and reminded us all that the Eighth Amendment against cruel and unusual punishment protects him from torture. This is a shame because he was ready to say everything under the condition that she say nothing.

This woman is so vicious that she makes Cruella DeVille look like a Dalmation lover volunteering at the Best Friends Animal Sanctuary.

I don’t know what species her parents belonged to, but no wonder she love the Prius. She is definitely a hybrid of something herself.

(If a liberal were writing this, it would be considered satire and be given a Pulitzer. I could go on all day. Bring it on Maureen.)

Her latest sexual (or in her case perhaps asexual) temper tantrum is a screed against Sarah Palin.

I would link to the article but I wish to avoid innocent readers of my columns contracting swine flu from Miss Piggy’s more repulsive twin.

Her column entitled, “Visceral has its value,” was meant to be a slap at Sarah Palin. Maureen Dud calling somebody else visceral? Talk about the pot calling the kettle African-American.

Below is some of the filth she wallows in.

“It’s easy to dismiss Sarah Palin. She’s back on the trail, with the tumbling hair and tumbling thoughts. The queen of the scenic strip mall known as Wasilla now reigns over thrilled subjects thronging to a politically strategic swath of American strip malls.”

Wow, a cheap shot at a woman with gorgeous hair. Now that is what the feminist movement has brought us. Elizabeth Cady Stanton and Lucretia Mott are trying to come back to life so they can put either a muzzle or a feedbag on this creature. Betty Friedan is muttering to her friends that this witch needs to put a sock in it.

An entire town is nothing but a “scenic strip mall.” Now that is beautiful. Denigrate an entire town just to make sure one woman gets hit.

The town is not enough. Now everybody who goes to malls is in her snarling cross (nasal) hairs. Maybe had Black Friday shoppers in 1969 bought her lumps of coal, she could have used them to stuff her bra, snare a boyfriend, and have a family.

(Wow, doing her job is quite easy.)

Hell hath no fury like a she-beast scorned, as Stuart Schwartz ably points out.

So why does Maureen Dowd hate Sarah Palin with a passion and ferocity so blinding that it makes over-the-hill and kidding herself exotic dancer Katie Couric seem fair and reasonable?

Her contrast of Barack Obama to Sarah Palin reveals everything.

“He struggles to transcend identity politics while she wallows in them. As he builds an emotional moat around himself, she exuberantly pushes whatever she has, warts and all — the good looks, the tabloid-perfect family, the Alaska quirkiness, the kids with the weird names.”

Actually, he is identity politics, but that is for Bob Herbert’s next meltdown. Maureen Dowd hates Sarah Palin because Sarah Palin has virtually everything and Maureen Dowd has virtually nothing.

Sarah Palin is gorgeous. She is a former beauty queen. She was a successful jock and cheerleader. Boys want to date her. Yet despite needing administrative staff to send the declination letters on the deluge of marriage proposals, Sarah Palin is in love with her husband, and he is in love with her. They are happy.

Can anyone picture Maureen Dowd as a cheerleader?

“D-O-W-D-I-E, that’s the way we spell Dowdy, Dowdy, Dowdy, I’m Maureen and I’m Dowdy.”

The “tabloid perfect family” is a grudging admittance that the Palins are good parents. Those that dare go after Bristol Palin had better be prepared for a fusillade against Al Gore’s son.

Sarah Palin lives in a world of sock hops, campfires, and sing-a-longs. Maureen Dowd spent decades rotting away in a city that was rotting itself under drugs, crime, and sewage.

Sarah Palin is a conservative who succeeded. Maureen Dowd is a liberal who failed. Sarah Palin is authentic. Maureen Dowd is a fraud, although by New York Times standards, plagiarism is not fraud when done by a liberal.

All the protesting about how she does not need a man will not change the fact that she knows that she could never get a catch like Todd Palin. She would never even put the worm on the hook, for fear of chipping one of her typing nails. As for the kids with the “weird names,” Miss Dowd apparently has never met a Hollywood celebrity.

Some will correctly point out that Maureen Dowd is a failed human being living a menial life at a long since disgraced and discredited publication. Yet in the same way she advises that Sarah Palin cannot be ignored (She is starting to pursue Palin in a “Fatal Attraction” Glenn Close menacing kind of manner), Dowd must not go unchallenged. Idiocy is still dangerous when the platform is large.

(Perhaps the movie “American Beauty” offers a better theory. Maybe Dowd hit on Sarah Palin. Sarah rejected her, and Maureen went ballistic, targeting her as if she were Kevin Spacey.)

Dowd applies the platform logic to Palin.

Angry feminist pot, meet exploding hysterical kettle.

Maybe if NASA would land a man on Maureen Dowd, she would mellow out. We can even make “Maneater” by Hall and Oates her wedding march.

Never mind. KSM won’t date her. That pesky Eighth Amendment again.


NFL 2009–Week 15 Recap

Sunday, December 20th, 2009

Quoth football philosopher John Randall…This is when the big dogs come out.

While some have claimed that two unbeaten teams played this weekend, a third team played yesterday.

The league is Planet Social Sports. My team is “Kiss Da Baby,” formerly known as “Slamathon.” I am now a two time champion, and several of my teammates have five championships.

The theme for the week was “holiday.” Most of my teammates wore Christmas stockings and Santa Hats. Andrew looked like Santa, if Santa was a pirate, with one Santa leg, and one leg rolled down. I wore a blue and white Hanukkah shirt before the game.

As for the playoffs, this one was tougher than the last one. Last time it seemed everything came easy, even though we had to play 3 games as a Wild Card. This go round featured some close games in the regular season. Despite playing only two playoff games, it was grueling.

Our captain, Scotty Tecate, is leaving for Virginia. This was his final Saturday with the team. Our first playoff game was deadlocked 12-12 in the second half, when we decided to go for it on 4th down. Scotty went for the Hail Mary, and Chris Steck did an imitation of Chris Carter, outjumping double coverage for a miracle touchdown. We made the 2 point conversion (We go for 2 every time) and led 20-12. The opponents scored again, but we stopped the 2 point conversion to lead 20-18. Scotty methodically worked the clock, and despite a tough game all around, a final touchdown pass iced the 28-18 win and sent us to the finals.

In the championship game, we actually fell behind 7-0, and at the half were clinging to an 8-7 lead. Then something occurred that still has me shaking my head. Neighbors tried to have our game shut down. This is an official league, and we had every right to use the field. Our team was accused of drinking in the park. I do know that my teammates consume vast amounts of alcohol, but these ridiculous accusations led to some crusader threatening to call the police.

We refused to stop playing, since by the time the police would have arrived, the game would have been over. This is Los Angeles, and the LAPD has better things to do than harass people trying to play football in the park. I was drinking red Gatorade that teammate Brittany bought for me, so if the officers wanted to see my Gatorade I would have showed it to them.

These games had been delayed an entire week due to inclement weather. Yet neither rain or threats of police harassment from pathetic park crusaders were going to deny this team. A touchdown had us up 14-7, but the other team would not give up. They went for the tying touchdown, but Steck intercepted it by the goal line. Once again Scotty milked the clock, and a critical 4th down completion kept things moving. The score was more lopsided than the actual game, but we withstood a furious late rally and won 20-7.

Scotty retired after the game. So did I, but under questioning from Brittany, I already started waffling. Hey, not only do I debate more than Brett Favre, but I have two championships to his one.

While I may or may not be retiring from football, my sneakers are definitely being retired. In honor of Brett Favre, who plays for the Vikings, my sneakers are being given a Viking funeral. The soles have completely come off, and not even ductape can keep them together. They have ruined several pairs of socks.

Some may say they looked disgusting, but when you have a couple championships, everything looks gorgeous.

While nothing on Sunday reached the level of significance as Kiss Da Baby Saturday, the Colts and Saints tried to copy the 1972 Dolphins and 2009 Kiss Da Baby team by ending the season perfect.

The games speak for themselves. This is the Week 15 NFL Recap from my football palace in Los Angeles.

Indianapolis Colts      @      Jacksonville Jaguars was the Thursday night game. Despite locking up the # 1 seed, the Colts played their starters the entire game against a desperate Jacksonville team. The game itself was a thriller, with 8 lead changes and 0 punts by either team in the first three quarters. David Garrard was 23 of 40 for 223 yards and 3 touchdown passes. Peyton Manning was 23 of 30 for 308 yards and 4 touchdowns. Each quarterback was picked off once.

The first quarter started very slow. Garrard led a 13 play, 7 1/2 minute drive. On 3rd and 1 from the Indy 22, Garrarrd was sacked and fumbled. Jacksonville fell on the ball after a 10 yard loss, and Josh Scobee nailed a 50 yard field goal to have the Jaguars up 3-0. Manning came back with an even longer 14 play, 8 minute drive that extended into the second quarter. Manning hit Dallas Clark from 6 yards out. The Colts led 7-3, but the second quarter was about to become a track meet.

Garrard led the Jaguars right back with an 11 play, 6 yard drive that culminated in  a9 yard touchdown pass from Garrard to Maurice Jones-Drew to put the Jaguars up 10-7. Yet 13 seconds later Chris Simpson had the Colts back on top 14-10 with a 93 yard kickoff return. 10 plays and 5 minutes later, and the Jaguars were in front again. Garrard hit Lewis for 25 yards, and Jones-Drew ran it in from 3 yards out.

With only 3 minutes left in the half, Manning took over and hit Reggie Wayne for 22 yards and then Collie for a 23 yard touchdown and a 21-17 Colts advantage. There were 5 lead changes in the second quarter alone. A short kick had Jacksonville at their own 41 with 35 seconds left in the half. The Jaguars reached the Indy 39, but a 57 yard Scobee field goal attempt was no good as the half ended.

On the first drive of the second half Manning was intercepted, setting up Jacksonville at the Colts 39. On 4th and 1 from the 30, Jack Del Rio decided to go for it. Garrard snuck for the first down. On 3rd and 11 from the 16, Garrard hit Sims-Walker for the score and the 24-21 Jaguars lead. Manning came right back and hit Wayne for 21 yards on 3rd and 8, and then found Clark for the 27 yard touchdown to give the Colts the lead back at 28-24. A 43 yard kickoff return had the Jaguars starting at the Indy 46. Garrard hit Torry Holt for 17 yards, and Thomas for the 13 yard touchdown as the Jaguars led 31-28.

Seconds into the fourth quarter, Manning fired incomplete on 3rd and 3, and the game had its first punt. The pace slowed, and the Jaguars punted for the first time as well a couple of minutes later. Manning then led the Colts from their own 10 to the Jacksonville 43, but then moved backwards as the Colts punted again with 7 1/2 minutes left. Jacksonville from their own 7 went 3 and out, and the Colts had the ball on their own 30. On 3rd and 5 from the 35, Manning threw the bomb to Wayne, and the result was a 65 yard touchdown and the game’s 9th lead change. The Colts were up by 4 with 5 1/2 minutes left.

The Jaguars went nowhere, and with 2 1/2 minutes left Del Rio decided to punt and rely on his defense despite the game being a shootout. The Colts used only 25 seconds of clock, and the Jaguars got the ball back at their own 39 with 2:06 left. Garrard hit Holt for 14 yards, and on 3rd and 6 from the Indy 43, a surprise run call worked perfectly as Jones-Drew picked up 10 yards. With 1:05 left, on 3rd and 10 from the Indy 33, Garrard was intercepted. Despite playing well all game, one mistake was one too many against the undefeated Colts. Jim Caldwell has seen his Colts go to 14-0. As for whether they will rest players or chase history, we will know next week. 35-31 Colts

Dallas Cowboys      @      New Orleans Saints was the Saturday night game. Indianapolis scraped by to remain unbeaten, while the Saints were trying to do the same. The Saints at least were at home, and against a Dallas team that keeps being told it cannot win in December. Wade Phillips and Tony Romo are under fire, and Jerry Jones is on the verge of cleaning house. having to go on the road to face Sean Payton, Drew Brees, and the unbeaten Saints almost did not seem fair.

The Saints, like Indy and any other very good team, has won some games by the skin of their teeth with some dumb luck. A couple of weeks ago they trailed Washington by 7 points. Washington had a 23 yard field goal attempt to make it a 10 point game. That would have iced it. The only thing that was iced was the Washington kicker, who choked. The Washington defense then fell apart and the Saints escaped with a win. This game looked like a repeat as Dallas jumped on top early.

In a surprising beginning, the Saints went 3 and out. Then Romo took over, and heaved a 49 yard touchdown pass to Miles Austin for a 7-0 Cowboys lead. The Saints again went 3 and out and the Cowboys took over at their own 40. On 3rd and 5 Romo hit Roy Williams for 14 yards and then completed a 26 yard pass to Austin. When Marion Barber ran it in from 3 yards out, the Cowboys had a shocking 14-0 lead as the Saints had failed to make a first down.

The pace of the game slowed in the second quarter as Brees led a 12 play drive from the Saints 9 to the Cowboys 16. The drive went no further, as a field goal had the Saints on the board down 14-3. The Saints got the ball back at their own 10, and Brees led them to the Dallas 41 at the 2 minute warning. Brees then went deep and was intercepted. The Saints got the ball back again at their own 30 with 1:22 left in the half, when disaster struck. All game Brees was harassed by Spencer and Demarcus Ware. Ware went off the field on a stretcher last week, and he showed plenty of heart in this game. He forced a fumble and Spencer fell on it, setting up a field goal before the half and a 17-3 Cowboys lead.

The Cowboys took the second half kickoff and began at their own 26. Romo led a 13 play, 7 minute drive. When Marion Barber ran it in from 2 yards out, the Cowboys were cruising at 24-3. The Saints trailed Miami 24-3 and came back to win, but that was in the first half. This game was laready midway through the third quarter. The Cowboys still led 24-3 entering the fourth quarter.

Breees finally got going in the hurry up offense, hitting Thomas for 13 yards, Marques Colston for 15 more, and Thomas for another 18, setting up a one yard touchdown run by Bell. 12 1/2 minutes remained in regulation, and the Saints were within 24-10. The Cowboys returned the kickoff to their own 40, but failed to pick up a first down and punted. Brees then fired to Thomas for gains of 29 and 12, to Colston for 10, and to Moore for the 7 yard score. The Saints were within 7 points with 8 minutes still to play.

The Saints had all the momentum and the crowd was fired up. Yet Tony Romo, as he has done before, dug down deep. On 3rd and from the Dallas 23, the Cowboys were one play away from giving the ball back again. Instead Romo hit Austin for 32 yards and to Phillips for 23 more. The clock wound down, and with 2:19 to play the Cowboys faced 4th and 5 at the Saints 6. Much maligned kicker Nick Folk came in for a chip shot. For the second time in 3 weeks, the Saints were about to lose if a kicker could make a kick barely more than an extra point.

Nick Folk summoned up his inner Shawn Suisham and blew it. He doinked it right off the upright. Suisham has since been cut, and Folk may join him. To quote Paul Maguire, “I hate kickers. They should be paid $50 a game.” The Saints had life at their own 20. With 1:27 to go, the Saints faced 4th and 10. Brees hit Colston for 14 yards. With 38 seconds left, on 3rd and 5 from their own 39, Brees hit Thomas for 6 yards. With 12 seconds remaining, the Saints had reached the Dallas 42. Brees set up for the fantastic finish. Instead he was sacked by Ware, forcing a fumble that the Cowboys recovered to end the game.

Those that have been lambasting Phillips and Romo can sit down now. Phillips dialed up blitzes that harassed Brees all game. Romo finished 22 of 34 for 312 yards and one touchdown. Brees was 29 of 45 for 298 yards and one touchdown, and one interception. The Cowboys improved to 9-5, still in the hunt to win their division. The Saints were knocked from the ranks of the unbeaten, and at 13-1 still have Minnesota breathing down their necks. As Chris Berman keeps reminding us, “That’s why they play the games.” 24-17 Cowboys

Cleveland  Browns    @      Kansas City Chiefs–For some unknown reason this game was played. Sometimes bad teams can come together and play an exciting game. The theme this year is that this has not been happening. Yet like the earlier Cleveland game against Detroit, this game actually was exciting. Early on it was as dull as expected. When the teams exchanged field goals to make it 3-3, it appeared that those who predicted a scoreless game were wrong. Even more stunning was the fact that this first half turned into a ridiculously exciting game. The Browns do have one exciting player, as Joshua Cribbs did it again. A 100 yard kickoff return had the Browns up 10-3. Early in the second quarter Phil Dawson connected on a 30 yard field goal as the Browns led 13-3.

The Chiefs stormed back in the second quarter. Matt Cassel found Chris Chambers for a 9 yard touchdown as the Chiefs got to within 13-10. Jamal Charles then ran for a 47 yard touchdown as the Chiefs led 17-13. Then a fumbled special teams play  by the Browns gave the Chiefs a gift touchdown and a 24-13 lead. Studebaker fell on the ball in the Cleveland end zone for the Chiefs. Yet just when the game had completely swung, it swung back. Joshua Cribbs is insane. He bested his 100 yard return with another one, this time from 103 yards. The Browns may have no offense, but the Chiefs seem to have no special teams coverage. The Browns were down 24-20 in this game of monster big plays.

The third quarter featured more rapid moves as Jerome Harrison ran for a 71 yard touchdown to put the Browns back in front 27-24. Harrison had 200 yard rushing after 3 quarters and was not done. In the fourth quarter Brady Quinn led an 14 play, 79 yard drive with large doses of Harrison eating up 8 minutes of clock. In the red zone Harrison was stopped on 3rd and 1, but Eric Mangini decided to go for it before the Walrus, Mike Holmgren, comes in and fires him. Brady Quinn faked the pitch, and picked up the first down and more. Harrison then ran it in from 10 yards out to give the Browns up 34-24 with 12 minutes remaining in regulation. A 33 yard pass fro Matt Cassel to Chris Chambers led to a 27 yard Ryan Succop field goal as the Chiefs got to within 34-27 with 8 minutes left.

With 4 1/2 minutes left, a 52 yard field goal attempt by Phil Dawson was just short as it remained a one score game. From their own 42, Cassel fired to Chris Chambers. It bounced off his hands into the hands of Dwayne Bowe for a 23 yard gain. On 4th and 6 from the 12, Cassel hit Bradley for the touchdown to tie the game 34-34 with 2:20 to play. Cleveland took over t their own 30. On 3rd and 1 from their own 39, Brady Quinn scrambled for 24 yards. On 3rd and 1 from the Chiefs 28, Harrison ran for the touchdown with 52 seconds remaining. Harrison finished the day with 286 yards rushing, just shy of the NFL record. Kansas City took over at their own 19, and Cassel fired 33 yards to Bradley. With 7 seconds left, Cassel threw the Hail Mary from the Cleveland 26. It fell incomplete, and the Browns won an exciting game. 41-34 Browns

Atlanta Falcons      @      N.Y. Jets–The Falcons were eliminated the day before, and were on the road against a New York team fighting to stay alive in the playoff chase faced off. Matt Ryan, who like Tom Brady has two first names and no last name, is an non-descript white guy the Falcons are glad to have back from injury. The Falcons took the ball right down the field, but on 3rd and goal at the one, Snelling got stoned. Mike Smith, an average non-descript white guy who looks like a guy named Mike Smith, opted for the field goal. Neither Shawn Suisham or Nick Folk are his kickers, and the 24 yard kick was good as the Falcons led 3-0. Yet Mark Sanchez came right back, as a 65 yard touchdown bomb to Braylon Edwards had the Jets up 7-3. The Falcons had the ball for over 11 minutes in the first quarter yet trailed.

In the second quarter the Jets blew a chance to extend the lead on a short field goal. Backup quarterback Kelly Clemens was the holder, and he fumbled the snap and then got blasted. Any further description of the second and third quarters would be unfair to the game of football as Rex Ryan saw his defense maintain the 7-3 Jets lead into the fourth quarter. Between a missed field goal and a fumbled snap, the Jets tried a new way of failing to extend the lead late when a high snap led to a blocked field goal as the score stayed unchanged with 4 1/2 minutes left in the game.

The battle of who wanted it least did lead to an exciting finish in an otherwise dreary game. Ryan led the Falcons to a first and goal at the Jets 6 at the 2 minute warning. On 4th and goal, with everything on the line, Ryan fired the touchdown to Tony Gonzalez as the Falcons now led by a field goal with 1:38 to play. Sanchez was the intercepted to seal the Jets fate as both teams are now 7-7 and the jets are on life support. 10-7 Falcons

Miami Dolphins      @      Tennessee Titans–A pair of teams clinging to playoff life faced off as the 7-6 Dolphins took on the 6-7 Titans. Vince Young began with a pass into coverage that was batted around by 3 players before being intercepted on an acrobatic tip drill. This led to a field goal and  a 3-0 Dolphins lead. Young quickly rebounded, and an 81 yard, 10 play drive was capped off with Young hitting Justin Gage for a 22 yard touchdown and 7-3 Titans lead.

In the second quarter a promising Miami drive was wasted when Ricky Williams got blasted in the red zone and fumbled. Chris Johnson ripped off big gains on the ground in his quest to reach 2000 yards, but the drive stalled inside the Miami 10 yard line. In a year of terrible field goal kicking, Rob Bironas barely snuck a 27 yard field goal inside the upright as the Titans led 10-3. Miami came back down the field, but Chad Henne could not get them past the 10 yard line, and another field goal had the Dolphins within 10-6. Yet Vince Young came right back, again going to the end zone for Justin Gage. Despite perfect defense, Gage made the acrobatic 21 yard touchdown reception as the Titans led 17-6.

In the third quarter Young went to the end zone to Nate Washington, who hauled in the 32 yard touchdown to give the Titans a comfortable 24-6 lead. Comfortable did not last. Miami kicked a field goal to trail 24-9 entering the fourth quarter. With 12 1/2 minutes to play, Jeff Fisher decided not to gamble on 4th and 1 from the Miami 42. Miami took over at their own 20. Chad Henne led a 12 play drive. He hit a 19 yard completion to Ted Ginn, and Miami then faced a critical 4th and 2 from the Tennessee 29. Henne hit Haynos for 10 yards. Henne hit Fasano for 18 yards, and Ricky Williams ran it in from one yard out to make it 24-16.

The Titans punted again, and Miami took over at their own 10 with 4 1/2 minutes left. On 3rd and 1 from the 19 Henne hit Camarillo for 10 yards. On 3rd and 7 from the Miami 32, Henne went deep to Hartline for a 57 yard gain to the Tennessee 11.  On 3rd and 7 from the 8, Henne hit Camarillo for 6 yards. On 4th and 1 from the 2 with 1:38 to play, Tony Sparano made the easy decision to go for it. Anthony Fasano scored the touchdown to pull the Dolphins within 24-22. Ricky Williams scored the 2 point conversion out of the Wildcat to make it 24-24. The teams went to overtime.

3 plays into overtime Henne was intercepted, again reminding those who complain about the overtime rules to pipe down. The Titans took over at the Miami 27, ran 3 conservative runs for a loss of one yard, and brought Rob Bironas in for the 45 yard field goal attempt. He made it. Both of these teams are 7-7 with playoff hopes, an amazing feat considering that the Titans began 0-6 and the Dolphins started 0-3. 27-24 Titans, OT

New England Patriots     @      Buffalo Bills–In a piece of irrelevant trivia, I went to graduate school with Patriots fans Kevin Nelson, Patrick Todd, and Michael Paul. Like Tom Brady, they all have two first names and no last name. The Patriots lead the division by one game against a Bills team that is shockingly not mathematically eliminated from the playoffs. Even more shocking was that the Bills came out and rammed it down the Patriots throats with a ridiculous 14 play, 69 yard, 9 1/2 minute drive. On 3rd and goal from the 3, a touchdown was nullified by a false start penalty. These are the Bills. A field goal had the Bills up 3-0.

Tom Brady was intercepted, but on the next New England series Brady went deep to Randy Moss in double coverage. Defensive pass interference placed the ball on the Buffalo one yard line. After offensive pass interference moved the Patriots back, Brady fired to Moss again, who made a toe tapping catch in the back of the end zone for a 13 yard touchdown to get the Patriots the 7-3 lead. At the 2 minute warning Brady went to the end zone again, this time for Wes Welker. Again, the Bills got flagged for defensive pass interference. On 3rd and goal from the one, Lawrence Maroney banged it in to put the Patriots up 14-3 with 24 seconds left in the half. The Bills did have a very long field goal attempt but Ryan Lindell hooked it as the half ended.

In the third quarter the Patriots simply ground down the Bills with basic, textbook smashmouth. Stephen Gostkowski nailed a 30 yard field goal to put the Patriots up 17-3 with 5 minutes left in the third quarter. In the fourth quarter Ryan Fitzpatrick was benched and Trent Edwards entered. Edwards sparked Buffalo by taking a sack but being lucky enough to have a defensive facemask penalty called on New England. This is offense in Buffalo. Edwards got injured and was carted off. Fitzpatrick came back in to get sacked some more. Finally with 3 minutes left Fitzpatrick hit Lee Evans for a short touchdown to get the Bills to within 17-10. The Bills recovered the onsides kick but were offsides.

With 2:08 to play, the Patriots faced 3rd and 6 at their own 32. Brady hit Wes Welker for 8 yards, allowing New England to run out the clock. The Patriots have a virtual strangehold on the division. 17-10 Patriots

Arizona Cardinals      @      Detroit Lions–Arizona missed a chance to wrap up their division, but playing against Detroit was supposed to be the tonic. Detroit fumbled the ball deep in their own territory, and Kurt Warner threw a short jump ball to Larry Fitzgerald, who made the juggling catch to have the Cardinals up 7-0. Dante Culpepper played for the injured Matthew Stafford, and Culpepper threw a perfect pass to Rogers-Cromartie, who plays defense for Arizona. That set up Tim Hightower from one yard out to make it 14-0. Arizona added a field goal to lead 17-0 at the break. Dante Culpepper was benched in favor of 3rd string Drew Stanton.

One deserved criticism of the Cardinals is their inability to finish games. They had a golden opportunity to turn out the lights in the third quarter. Instead, Warner was picked off by Delmas, who returned it 100 yards the other way to get the Lions to within 17-7. In Detroit, that is considered offense. The Lions got the ball back, and needed only one play and 11 seconds. Maurice Morris ripped off a 64 yard touchdown run and the Lions trailed only 17-14. Detroit did get the tying field goal at 17-17, and the only question would be which team would give the game away in the fourth quarter.

Shockingly enough, the Lions immediately wilted after tying the game. Warner moved the team 75 yards, with an 18 yard touchdown by Wells to put the Cardinals back in front 24-17. The Lions punted, but Steve Breaston fumbled it to set up the Lions at the Arizona 17.  With 9 1/2 minutes left, the Lions faced 4th and 1 at the 8. They ran up the middle and got stuffed, turning it over on downs. Again, each team tried their best to lose.

The Lions got the ball back with 8 minutes at their own 42. On 3rd and 2 from midfield, Stanton hit Calvin Johnson for 24 yards. On 3rd and 2 from the 18, Stanton hit Nordin for 12 yards. Stanton took it himself the final yard to tie the game 24-24 with 3:48 to play. A strong kickoff return had Arizona at their own 42. Warner hit Fitzgerald for 13 yards, and Wells ran for 34 to the Detroit 11. On 3rd and 4 from the 5, Warner hit Anquon Boldin as the Cardinals retook the lead at the 2 minute warning. The Lions turned it over on downs as the Cardinals escaped, all but locking up the NFC Worst division. 31-24 Cardinals

Houston Texans   @   St. Louis Rams–Somebody somewhere cared about this game. The Texans kicked a field goal, and the 3-0 lead may have appeared to be enough to lock up the victory over the hapless Rams. The Rams trailed 6-3 in this scintillating game as the fans demanded their money back with interest. With Marc Bulger and Kyle Boller injured, the Rams are playing their 3rd string quarterback, whose name fittingly is Null. Yet Null was not null on this day as a 2 yard touchdown pass to Danny Amendola actually had the Rams up 10-6. Bob McNair is going to fire Gary Kubiak if the Texans lose this game.

Matt Schaub did lead the Texans 83 yards in 10 plays over 5 1/2 minutes in the third quarter. A 3 yard touchdown pass to Walter had the Texans up 13-10. Josh Brown nailed a 52 yard field goal to tie the game 13-13. With 8 minutes to play the Texans had the ball on their own 9. From the 14 Schaub went deep to Andre Johnson for a 30 yard gain. On the very next play Schaub went back to Johnson for a 44 yard gain. The drive bogged down and on 4th and 8 from the 10 Kris Brown nailed a 28 yard field goal to give the Texans the lead with 4 1/2 minutes to play. With 2:40 left, facing 4th and 10 near midfield, Gary Kubiak decided to punt and rely on his defense. On 3rd and 1 from the 24, Ryan Moats picked up 2 yards to run out the clock and get the Texans to 7-7. 16-13 Texans

Green Bay Packers      @      Pittsburgh Steelers–Green Bay started 4-4 but has since won 5 straight, while Pittsburgh began 6-2 and then inexplicably lost 5 straight. this was one of the finest games of the year as both offense lit up the scoreboard, the teams combined for over 900 yards of offense. Aaron Rodgers was 26 of 48 for 383 yards, and that was not even the best performance as Big Ben Roethlisberger threw for a staggering 503 yards. Both quarterbacks threw for 3 touchdowns without an interception, and the game was thrilling from the first play to the eerily similar final play.

One play and 10 seconds into the game, Big Ben went deep to Mike Wallace for a 60 yard touchdown as the Steelers led 7-0. Aaron Rodgers came back with an 83 yard touchdown pass to Greg Jennings in a pinball machine game that had not even begun to get ridiculous as only 5 minutes had elapsed. Roethlisberger, who does not celebrate Hanukkah because he is not Jewish, then led a 10 play, 6 minute drive. A 2 yard run by Rashaard Mendenhall had the Steelers up 14-7. Late in the first quarter, facing 3rd and 10 from their own 27, Rodgers hit Donald Driver for 49 yards. Yet early in the second quarter, a field goal attempt missed.

Midway through the second quarter, a field position game set up Green Bay just shy of midfield. Aaron Rodgers ended up scrambling for a 14 yard touchdown to tie the game 14-14. With 3 minutes left in the half, the Steelers took over at their own 20. On 3rd and 5, Roethlisberger threw 27 yards to Heath Milelr and 33 yards to Santonio Holmes to the Green Bay 15. A 10 yard touchdown pass to Mewelde Moore with 30 seconds left in the half had the Steelers in front again at 21-14.

4 minutes into the 3rd quarter, with the Steelers facing 3rd and 8 at their own 28, Roethlisberger hit Hines Ward for 25 yards. Willie Parker picked up a pair of 9 yard gains on he ground and then Big Ben hit Ward for 17 more yards to the 14. A touchdown pass tp Mendenhall was nullified by offensive pass interference, and the Steelers settled for a field goal and a 24-14 lead with 4 minutes left in the 3rd quarter after the 11 play, 6 minute drive. The Packers took over at their own 31 as Rodgers led a 13 play, 6 minute drive that extended into the fourth quarter. On 3rd and 16 from the 25 Rodgers hit Driver for 19 yards. On 3rd and 6 from the 11 Rodgers hit Finley for the touchdown as the Packers got to within 24-21 with 13 1/2 minutes left in the game.

The Steelers took over at their own 37 and hit Ward for 29 yards, leading to a field goal and a 27-21 Steelers lead with 10 minutes to play. The Packers took over at their own 38 and came right back. Rodgers hit Nelson for 27 yards and then Ryan Grant ran for a 24 yard touchdown. The Packers had their first lead of the game at 28-27, yet 7 1/2 minutes still remained in a game that was nowhere near finished. The Steelers faced 2nd and 18 at their own 23 when Big Ben fired a 54 yard bomb to Ward. With 4 minutes to go Josh Reed nailed a 43 yard field goal as the Steelers led 30-28. Then a very controversial decision was made.

The Steelers led by 2 points wit 4 minutes left, when Mike Tomlin decided to go for a surprise onsides kick. On the surface this decision seemed insane. Nobody does this. Tomlin reasoned that Rodgers was carving up his defense, and that the Packers were going to score again. If they had a short field they would score quicker, giving the Steelers the ball with enough time left for one drive. This “let them score” strategy does not sit well with me, although technically the Steeleres were playing defense. The onsides kick was recovered by Pittsburgh but was touched before it went 10 yards. The Packers took over at the Pittsburgh 39, and on 3rd and 14 from the 24, Rodgers hit Jones for the touchdown. The 2 point conversion succeeded, and the Packers led 36-30. With 2:01 to play, Pittsburgh took over at their own 14.

With 1:14 to play, facing 4th and 7 at their own 22, Big Ben fired to Holmes for 32 yards to the Green Bay 46. On 3rd and 15 from their own 44, Big Ben hit Heath Miller for 20 yards at the Green Bay 36 with 32 seconds to play. Roethlisberger was sacked on the next play, but defensive holding nullified the play and stopped the clock, but only after 8 seconds had elapsed. Roethlisberger then hit Miller for a 15 yard gain to set up 1st and 10 at the Green Bay 19 with 18 seconds to play as the Steelers took their final timeout. A pair of incomplete passes later set up one final shot with 3 seconds to play. On defensive stop meant a 6 game win streak for the Packers and hope for their division crown and first round bye, and a 6 game losing streak from the Steelers and playoff elimination.

Instead the game ended exactly as it begun. In a play eerily reminiscent of Holmes’s winning toe tap Super Bowl winning catch, Roethliberger fired to Mike Wallace, whp somehow got both feet down with control of the ball for the miracle finish. A blocked extra point would have meant 36-36 and overtime, but the kick was good and the Steelers had won a thriller 37-36 to get to 7-7 and stave off elimination. The onsides kick decision did not end their season, although Tomlin will still face questions about it. The Packers will not win their division but are in strong wild card contention, while the Steelers still have life. For fans everywhere, this is why we watch football. 37-36 Steelers

San Francisco 49ers  @ Philadelphia Eagles–This was one of two games that was moved from an early game to a late game due to a snowstorm. A San Francisco team clinging to the faintest of playoff hopes traveled to face a Philly team hoping to move closer to locking up their division. The Eagles went right to work, as Demps returned the opening kickoff to midfield, and Donovan McNabb threw a 19 yard touchdown pass to Deshean Jackson to quickly get the Eagles up 7-0. Alex Smith did lead the 49ers in position for Joe Nedney to kick a 51 yard field goal to get San Francisco within 7-3.

Andy Reid is an excellent coach, but the main weakness for the Eagles under his tenure is the lack of a bruising running back to pick up 3rd and 1. Late in the first quarter he brought in Michael Vick to try and pick it up, which failed. Then on 4th and 1 from his own 29, Andy Reid lost his mind and turned into Barry Switzer. In 1995, in a game between the Dallas and Philadelphia tied 17-17 late in the fourth quarter, Dallas Coach Switzer gambled on 4th and 1 from his own 29. Emmett Smith got stuffed by the Eagles defense, allowing Philadelphia to kick the winning field goal 20-17. This time Philadelphia was gambling, and again it failed. Luckily for the Eagles, the 49ers fumbled the ball right back at the Philly 6 yard line.

McNabb then needed only 5 miutes to move the Eagles 94 yards. A 43 yard pass to Captain Morgan Brent Celek led to a 3rd and 7 at the San Francisco 8, where McNabb scrambled for the touchdown himself to put the Eagles up 14-3. Alex Smith was then intercepted, setting up the Eagles at the San Francisco 28. The Eagles failed to convert on 3rd and 5 form the 10, but a defensive penalty gave the Eagles 1st down at the 5. As expected, Andy Reid tried one run for only one yard, gave up on the run, and a couple of incomplete passes later a field goal had the Eagles up 17-3. With 36 seconds left in the half, Smith was intercepted again, setting up the Eagles at the San Francisco 29. McNabb fired 21 yards to Avant to set up David Akers for the chip shot field goal just before the half to have the Eagles cruising 20-3.

The 49ers had life when a long kickoff return had the starting the second half at the Philly 43. On 4th and 3 from the 36 Mike Singletary decided to go for it, and Smith hit Morgan for 22 yards. Yet on 4th and 3 from the 7, Singletary opted for the field goal as the 49ers pulled to within 20-6. McNabb was then promptly intercepted, setting up the 49ers at the Philly 35. On 4th and 5 from the 30, Singletary again went for it rather than attempt the field goal. Smith hit Vernon Davis for 15 yards, and then went to Morgan for the 12 yard touchdown to make it a 20-13 game.

Yet seconds into the fourth quarter, with the Eagles facing 3rd and 2 at their own 19, McNabb went deep to Deshean Jackson for a 59 yard gain. The Eagles faced 2nd and 1 from the 2, and a run failed. Yet for once Andy Reid stuck with the run, and McCoy ran it in to lock up the victory. The 49ers were eliminated form playoff contention while the Eagles at 10-4 have a one game lead in their division and even still have an outside shot at a first round bye. 27-13 Eagles

Chicago  Bears    @      Baltimore Ravens–This was the other game that was moved from morning to afternoon due to the Eastern snowstorm. When a bad team plays on the road at a good team, the potential upset usually does not occur. Joe Flacco was 21 of 29 for 234 yards and 4 touchdown passes while Jay Cutler was 10 of 27 for 94 yards and 3 interceptions. The statistics did not lie in this case as Lovie Smith saw the misery of the Bears continue.

Cutler’s first interception set up the Ravens at their own 48. Ray Rice picked up 28 yards and Flacco hit Todd Heap for a 14 yard touchdown and 7-0 Ravens lead. Cutler moved the Bears to the Baltimore 14 but was then intercepted again. Ray Rice ripped off another 28 yard gain, and Flacco hit Heap for 20 yards and then for the 7 yard touchdown to make it 14-0 and end any suspense.

In the second quarter Cutler led a staggering 19 play, 8 1/2 minute drive. Yet 3 cracks from the one yard line produced a failed run inbetween a pair of incomplete passes as the Ravens, perhaps not what they once were on defense, had the goal line stand. The victory was short lived as the Ravens punted out of their own end zone, and Bennett returned it 49 yards for a touchdown. This is what the Bears count as offense, as they were within 14-7. With 1:21 left in the half Billy Cundiff missed a 30 yard field goal that would have extended the lead. Despite dominating the Ravens only led by one score at intermission.

The Ravens slammed the door shut on both sides of the ball in the second half. Flacco threw a 32 yard touchdown to Williams to make it 21-7. The Bears fumbled the ensuing kickoff, allowing the Ravens to take over at the Chicago 29. An 18 yard touchdown pass to Derrick Mason had the Ravens coasting at 28-7 only 5 minutes into the second half. The Bears went into hibernation weeks ago, and the Ravens soon followed in the rest of this game, with only one more field goal adding to the lack of excitement. The Ravens at 8-6 are only one game back in their division, and in a strong wildcard position. The Bears are who we thought they were. 31-7 Ravens

Oakland  Raiders    @      Denver Broncos–For more on the game of the day, go to

The Raiders are out of the playoffs with their 7th straight losing season, while the Broncos seemed in good position at 8-5. Last year the Raiders went into Denver and shocked the Broncos 31-10 to help knock them from contention and end the Shanahan reign. Yet Tom Cable has been saddled this year with a dreadful regressing JaMarcus Russell. At 2-8, Cable relegated Russell to the bench, and Bruce Gradkowski came in and sparked the team. Yet Gradkowski went down with an injury, forcing Russell into a game last week where he nearly singlehandedly helped the team lose. Russell was so far in the doghouse that Cable announced 3rd string Charlie Frye as the starter, and even drafted JP Losman from the UFL’s Las Vegas Locomotives. As long as Russell did not play, the Raiders had a chance.

The Raiders went 3 and out, and Kle Orton led the Broncos on a 10 play drive from the Denver 35. With the Broncos facing 2nd and 4 from the Oakland, Orton gained only one yard. On 3rd and  from the 6, the Silver and Black came up big on defense, stopping Knowshon Moreno for a one yard gain. On 4th and 2 form the 5, Josh McDaniels opted for the field goal and a 3-0 Denver lead.

Charlie Frye was then intercepted, setting up Denver at the Oakland 41. Orton then hit Marshall for 24 yards down to the 17. Again the defense stiffened with a sack of Orton and the Broncos settled for a 43 yard field goal and a 6-0 lead. As is typical of the Raiders, the defense played hard, and the slightest hint of offense was all they asked for. In the second quarter they got it.

From the Oakland 34, Frye scrambled for 26 yards to the Denver 40. On 3rd and 5 from the 35, Frye hit Johnny Lee Higgins for 12 yards. On the next play Michael Bush ran for a 23 yard touchdown and the Raiders had the 7-6 lead. Denver punted, and the Raiders took over at their own 35. A roughing the passer penalty had the Raiders near midfield. On 3rd and 6 from the Denver 48, Frye hit Louis Murphy for 7 yards. On 4th and 6 from the 37, Cable brought in Sebastian Janikowski for a 54 yard field goal. Seabass drilled it as the Raiders led 10-6.

Denver punted again, and the Raiders took over with 5 1/2 minutes left in the half at their own 28. On 3rd and 9 from the Oakland 39, with the Broncos expecting pass, Michael Bush picked up 13 yards on the ground. From the Denver 44, Frye hit Murphy for 14 yards, and Bush ran for 13 more to the 17 with 1:14 left in the half. Yet on 3rd and 3 from the 10, the Raiders missed a golden chance to do some damage before the half.  Frye fired incomplete and Seabass nailed a 28 yard field goal as the Raiders led 13-6 at halftime.

The Broncos started the second half at their own 20, and Orton led them in 12 plays to the Oakland 33. The defense stiffened again, but Prater nailed a 51 yard kick as the Broncos were within 13-9. Midway through the third quarter Darren McFadden and the Broncos recovered at midfield. Orton hit Marshall for 19 yards, and then tossed the  yard touchdown to Marshall as the Broncos led 16-13 with 4 minutes left in the third quarter. As always, all the defense asked was that the offense not give the game away.

The Raiders took over at their own 11 and then exploded on the ground. Bush picked up 18 yards, and on the next play he rambled for 40 yards to the Denver 31. Darren McFadden then ran for 28 yards to set up 1st and goal at the Denver 3. 79 yards on 3 running plays meant that the Raiders should keep it on the ground, which Cable rightly did. Bush picked up one yard on first down and 1 yard on 2nd down to set up 3rd and goal at the 1. Cable decided to run it again, but instead of ramming Bush straight ahead, he sent Bush off tackle. This was a mistake, and the Broncos blew it up in the backfield for a 2 yard loss.

On 4th and goal from the 3, Cable decided to go for it. This was mind boggling. The Raiders were down by 3 on the road on the first play of the fourth quarter. I give Cable all the credit for wanting to win, but the tying field goal with a defense playing well made sense. Going for it did not. Cable did call a very good play, and Frye faked left and pitched it to McFadden right. Yet the speedster took it inside rather than go wide outside. McFadden was stopped inside the one, and the Broncos had their goal line stand and the lead.

On 3rd and 1 from the 10, Orton failed to run for the 1st down, and Cable’s strategy appeared to work in terms of field position until a booming punt had the Raiders taking over at their own 40. From the Denver 48, with 11 minute to play, disaster struck when Frye got blasted and was slammed to the ground. Te hit appeared legal, and with everything on the line, the worst of all possible worlds occurred as JaMarcus Russell had to come in to the game. JP Losman had just joined the team earlier in the week, so even Russell was deemed a better option. The team immediately faded, and a promising drive went backwards. The Raiders punted, and Denver took over at their own 19 with 9 1/2 minutes to play.

On 3rd and 7 from the 33, Orton hit Stokely on a short pass as Stokely raced into the open field. He was eventually run down on a touchdown saving tackle after 63 yards, but the Broncos had 1st and goal at the 2. The decision not to kick the field goal loomed large for the Raiders, as their defense again needed to step up. Again they did. A pair of incomplete pass sandwiched around Moreno getting blasted for a 1 yard loss led to a field goal. The Broncos led 19-13 with 6 minutes to play in regulation. The Raiders had hope, but the final 6 minutes were going to be a war of attrition. JaMarcus Russell was being asked to lead a win.

Naturally Russell failed, and the Raiders went 3 and out. Denver got the ball back with 4 minutes left as Cable decided to rely on his defense, which had been stout when needed. The defense sacked Orton, as the Broncos used only 30 seconds of clock. The Raiders took over at their own 38 with 3 1/2 minutes to play. Russell was then sacked and fumbled. The Raiders fell on it for a 13 yard loss for 2nd and 23. This is JaMarcus Russell. The Raiders needed a miracle to overcome Russell’s ineptitude, and they got one. A deep pass to Murphy was incomplete, but defensive pass interference led to a 32 yard gain to the Denver 43. There was enough time for the Raiders to run the ball and not let Russell throw anything.

Russell fired incomplete on 1st and 2nd down, but on 2nd down Russell got rocked. For the first time in my life, as much as it pains me, I wanted him to stay down. I wished him no harm, but did not want him to play any more. JP Losman came into the game. With no preparation, no reps, and no chance, Losman was asked to come in on 3rd and 10 with 2 1/2 minutes to play. Losman fired incomplete before getting belted. He finally got up, but with 4th and 10, Cable had a decision to make. Gradkowski tried to walk on 2 bad knees, and Charlie Frye insisted he could remember his own name and point to his nose while suffering the concussion. Not a chance. Cable chose Russell over Losman.

Russell hit Stewart for 11 yards to the Denver 32. The Raiders were alive at the 2 minute warning. Russell hit Stewart for 9 yards and Chaz Schillens for 13 more as Denver took a timeout with one minute remaining and the Raider facing 1st and goal at the 10. Russell fired incomplete on 1st down and completed a 4 yard pass on 2nd down. Yet illegal contact on the defense gave the Raiders 1st and goal at the 5. The Raiders returned the favor with a false start. From the 10, Russell fired incomplete on 1st down but on 2nd down hit Schillens for the touchdown. In front of a shocked Denver crowd that celebrated the win the moment Russell took the field, the Raiders led 20-19 with 35 seconds remaining as Seabass nailed the extra point.

Denver got the ball at their own 22, and Orton was sacked for a 7 yard loss on 1st down as Denver took their final timeout. This was key a Denver faced 4th and 15 at their own 17 with 13 seconds left. Orton heaved a 39 yard pass to Tony Scheffler, who caught it between 3 defenders at the Oakland 46. Yet Denver was out of timeouts, and before a Hail Mary could be attempted, the clock ran out. The Raider had pulled off a shocker.

I still say that JaMarcus is the 3rd best, and maybe even 4th best, of the Raiders quarterbacks. He absolutely must sit the moment another qb is healthy, so he can learn and develop. There is a ray of hope for him, and this game showed that he is not a lost cause. Yet it was the defense that saved the day repeatedly, as the Raiders have won 3 of 4 games, mostly without Russell. Tom Cable deserves a ton of credit for keeping this team together in the most brutal of circumstances. This truly was one of the all time great wins for the Raiders in this bitter rivalry. 20-19 Raiders

Cincinnati Bengals      @      San Diego Chargers–A pair of very good teams played an even better game. The Bengals, already reeling from the loss of the wife of defensive coordinator Mike Zimmer, had to deal with the tragic death of troubled Chris Henry, under very suspicious circumstances. If the 9-4 Bengals could go on the road and beat the 10-3 Chargers, the Bengals would have the inside track on the #2 seed and 1st round bye. The Chargers were looking to place a stranglehold on the # 2 slot. Carson Palmer was 27 for 40 with 314 yards and 2 touchdowns ans one interception. Philip Rivers was 24 of 38 for 308 yards and 3 touchdowns with 2 interceptions.

Darren Sproles ran the opening kickoff to the San Diego 45, and a pair of 3rd down conversions by Ladanian Tomlinson led to Rivers hitting Antonio Gates for a 3 yard touchdown and 7-0 Chargers lead. 12 plays and 6 minutes later Palmer had the Bengals at the San Diego 8 yard line, but they got no further, settling for a field goal and a 7-3 game. In the second quarter, from the San Diego 49, Palmer went deep to Chad Johnson for the touchdown. As the Bengals led 10-7, Johnson went to both knees and prayed, and then cried on the sidelines over his fallen teammate Johnson.

Rivers was then intercepted, but the Bengals did not capitalize. With 3 minutes left in the half, Rivers hit Vincent Jackson for a 21 yard touchdown to put the Chargers back on top 14-10. With 3 minutes left in the half Palmer moved the Bengals from their own 18. A 27 yard run by Larry Johnson and passes of 20 and 9 yards to Laverneous Coles had the Bengals on the move. The Bengals could not get past the 7 yard line, and a field goal as the half ended had the Chargers on top 14-13.

Midway through the third quarter Palmer was intercepted, setting up the Chargers at the Cincy 40. Rivers then hit Vincent Jackson for a 34 yard touchdown to give the Chargers a 21-13 lead. The Bengals then punted, and a short pass from Rivers to Tomlinson went for 27 yards to set upa  Nate Kaeding field goal and a 24-13 Chargers advantage. Yet in the fourth quarter it was the Bengals that clawed back.

Rivers was intercepted early in the fourth quarter, setting up the Bengals at the San Diego 33. Chad Johnson ran for 26 yards, and Palmer hit Coles for the 2 yard touchdown. The 2 point conversion succeeded, and the Bengals were within 24-21 with a full 12 1/2 minutes to play. San Diego bled 5 minutes of clock and then  punted. Palmer moved the Bengals methodically down the field, but disaster struck in the red zone with 2 1/2 minutes left. Facing 1st and 10 at the San Diego 19, a false start was followed by a fumble that resulted in a 20 yard loss. 2nd and 36 became 3rd and 30. Palmer hit Cosby for 23 yards to make it 4th and 7. The tying field goal was good with 57 seconds left. Yet the Bengals scored too early.

From the 20, Rivers hit Sproles for 11 yards and Jackson for 20 more just past midfield. 15 more yards from Rivers to Floyd set up Kaeding from 52 yards out with 8 seconds remaining. With a 1st round by likely on the line, Kaeding drilled it. Bengals players cried over their fallen teammate, and their valiant effort to get the win for him. San Diego has won 9 straight, and Norv Turner is getting closer to being removed from the Dick Jauron/Dave Wannstedt/Ray Rhodes overrated list. Yes the Chargers are built to win, but they are winning. They pretty much have the # 2 seed, while the Bengals only have a one game lead in their division. 27-24 Chargers

Tampa Bay Buccaneers     @      Seattle Seahawks–The Seahawks are a bad team, but at home against an even worse team signaled a win. The game was even worse than expected, with results not expected. Apparently the Seahawks are convinced that the Walrus Mike Holmgren is going to Cleveland because they did not play with fear or urgency. Matt Hasselbeck was intercepted 4 times.Jon Gruden is still in the Monday Night Football booth, which is bad for both teams needing leadership. Josh Freeman was intercepted, and Hasselbeck fumbled it right back.

Seattle did manage to reach 4th and goal at the 4, but fumbled the snap on the field goal attempt and this awful game stayed scoreless. In the second quarter Raheem Morris decided not to gamble when the Buccaneers faced 4th and 1 at the Seattle 19. The field goal was no good, and 0-0 looked like a potential final score. With 4 1/2 minutes left in the half Hasselbeck hit Carlson for a 29 yard touchdown as the Seahawks led 7-0 in a game where that score might hold up. With one minute left in the half, the Seahawks faced 3rd and 14 at their own 28. Rather than run and punt, Hasselbeck was intercepted, allowing the Buccaneers to kick a field goal and trail 7-3 at the half.

The Buccaneers took the second half kickoff and moved 10 plays in 6 minutes, with a 45 yard field goal getting them within 7-6. Hasselbeck was then again intercepted deep in his own territory. From the Seattle 22, Josh Freeman needed one play and 8 seconds to throw the touchdown pass to  Cadillac Williams to put the Buccaneers up 13-7. Seattle went backwards and punted, with a strong return setting up the Buccaneers at the Seattle 37. On 3rd and 10 Freeman his Stroughter for 16 yards, and then hit Stroughter again for 9 yards on 3rd and 7. On 3rd and goal from the 6 Freeman hit Ward for the touchdown. The 2 point conversion had the Buccaneers up 21-7. The 4th quarter saw the Buccaneers add another field goal as the Bucs got their second win and the Seahawks reverted back to the Seahags. 24-7 Buccaneers

Minnesota Vikings     @      Carolina Panthers was the Sunday night game. Minnesota had clinched their division with the Green Bay loss, and were in a strong position for the # 2 seed, with a chance to even get the top seed and home field throughout with the New Orleans loss. They were playing a desperate Carolina team fighting for survival at home.The first 3 quarters were a defensive bonelock.

In the second quarter, Matt Moore, playing for an injured Jake Delhomme, led a 15 play, 8 minute drive that covered 71 yards. Moore hit Hoover from one yard out for the touchdown. The extra point was blocked as the Panthers led 6-0. A field position game eventually had the Vikings starting a drive at the Carolina 41. Adrian Peterson ran it in from 4 yards out to have the Vikings leading 7-6 at halftime. A scoreless 3rd quarter in a brutal game was magnified by controversy on the Minnesota sideline and magnified by the media.

Despite leading 7-6, Brett Favre was getting knocked around. In what may be an unprecedented move, Coach Brad Childress, who is Catholic and bald, benched the left tackle. Another left tackle came in with similar results. Childress even talked to Favre about coming out of the game, and Favre insisted on staying in. The media blew this up into a battle for control of the team, but last week it was the Randy Moss non-scandal and this week it was the Favre-Childress non-event. Childress coaches the team, and had he absolutely ordered Favre to sit that would have been it. Favre has never been benched in his career other than to keep him healthy in a lost cause, and while he is needed for the playoffs, the Vikings were winning this game.

Yet while Minnesota is loaded with superstars, John Fox has a superstar on his team as well, in the form of all world receiver Steve Smith. Seconds into the fourth quarter the Panthers were facing 3rd and 26 from the Minnesota 42. Moore went deep to Smith for a 42 yard touchdown. The 2 point conversion failed but the Panthers led 12-7. Despite playing well all game, the Minnesota defense had a critical breakdown. Minnesota then punted, and the Panthers offense came alive. From their own 23, Jimmy Stewart picked up 23 yards. On 3rd and 4 from the Minnesota 48, Moore again went deep to Smith, this time for a 45 yard gain down to the 3. Stewart ran it in, and the extra point had the Panthers up 19-7 with 9 1/2 minutes to play.

The Vikings punted again, and the Panthers took over at their own 20. On 3rd and 9, Moore hit Smith for 16 yards. From the 40, Moore went deep, this time to somebody who was not Steve Smith. Barnidge caught the 55 yard gain at the Minnesota 5.  On 3rd and goal at the 3 Moore hit Stewart for the touchdown to ice it with 3 minutes left. Favre tried to rally Minnesota, and the first play from scrimmage was a short pass to Adrian Peterson that he took for a 63 yard gain down to the Carolina 16. On the next play, a rushed Favre underthrew a ball that was intercepted in the end zone.

After the game Favre pointed out that while the Vikings had lost 2 of 3, a lot of teams in the league would like to be 11-3, including the team that beat them. Those that are trying to show this as Favre fading down the stretch like last year fail to grasp that last year he was injured. This year he is healthy. Also, Percy Harvin was injured and sat out this game. When he gets healthy the Vikings will have as good a shot as anybody to win it all, and Childress knows this. The Vikings are are all but unable to win the top seed in the NFC, and are only one game ahead of Philadelphia for the # 2 seed. However, they have clinched their division. As for the Panthers, they are alive at 7-7, as they and Jon Fox fight to survive. 26-7 Panthers

N.Y. Giants      @      Washington Redskins was the Monday night game.The Giants had everything to play for, and the Redskins did not. Both teams played like it, as this game was over from the start. Eli Manning led the Giants on a 16 play, 80 yard, 9 1/2 minute drive that ended when Ahmad Bradshaw banged it on on 3rd and goal from the 3 to put the Giants up 7-0. The Redskins punted, and the Giants then moved 11 plays in 5 minutes. Bradshaw ran it in from 4 yards out as the Giants led 14-0 seconds into the second quarter.

At that point the Giants had run 27 plays to only 3 for Washington. The giants started their next drive in Washington territory, but Manning was sacked on 3rd and 7 from the 10. A field goal had Big Blue up 17-0. On the next drive Manning went deep to Hakeem Nicks for 45 yards to set up Manning to Smith from 5 yards out to make it 24-0. The Redskins still had 0 first downs and negative yardage at this point. The Redskins did get deep near the end of the half, but on the last play, rather than kick a field goal, Jim ZOrn opted for a fake that fooled nobody and was intercepted.

In the third quarter Jason Campbell hit Cartwright for a 51 yard gain to set up an 11 yard toss to Davis as the Redskins finally got on the board. The extra point was blocked as the Redskins were down 24-6 and got no closer. The Giants came right back as Manning hit Hagan for a 23 yard touchdown pass to make it 31-6. Campbell was then intercepted by Thomas, who took it 14 yards for a touchdown to have the Giants romping at 38-6. Ganther scored on a one yard run to make it 38-12, but Manning came back in the fourth quarter with a 25 yard touchdown mass to Manningham, his third touchdown pass of the day. Tom Coughlin has the Giants clinging to playoff hopes at 8-6, one game behind Dallas for the final spot. 45-12 Giants


Bench the players and keep the coaches

Saturday, December 19th, 2009

Sunday is about the games. Pontificating can be done on Saturdays, not while the games are being played. Nothing supersedes the games.

With that, several National Football League issues are being discussed this week.

First up is the quest for immortality and history.

The 1972 Miami Dolphins are the only team to go unbeaten and untied for an entire season including the playoffs. They finished a perfect 17-0.

This year the Indianapolis Colts and New Orleans Saints both reached 13-0.

(The Colts have since gone to 14-0 while the Saints play today.)

The issue is one of rest vs rust. The Saints have not clinched home field yet, but the Colts had done so with 3 weeks to play.

So what does a team do?

First let’s change the equation slightly. Let’s say the team has clinched home field, but have lost a game. They can be 12-1 or 13-1. In this case, the choice is simple.

(Grabbing a bullhorn): Bench Everybody.

This is the biggest no-brainer in football. You sit your stars down, give them clipboards and headsets, and hide their helmets if need be. There is no way you risk an injury in meaningless games.

The notion of rust is nonsense. College players go an entire month between their last game and their bowl game. It is the job of the coaching staff to get the players prepared.

It does not hurt the integrity of the game for players to rest their starters. It also gives backups a chance to get vital playing time so that if they are needed in the playoffs, they will have had some reps.

People love to point to the 2005 Colts, who rested starters and then got knocked around at home to Pittsburgh. This argument is weak. The Colts did start 13-0 but knocked around at home by San Diego in the regular season with their starters. Also, Pittsburgh knocked out several teams on the road in the playoffs.

A better example would be the 2004 Eagles. They started 13-1, clinched home field, and Andy Reid rested everybody. They lost the final two regular season games. It did not matter, as they reached the Super Bowl and nearly won it.

Bench the players, and get everyone healthy.

Yet when the team is unbeaten, everything changes. History does matter. The problem is that emotion has to be taken out of the equation. The goal is not to be the best team ever. It is to be the best team in the one calendar year the team is playing. History is for barflys to debate.

The goal in the NFL is to win Super Bowl rings. If a 9-7 team can win it all, they are every bit as much a champion as a 15-1 team.

Yet winning is about being the best. The 2007 Patriots did not lose the Super Bowl from exhaustion. They simply faced a tough defense and a resilient group, including a once in a lifetime reception on a guy’s helmet.

If the team has a chance to go 16-0, they really face incredible pressure to do it. It is less simple to bench everybody. If the team has already lost, sit them all. If they are unbeaten, let them go for perfection.

One columnist wrote a column that is good overall, but it has one line that makes me ill. This columnist simply takes things too far. He says it in parentheses, but it still bothers me from an integrity standpoint.

“(And if losing to one team knocks a more dangerous potential opponent out of the playoff picture, that’s okay too, as long as your purpose is to help yourself.)”

This is not ok. Playing backups is not the same as throwing a game. The best example of this is the 1976 Oakland Raiders. In 1974 and 1975, the Raiders lost to the Steelers in the AFC Title Game. The Steelers collected the rings. In 1976, the Steelers began 1-4. They then caught fire and won 9 straight to finish 10-4. The Raiders were 12-1, and had locked up home field. They were playing the Bengals on Monday Night Football. If the Bengals won, they were in the playoffs, and Pittsburgh was out. If the Bengals lost, the reverse was the case. Pundits suggested that the Raiders would purposely lose to avoid Pittsburgh.

This enraged Coach John Madden and his players. The Raiders had a reputation for dirty play, but that was to win. They never cheated the game itself. Madden and the Raiders went out and dismantled Cincinnati, knocking them home for the year. As the game wund down, the fans chanted “We want Pittsburgh.” In the 1976 AFC Title Game the Raiders beat up the Steelers and then won the Super Bowl.

This made the 1976 Raiders true champions, with no questions swirling. Questions swirling can be found in the 1995 Cowboys, who were lucky enough to face the Packers and not the 49ers. The 2006 Colts did it the hard way, beating New England.

Bench the players, but fight to win with your backups. Anybody not trying his best is dishonoring the game and should sit down.

This brings us to JaMarcus Russell.

It was one thing for Russell to be benched for the backup. Bruce Gradkowski is now on injured reserve, and Russell is sitting in favor of 3rd stringer Charlie Frye. The team has even picked up JP Losman, who failed with the Bills but won a championship in the United Football League with the Las Vegas Locomotives, coached by Jim Fassell.

This is big. This is an earthquake in the land of the Silver and Black.

Either Al Davis gave the order, or Tom Cable made the decision and Davis backed him. Either way this is positive. It all comes down to passion.

Al Davis, whether one loves or hates him, is football obsessed. The Raiders are his life. Those that want to rake him over the coals for drafting Russell should read the media columns at that time. Everybody believed in Russell. I certainly did. He was the only logical choice. Quarterbacks are always a gamble, but a necessary one.

In 1999 Donovan McNabb was a winner and Akili Smith was a bust. The year earlier gave us Peyton Manning and Ryan Leaf. The Chargers got lucky with Philip Rivers only after failing with Leaf, missing out on Eli Manning, and getting rid of Drew Brees. Manning has a ring and Brees is closer to getting one than Rivers. Al Davis would have been insane to not draft Russell.

As for Tom Cable, he clearly has passion. Yes he has off the field issues, but the players have rallied around him. When Gradkowski was in there the team was much improved. Cable wants to keep his own job, and he inherited Russell. He is fighting.

Russell has never fought. He held out, showed up late and overweight, and was considered lazy in practice. Gradkowski was screaming at guys in the huddle, and backing it up. Russell was benched for playing badly, but being behind Charlie Frye is a message that either he shows he cares, or he is done. There is no room in football or anywhere else in life for those who will do anything less than go all out all the time.

Russell is not the biggest quarterback bust in NFL history. Leaf was worse, because the Chargers gave up draft picks in addition. Yet while the Raiders have not won lately, sitting Russell shows to me that the team wants to win. Tom Cable deserves a full season without Russell. As for Russell, he can still come back. Vince Young and Alex Smith came back. Yet until he shapes up physically and from an attitude standpoint, he sits.

This brings us to the coaches. Every year teams want to fire coaches. This is usually also insane. Blowing up a program does not make sense unless there is no room for improvement.

The article has 8 coaches on the hot seat, and does not include Jim Schwartz of the Lions or Steve Spagnuolo of the Rams. Both of these coaches inherited dreadful teams. Surprisingly, Jim Mora Jr. of the Seahawks is not on the list. He should be on the hot seat.

In my mind only two coaches can be fired with justification. Raheem Morris inherited a 9-7 Buccaneers team that has won only one game this year. Yes the Bucs lost 4 straight to end things last year, but Jon Gruden won much more than he lost. This brings me to a rule.

Never ever fire a coach after a winning season. Never. Yes, teams underachieve. The 1994 Raiders went 9-7 and Art Shell was fired in a move that Davis still considers one of his biggest mistakes. I would add not giving Shell more time his second go round. Wade Phillips is fighting for his coaching life in Dallas. This is crazy. Underachieving teams should be given time to fix things. Dallas went 13-3 a couple of years ago.

Coaches that have had good seasons should be allowed to have bad seasons. Bill Cowher of the Steelers was allowed to have his bad seasons. So was Jeff Fisher of the Titans. Continuity is good for organizations. The Bengals are now being rewarded by sticking it out with Marvin Lewis.

This is why firing Jon Fox of the Panthers or Jack Del Rio of the Jaguars (not on the list) makes no sense. They have both had 12-4 seasons. Lovie Smith went 13-3 and reached a Super Bowl, as did Fox. The Bears are injury wracked on defense. Firing any of these guys is nuts.

The Chargers fired Marty Schottenheimer after going 14-2. Norvelous Norv Turner has them winning, but they are not going 14-2. Winning seasons means the coach stays.

Jim Zorn and Gary Kubiak of the Redskins and Texans are fielding competitive teams. The players are fighting hard.

You fire the coach only when you see that the team is clearly headed in the wrong direction. The only two teams that can say that are the Bucs and the Cleveland Browns. Eric Mangini has seen the team regress, as was the case with the Jets when he coached them.

Yes, if you have a chance to get a superstar like a Mike Holmgren or Bill Cowher or you do it, but remember that they had tough seasons as well. The Sainted Bill Parcells is 5 for 5 with reclamation projects, but he had awful losing seasons as well in the beginning, going 3-12-1 with the Giants and 1-11 to start with the Patriots in the respective first seasons.

Speculation has Mike Shanahan replacing Jim Zorn, Bill Cowher replacing Jon Fox, and even Jim Fassell replacing tom Cable (Fassell coached JP Losman in the UFL). I love jim Fassell, and have wanted him to coach the Raiders for some time. Yet unless you can get a superstar, leave things alone.

Also, give the coaches more power. Bill Parcells has said that you can’t be expected to bake the cake if they don’t let you buy the groceries. Let the coaches have the time to get rid of the players that hurt the team, and draft better players.

Bill Cowher was given 15 years to win a Super Bowl. He came so close so many times, and the Rooneys understood that he was worth the wait. Give a coach 5 years. As long as the team slowly improves, give them the time.

Peyton Manning may look like a coach on the field, but he took his orders from Tony Dungy and now Jim Caldwell. That is how it should work.

Keep the coaches, and let them decide when to bench the players, for good or bad reasons.


Indianapolis Colts      @      Jacksonville Jaguars

(Colts by     6.5, they win but fail to cover)

Dallas Cowboys      @      New Orleans Saints

(Saints by    7, they cover)

Cleveland  Browns    @      Kansas City Chiefs

(Browns by    2, upset special, Chiefs win outright)

Atlanta Falcons      @      N.Y. Jets

(Jets by    6, they cover)

Miami Dolphins      @      Tennessee Titans

(Titans by    3, they cover)

San Francisco 49ers      @      Philadelphia Eagles

(Eagles by    8.5, they cover)

New England Patriots     @      Buffalo Bills

(Patriots by    7, they win but fail to cover)

Arizona Cardinals      @      Detroit Lions

(Cardinals by    11.5, they win but fail to cover)

Green Bay Packers      @      Pittsburgh Steelers

(Steelers by    1, they cover)

Chicago  Bears    @      Baltimore Ravens

(Ravens by    10, they cover)

Houston Texans     @      St. Louis Rams

(Texans by    10, they win but fail to cover)

Oakland  Raiders    @      Denver Broncos

(Broncos by   13, they win but fail to cover)

Cincinnati Bengals      @      San Diego Chargers

(Chargers by    6.5, they win but fail to cover)

Tampa Bay Buccaneers     @      Seattle Seahawks

(Seahawks by    7, they cover)

Minnesota Vikings     @      Carolina Panthers

(Vikings by    7, they win but fail to cover)

N.Y. Giants      @      Washington Redskins

(Giants  by  3, they cover)


Hanukkah Epilogue–Jewish Republicans Everywhere

Friday, December 18th, 2009

As Hanukkah 2009 enters its 8th and final night, I just want to pay tribute to Jewish Republicans everywhere.

Too many people think that being Jewish and being a Republican are incompatible. This is totally false. The greatest good deed in Judaism is Tzedakah, which means charity. The highest level of charity is helping somebody become self sufficient by starting their own business. Judaism and political conservatism are a perfect match.

There are many more Jewish Republicans than people think. The problem is that Republican Jews are the new gays. Too many of us are in the closet.

Well today I offer a loud tribute to Jewish Republicans helping make America better all across this nation.

Linda Lingle is the Governor of Hawaii.

Norm Coleman and Rudy Boschwitz were both Senators Minnesota.

Eric Cantor is the House Minority Leader in Virginia.

Adam Hasner is the House State Majority Leader in Florida.

Dan Lederman is an influential South Dakota legislator.

Gary Emineth is the Chairman of the North Dakota Republican Party

Howard Epstein is the Chairman of the San Francisco Republican Party.

Jeff Wald is a vital member of the Oakland-Alameda County Republican Party.

Ari Fleischer was the White House Press Secretary for President George W. Bush, helping us all heal as Rosh Hashanah came shortly after 9/11.

Florence Shapiro is running for the Senate in Texas.

Joel Pollak is running for Congress in Illinois.

Josh Mandel is running for Secretary of State in Ohio.

Ari David and Mattie Fein are both running for Congress in separate Los Angeles districts.

Evan Sayet is the most influential Republican comedian in the country.

Larry Greenfield of the Claremont Institute honored Ronald Reagan in Berlin on the 20th anniversary of the falling of the Berlin Wall.

Sam Fox of Missouri was the U.S. Ambassador to Belgium.

Dennis Prager, Michael Medved, Dennis Miller, Marc Levin, and Alan Stock are influential radio talk show hosts in America, located in Los Angeles, Seattle, Los Angeles again, New York and Las Vegas.

Bernie Goldberg is the top media critic in the nation.

Sir Charles of Krauthammer remains the finest mind on Earth.

Campbell Brown of CNN converted to the Jewish faith to marry a Jewish Republican.

Norman Podhoretz has capped off his brilliant multi-decade career with the book “Why are Jews liberal?”

John Podhoretz has honored his father’s legacy from the New York Post to Commentary Magazine.

Bill Kristol sets the journalistic standard of magazine excellence with the Weekly Standard.

Mona Charen has a long and successful career as a writer and author.

Dr. Daniel Pipes runs the Middle East Forum, tracking Islamofascism worldwide.

David Horowitz runs the Freedom Center, tracking Islamofascim on college campuses.

Richard Baehr in Illinois of the American Thinker is one of the most respected political analysts and health care consultants in the country.

Sheldon Adelson is a casino magnate in Las Vegas.

Leo Bletnitsky in Las Vegas helped with the Republican Party Animals.

Joe Gelman in Las Vegas is a very respected blogger of the Neocon Express, one of the top 2 blogs in America with the word “Express” in it.

Susan Duclos out of Phoenix is the brilliance behind the blog Wake Up America. She goes by the name Spree.

Mande Wilkes blogs at Fits News out of South Carolina.

Ben Shapiro is a rising columnist, author, and attorney.

Lynn Lechler has helped the Republican Party with her service in Pennsylvania.

Andy Levy offers “Redeye,” the lighter side of life, from New York.

Andrew Breitbart of Los Angeles broke the ACORN story through his site Big Hollywood.

Burt Prelutsky is a successful television writer who wrote for MASH and many other shows.

Roger L. Simon is the brains behind Pajamas Media.

Jonathan Hoenig runs Capitalist Pig Asset Management from Chicago.

President George W. Bush had many Republican Jews in his administration.

Paul Wolfowitz was the Assistant Secretary of Defense.

Douglas Feith was the Under Secretary of Defense.

Elliott Abrams was the Deputy National Security Director for Middle East Affairs.

Michael Mukasey was the Attorney General.

Michael Chertoff was the Director of Homeland Security.

Josh Bolton was the director of the Office of Management and Budget.

Scooter Libby was the Chief of Staff for Vice President Dick Cheney.

Henry Kissinger was the Secretary of State for President Richard Nixon.

Federal Reserve Chairmen Alan Greenspan and Ben Bernanke have both faced tough challenges.

Milton Friedman was the brightest economist the world has ever known.

Comedian Jackie Mason has entertained people for decades.

Comedian and Actor Adam Sandler has written many versions of his now famous Hanukkah Song.

Comedian Julia Gorin is as tough as she is funny.

Actress Stephanie Zimbalist starred in Remington Steele with Pierce Brosnan.

Actor Ron Silver left us way too soon.

Ben Stein has been an actor, writer, and even game show host.

The Republican Jewish Coalition started as a dream, and is now a thriving organization with chapters all over America.

Israel has had some phenomenal Likud Prime Ministers, from Menachem Begin to Yitzchak Shamir to Ariel Sharon to Benjamin Netanyahu.

Lastly, there is lil ol’ me. The Tygrrrr Express is more than just a blog and the conduit to the book “Ideological Bigotry.”

When all is said and done, I am a Jewish Republican.

Happy Hanukkah and beyond to the Jewish Republicans of the world, and all of those who show solidarity with us.

Hineni. Here I am. Republican, Jewish, and proud always.


Hanukkah Night 7–Lighting Candles, Smacking Women, and Clubbing Men

Thursday, December 17th, 2009

No column has offended people more than my 2007 Hanukkah Column “Light a Candle, Smack a Woman.” Luckily the people that were offended are people that need to be offended. Therefore, I am running it again with 2009 Updates.

What is not to like about Hanukkah? We get to play with fire. It’s like July 4th, except we smacked around Brits instead of Greeks.

Speaking of smacking around, nothing has changed since Hanukkah 2007 except the date. So below I offer Hanukkah tips with 2009 updates on when it is perfectly acceptable to slap around women.

Fresh from a ton of parties on the seventh night of Hanukkah, I now need to prepare for partying on the eighth night. I love this holiday. Since I do not drink alcohol, smoke tobacco, or do drugs, I will stick with my vice of choice…women.

2009 Update: I have spent the first few nights in Sedona, Lake Havasu, and San Francisco, barely dipping my toes into Los Angeles, Phoenix, and parts of Nevada. Judaism is not recession proof, and Bernie Madoff did not help matters. The social calendar in New York and Miami will have to wait until March.

Sticking with women, one of the reasons Judaism is seen as “weak” by outsiders, and why Jewish men are seen as “momma’s boys,” is because our religion emasculates men. Of course we call it “celebrating women,” but it is out and out emasculation of men. We have holidays specifically dedicated to the power of women.

That is another reason to love Hanukkah. It is pure male testosterone. We came, we saw, and we conquered. We kicked some rumpus. Pure military force allowed the Maccabees to just smack around the enemy like they were women in need of a good backside slap.

For those of you wondering why out of nowhere I am deliberately advocating the denigration of an entire gender, just relax, the twist is coming any sentence now.

Ever since the feminist mistake, women have been up in arms looking for ways to exact vengeance on the male gender. It was supposed to be about the right to vote, and equal work for equal pay. Now it is about attempting to destroy men. Unfortunately for the radical feminists (redundant, I know), they are cannibals. They eat their own. They betray each other. They do more to commit violence against their fellow females than most men ever could.

Therefore, in the spirit of Hanukkah, I will describe 8 situations where it is perfectly acceptable to abuse women physically, sexually, or psychologically, one for each night. You can take these women and paddle their backsides, and there will be no consequences, unless gratification is a consequence. Do not worry about the feminists getting angry, which is how they normally go through life. They will allow this abuse to happen. So for those of you out there looking to abuse women, here are the eight acceptable situations.

1) The male sexual predator has to be politically liberal. Ted Kennedy and Bill Clinton have carte blanche to abuse women. If the woman ends up dead, it is acceptable, provided that the abuser is pro-choice on abortion. Of course they will be pro-choice, because that way they can be irresponsible and be able to get rid of the evidence. If abortion is not the way to get rid of the evidence, driving over a bridge is plan b. Kathleen Willey and Paula Jones…sorry ladies. The feminists do not care. Anita Hill? No evidence required. Republicans do not get this exemption, even if they are pro-choice. Sorry Bob Packwood.

In fact, the NOW announced that Bill Clinton should be praised because after he tried to get lewd with Kathleen Willey, he did not try a second time. He took no for an answer. Therefore, every man in America gets one free chance to cop a feel.

2009 Update: Eliot Spitzer gets an exemption as well a year later. Not only is he wealthy limousine liberal that rails against the wealthy, but he paid for the sex. Therefore, implied consent from Ashle Dupree renders any rumpus whacking to be obligatory. For $5,000 an hour, I might let Spitzer hit me on the @ss for 6 minutes to get $500 bucks. Ashlee Dupree is now a  New York Post columnist, another reason to love that paper.

2) The woman can be a beauty pageant contestant. They are fair game for being violated. Feminists hate beauty queens, due to obvious jealousy. Angry women have more wrinkle lines. Desiree Washington alleged rape against Mike Tyson, and I do not recall any feminist groundswell.

2009 Update: Sarah Palin became the subject of a porn movie called “Nailin’ Palin.” Let’s see Caroline Kennedy be featured in a movie called “Being Mrs. Schlongberg,” and see how funny liberals find it. Every feminist in America that can’t stand being significantly uglier than Sarah Palin inside and outside should get a slap on their rump until they apologize for their vitriol towards the wonderful human being that is Sarah Palin. Carrie Prejean and Stevie Rivenbark have also been abused by “tolerant” leftist bullies.

3) The woman must be politically conservative. Radio djs recently advocated raping Laura Bush and Condoleeza Rice. Stone cold silence. I can advocate taking a paddle to Hillary’s badonkadonk and believe you me the secret service will have something to say about it as soon as they find out what a badonkadonk is.

2009 Update: The “abort Palin” t-shirts were another example of high brow liberal sophistication and wit.

4) Poor and/or ugly women are not given the same protection as attractive women, provided the women are not too attractive as to be in a beauty pageant. If a woman is considered hideously ugly, a man can abuse her because nobody would believe that he would be interested anyway. If the man is considered handsome, then the case is closed. There is no way Bill Clinton could have raped Juanita Broderick. He is considered pleasing to look at, while she is not.

2009 Update: Anybody vile enough to have an adult video of Michael Moore giving a spanking to Rosie O’Donnell should be ashamed of themselves. Whoever you are, you disgust me for even bringing it up.

5) Muslim women can and should be beaten as often as possible. From Detroit to Dubai, from Afghanistan to Zambia, the feminists condone the brutal beating of Muslim women. The feminists really struggle with this one, because they want to be against male violence towards women, but those who abuse the Koran for their own evil purposes also tend to hate republicans, especially George W. Bush. Besides, if they succeed in destroying America, and we become part of the Caliphate, there will be no republicans left. If some women get beaten in the process, such collateral damage is part of a greater good.

2009 Update: Some women were brutally murdered in Mumbai last year. “The Stoning of Soraya M was a powerful story of the abuse women face under Radical Islam. Feminists kept silent in both cases. Normally this would be a good thing, but the one time they should unshut their traps, they say nothing.

6) Non-Muslim women in Muslim nations are entitled to 40 lashes at a minimum. Any woman that allows a teddy bear to be named Mohammed should know better. The feminists of America will not speak up to save her. They will treat her as if she smoked tobacco or caused global warming. To get an exemption, one has to submit to Islam and denounce all republicans, primarily George W. Bush. This how Nancy the Pelosiraptor escaped her lashes. She wore a Burkha, sipped Tea with Assad, and denounced the tyranny of an American President.

2009 Update: Women in Afghanistan are now free from beatings. Liberals would rather condemn George W. Bush and erase his Presidency, allowing these women to get spanked harder than the Pelosiraptor did recently by Obama and Rahm Emanuel. They called the show “Charles in Charge,” not Charlene in Charge.

7) Prostitutes can be beaten. Feminists will go insane when some radio shock jock refers to women as “nappy headed hos.” Some feminists will even criticize music that refers to women as b*tches and hos. Ironically, these same feminists will not stick up for actual hos getting pimp slapped by…well, pimps, I guess. It could be because prostitutes tend to be attractive, and feminists despise women who succeed by being pretty and offering sexuality, whether they be strippers, call girls, etc. Besides, many women have lost their men to these women. Once Hugh Grant cheated on Elizabeth Hurley, aka proof that perfection exists, no woman was safe anywhere.

Before going further, all people are prostitutes. I am a corporate slut. I will not compromise my principles, unless there is money in it for me. I sold out to the establishment for money, and got a decent haircut. The old joke is quite true. A man asks a woman if she will sleep with him for a million dollars, and she says that she would. The man then asks if she would for $10. She responds that she is not a hooker. The man explains to her that, “we’ve already established that you’re a hooker, now we’re just negotiating the price.”

2009 Update: Ashle Dupree is getting no love from the feminists. She got tossed under the bus faster than the male hooker running a prostitution ring out of the house of Barney Frank, and the other male boyfriend running the drug ring out of Barney Frank’s house.  Now if Eliot Spitzer was caught having sex with Barney Frank…no, never mind. The left would be angry that they were forced to sneak around rather than get married. The House of Frank is like the House of Saud. They are equally financially corrupt.

8.) Women can be beaten in the movies. After all, the feminists cannot advance their agenda unless society is convinced that every white, conservative investment banker in the movies is busy sexually violating minority women in between drinking oil flavored martinis at lunch and chopping down trees for sport. After all, if both genders actually felt life was getting better between them, the feminists would have no power. They are the angry, white liberal versions of Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton. Exacerbating hostility between the genders allows these feminists to have something to do. Most women in Hollywood are liberals, but since Hollywood is about acting, the more liberal the woman on the screen, the more oppressed she is. Only in real life are liberal women protected.

2009 Update: Jesse Jackson threatened to do to Obama what Hillary threatens to do to Bill every night. So Jesse Jackson actually is an angry woman. Obama’s election was the emotional equivalent of a paddling to Jackson, who as of now has been knocked into irrelevance. May he take the equally irrelevant NOW with him.

I want to make it clear that I support women receiving equal pay for equal work. I also support women achieving full equality in society, because if the radical feminists ever do shut up, men and women will be better off. We will not have to listen to women comparing marriage to slavery while secretly praying for flowers and a wedding ring from a strong, smart Adonis who will turn them into paddle Queens.

It is very important that men do not try to physically or sexually abuse women who are politically liberal, the correct amount of attractiveness, or the wrong religion or ethnicity. For those who are still unclear which women are fair game and which women are off limits, Barbara Boxer’s office will be publishing a list of the women she has defended and ignored over the last three decades. The list will be available in Spanish, Braille, and Ebonics. Coincidentally, Ms. Boxer herself is the first woman in the protected column, meaning that conservative republican men should not even think about spanking her liberal hide.

The world now knows the 8 categories of acceptable abuse of womyn, one for each night of Hanukkah. May the men of this world enjoy this testosterone driven holiday, and as for the women of America, I suggest you join a protected group very soon.

Ok, off to find my tennis racket and go visit a certain republican Jewish brunette. Don’t worry sweetie, I will bring some ointment for you after I am done. You may object to this, but you do not have a say. The feminists will not defend you, since your beliefs justify my misogyny.

2009 Update: What is good for the goose is good for the gander golfer. Some golfer with a similar name to my blog cheated on his wife, and she beat the tar out of him with a golf club. Not since Brenda Ritchie beat up Lionel and his girlfriend has a problem been solves with such appropriate violence. The woman did not act like a crying feminist. She got tough, kicked the guy’s hide, and was done with it. Good for her.

As for me, I have no desire to hurt anyone, although I would not mind the radical feminists having their mouths ductaped while I am trying to watch football. They could voluntarily shut up until the commercials, but that has never happened.

The bottom line is either all women should get abused, or none of them should get abused. I prefer none of them get abused. I also prefer to live in a world where feminists actually stop promoting a liberal agenda, and start fighting for all women to be treated with respect. Men and women would both benefit from this.


Hanukkah Night 6–San Francisco Bound

Wednesday, December 16th, 2009

The Tygrrrr Express is off to the Belly of the Beast for the 6th night of Hanukkah.

Tonight I am speaking to the Marin County GOP near San Francisco. I am the undercard to California Republican Party Vice Chairman Tom Del Beccaro.

Yet no matter what the year, some things are universal. With that, I repeat prior sentiments regarding some important wars that were moral and just.

As Hanukkah enters its 6th night, I remind the entire world that again what is being celebrated is a military victory. The Maccabbees came, saw, and kicked rumpus. They did not negotiate, or dialogue, or sing kumbaya. They did not have pointless meetings. They did not take photo ops. They got the job done militarily, and were rewarded with the right to stay alive.

One of the reasons the Jews were able to win battles in the dead of night is because there were no print media at the time revealing secret troop movements. There were no anti-war movies. The ACLU did not exist, so the Maccabees could kill with impunity.

If we are all dead, then all the civil liberties in the world will not matter. This brings me to the greatest generation, those who fought the good war, the heroes of World War II.

First of all, we just had another anniversary of Pearl Harbor Day. December 7th, 1941, was the day that Franklin Delano Roosevelt correctly said would “live in infamy.” The soldiers of World War II saved the world. They defeated two threats that would have destroyed civilization and ended life as we had known it. When we see one of these fine people, we should say, “thank you and welcome home.”

Yet while the soldiers of WW II are beloved, and FDR is revered by many, what is less known is the set of steps that the government undertook during this war. For those who want to read a fantastic book, I recommend Tony Blankley’s brilliant work, “The West’s Last Chance.”

On pages 116 and 177, Mr. Blankley lists steps that were taken by the National Association of Broadcasters less than two weeks after Pearl Harbor.

“Do not broadcast personal observations on weather conditions. Watch sports broadcasts for this. A late night comment that ‘it’s a fine clear night” might be invaluable information to the enemy.”

“Do not broadcast any long list of casualties. This has been specifically forbidden.”

In February of 1942, the federal government offered more restrictions.

“Criticism of equipment, appearance, physical condition, or morale of the Armed Forces of the United States or any of its allies” is to be censored. Also outlawed is the “reporting of rumor or atrocity stories.”

Seventy newspapers were banned, and in a delicious irony, Father Charles Coughlins antisemitic newspaper “Social Justice” was banned. I say ironic because leftists Jews have claimed that the Torah (Old Testament) commands Jews to engage in social justice, which therefore commands them to be politically liberal and hate all things connected to republicans and conservatism. If only these bleeding hearts knew that Social Justice, aka their reason for existing, was an antisemitic paper. Then again, give how angst ridden and self hating many of these Jews are, I would not be surprised if they happily read this paper at the dinner table.

The bottom line is that in the same way that the Jewish community was tough, aka sensible, the federal government did what needed to be done to win wars and save all we hold dear. Leftists claim that George W. Bush is destroying their civil liberties, but what his administration has proposed is nowhere near as extreme as what FDR proposed and carried out. Yes, the very FDR that is lionized as a demigod by liberals everywhere actually cared about a muscular foreign policy.

That muscular foreign policy that was once bipartisan is now under assault from within. Reasonable minds can disagree on whether or not America should wage war under certain situations. What should never be in dispute is that deliberately trying to sabotage a war effort is wrong. It is beyond wrong. It is sedition.

It is wrong to give away secret troop movements. Anything that hampers America in terms of strategy should be the domain of our enemies. Arthur Sulzberger, the owner of the Jayson Blair Times, should have been arrested and thrown in jail the minute that story broke. The first amendment is not an absolute right. Mr. Sulzberger went to a crowded theatre located in the heart of where our enemies reside, and yelled to those enemies to fire at will on American soldiers.

It is wrong to insist on dialogue when agreements reached in previous dialogue sessions have been dishonored or broken. America could have crushed Muktada Al Sadr and put a pair bullets in his heart. Instead, on the verge of victory, we decided to negotiate with him. We were holding all the cards, and we bargained. He lived to wreak more havoc. We had a chance to destroy Fallujah, and instead we pulled back for talks. More Americans died. Only when we went into Fallujah again and destroyed everything, which by the way the main function of a successful military, did the problem get better.

Yet if the real battles are difficult, the public relations war has been a nightmare for anyone who loves the U.S. Military. During World War II, even when censorship was not in place, Hollywood voluntarily supported the troops through movies that supported the war effort. America and the Allies were the good guys, and the Axis were the bad guys. It was not shades of gray or other John Kerry type nuances. It was black and white, and the good guys won the war and saved civilization.

Nowadays, movies show America as the villain. Everybody else can be redeemed. Muslim terrorists are freedom fighters, while the real evil sociopaths beyond redemption are corporate executives, especially republican ones.

Where is the sense of honor? What about loyalty? What about love of a nation that enriches these people? Forget the legal freedoms that these parasites have. What about a moral sense of decency?

General David Petraeus said the surge was working, and that we were succeeding in Iraq. People who had never been to Iraq disagreed with him. These people have the right to feel this way. Free speech exists. Yet so does the Flat Earth Society.

ROTC is banned from college campuses, but terrorists such as Armageddonijad are welcomed under some concept of diversity, which apparently is extended to everybody except for those who defend American freedom.

Defending the right to exist with military force allows this existence t actually take place. When Judah Maccabee and his Israeli Brethren destroyed their enemies militarily, it started a tradition deeper than Hanukkah. It started the Jewish people’s fight for survival, one they have still not relinquished.

In World War II, villages were burned to the ground, homes were razed, and the body count was deep. Pearl Harbor was not a time for dialogue. It was a time for waging war, and even with a liberal president, waging war is exactly what we did. America and the world was significantly better off because of this.

Now we have the 9/11 generation and the War in Iraq. Islamofacists want to kill us all. Those that want to go on Oprah or Phil Donahue (thankfully canceled) and talk out our differences do not understand that the gap is not bridgeable. They want to kill us, we wish they would not do so. That does not leave much room for common ground.

From the Maccabees to Pearl Harbor, good was united against evil. I pray to Almighty God that those that truly believe that civilization and barbarism are equivalent will stop trying to get in the way of those who truly do wish to see civilization win. Some say that evil wins when good people do nothing. Evil wins when those who have the opportunity to support good are unable to tell the difference…or worse…know the difference, and refuse to care.

The Islamofacists are genocidal lunatics. They need to be rooted out with overwhelming brute military force. We won in Iraq, and now we need to win in Afghanistan. As Mr. Blankley reminds us, this is the West’s last chance. If we fail to support the military solution in Afghanistan again, there may be nobody left alive on our side to engage in dialogue.


Hanukkah Night 5–Los Angeles Bound

Tuesday, December 15th, 2009

The Tygrrrr Express is traversing Arizona back to Los Angeles. At 7am I am speaking to the Lake Havasu Republican Men at the Golden Corral. Yesterday I spoke to the Lake Havasu Republican women. At 11:30am I am still in Mojave County, speaking to the Colorado River Republican Women’s Federated in Bullhead City.

My evening speech to the Arizona Young Republicans in Phoenix has been rescheduled, so instead I get to drive back to Los Angeles for a few hours of sleep before my flight to San Francisco tomorrow.

No rest for the Tygrrrr Express, as 8 crazy nights in 8 cities reaches Hanukkah Night 5.

In 2009 Hanukkah news, as was the case when I originally wrote this, Iran is still nuts.

Although I am not an environmentalist, I am recycling Hanukkah columns for several reasons.  While some of my columns are badly written and lacking relevant time value, somehow my Hanukkah columns fail to meet that threshold. It could be because this one deals with Iran, and they are, were, and may always be nuts.

That brings the 2007 rehash with occasional 2009 updates.

As the wonderful holiday of Hanukkah entered its fifth night, Jewish people engaged in behavior that strict Islam forbids, that being drinking alcohol and gambling.
The Jewish religion is loaded with alcohol. We even have two drinking holidays, one in March and one in September. Sometimes we show solidarity with our Catholic brethren when the March one coincides with St. Patricks Day. Before delving into the consequences of alcohol, a happy Hanukkah story for you.

Two religious Jews in a synagogue could not find a Menorah with less than an hour before the first night of Hanukkah. Yes, I still remain incredulous that a synagogue would not have a Menorah laying around, but I witnessed this incident myself. These two very enterprising young men quickly between them drank 8 bottles of beer. A Menorah actually has holes for 9 candles, with one of them being higher than the other 8. Therefore, these two creative, but at this point inebriated men drank a bottle of what they referred to as “Rabbi Smirnoff.”

At this point these devoted, pious, and completely blitzed individuals did what any blasted individuals would do at this point…play with matches. By taking candles and lighting them, this created wax. The wax was used to fuse the bottles of beer and vodka together to form a makeshift Menorah. In a reversal on the story of Hanukkah, they had enough alcohol for 8 nights, but miracle of miracles, they drank it all on the first night.

I remember these two guys dancing on the table that night. While they were highly entertaining, the lesson I learned from that night is that for those who want to witness human stupidity, just add alcohol, mix, and wait.

It is in this spirit of overindulging on spirits that I bring up the issue of Iran. Liberals everywhere have just declared world peace, and I can only hope that they all came back from a drinking party at a Kennedy compound. Otherwise, an entire political party is engaging in mind boggling stupidity, reminding us again that, to quote rock group Spinal Tap, “The more it stays the same, the less it changes.”
In 2007 the National Intelligence Estimate stated that Iran stopped trying to pursue Nuclear Weapons in 2003. The implications are that Iran is no longer a dangerous threat to the world, President Bush knew about this, and he purposely and dastardly hid this information so that the Neocons could deliberately wage war with Iran.

Ok liberals, put down the peace pipes and stop smoking whatever illegal substance is inside them. Once again, the suicide of logical reasoning needs to be stopped before we invite Armageddonijad to Friday night synagogue services for jelly donuts, latkes (potato pancakes) and games of Dreidel.
The report is called the NIE, which stands for National Intelligence…what was that word again? Oh yeah…estimate. It is not called the NIC, or National Intelligence Certainty.

Why is it that reports of countries trying to kill America and blow up the world are considered sketchy, but that countries refusing to murder us are taken at face value, no questions asked?

Iraq was thought to have WMD. They were never found, leading many to think President Bush lied, or at worst was incompetent. I have maintained that Saddam did have WMD, he hid them in Syria, and even if there were no WMD, I never cared. The left said we were waging war over WMD because they desperately wanted to have it both ways, depending upon how the war went. We went to war to get rid of Saddam, and we were right.

Libya learned form the Iraq War. Iran did not. Khadafi decided to become normal. Armageddonijad went bonkers.

Saddam acted like he had WMD. Even if he was lying, who cares? If a group claims responsibility for a terrorist attack that they are innocent of just so they can burnish the Arab version of “Street Cred,” then they deserve to get blown to kingdom come.

Armageddonijad is acting like he is on the verge of nuclear weapons. It is he who is saber rattling, not George W. Bush.

Can the NIE be right? Yes. Does it matter? No. Should we blow up Iran anyway? Yes.

Yes, you all heard me correctly. I am advocating that either Iran immediately decides to knock it off, or they and Syria will be turned into 50,000 hole golf courses. They fund Hamas and Hezbollah. They control the world’s supply of oil. They think we are imperialist now? Let’s show them some real imperialism. The slogan can be “kick their @ss and take their gas.”

Jews live today to celebrate Hanukkah due to one thing and one thing only, and that is the appropriate use of overwhelming military force.

I say again that we should take an American flag and shove it up Armageddonijad’s hide until he goes to the toilet red, white and blue. Given his love for the Jewish people, we can hang the Israeli flag from his two tiny weapons of mass sexual dysfunction. In fact, in the same way we brought down Noriega with rock music, we can do the same with Armageddonijad. I recommend George Thorogood and the Destroyers singing, “Move over little dog, there’s a mean old dog moving in.” That big dog’s name is America.

Respected republican pollster Frank Luntz emphasized that the Israelis do not believe the NIE report, and while my heart bleeds American, Israeli intelligence is the best in the world. So before we start inviting Armageddonijad to go shopping with us at the holiday sales at Bloomingdales, let’s keep in mind that this fellow, despite being an honorary Poison Ivy Leaguer, is a terrorist.

He played a direct role in the taking of American hostages. Every one of those 444 days back in 1980 was connected to him. He funds worldwide terrorism.

One does not need to down bottles of Rabbi Smirnoff to understand that this guy is a lunatic who on the surface is not afraid to die. Ask, and he should receive.

The Greeks tried to kill us off, and today Jews celebrate Hanukkah. The Romans tried, and as impressive as their empire was, Israel at the least matches Italy. The Germans tried, and the third Reich lasted 12 years. The Arabs try every few years inbetween plotting to kill each other.

Thousands of years later, we will not back down from a madman that wants to wipe Israel off of the map. If he truly does not have WMD, then he can let in inspectors…or we can wait until planes fly into towers, at which point the Jayson Blair Times will blame the republican president for not “doing something to prevent this.”

2008 Update: As much as Obama will get credit for things that began before he took office and be absolved of blame for things that he can claim began before he took office, one thing even the Obamamessiah cannot duck is a potential attack on America. If we are attacked, people will all of a sudden remember that President Bush kept us safe. Even the Jayson Blair Times might reevaluate things, although the terrorists would most likely spare the JBT building. After all, it does not make sense to kill allies. Besides, I think they recruit there anyway, when not visiting their West Coast Campuses to find John Walker Lindh and his new friends in the Facebook Jihad Group.

2009 Update: The first gasbag in chief grades himself well for things he has failed to accomplish, because he loves him some him. The Iranians have clenched their fists even tighter.
We can try crippling sanctions until the country cracks, which would only hurt the Iranian people. North Korea is proof that this can fail. Or, we can repeal the law banning political assassinations, and take the madmen of Iran out. That includes every Mufti, Mullah, Ayatollah, Ayamufti, Muftitolah, and other multisyllabic hybrids that are merely Persian for the word “terrorists.”

Some will say that if we act this way, then they will. They already are, or did people not notice a British woman being threatened with death for a teddy bear named after the Prophet? Perhaps people forgot about Daniel Pearl and Theo Van Gogh.

2008 Update: Mumbai India…Arab Muslim Terrorists murdered Jews and peace loving Indians. Liberals responded by pointing out that they hate George W. Bush, and it was all his fault. Conservatives debated whether to drop their pro-life views so that liberals would have as many abortions as possible to prevent more future apologists.

2009: Sanctions remain useless. Liberals love to point to South Africa, but make no mistake about it. The world will fight for black people. They are a good minority. Jews are significantly less important. They are a bad minority. The world watched in 1945 as 6 million were murdered, and would happily do so again. Sanctions are a joke. If Iran threatened an African nation rather than a Jewish one then the world would stand up. Armageddonijad knows this.

Enough is enough. Iran is claiming they will soon have weapons. The NIE report to me is toilet paper. It can be used to clean up the Mullah’s palaces when they are eliminated.
At the very bare minimum, which is all I ever expect from the left anyway, let’s be calm about this NIE report. Armageddonijad is a serious problem. World peace did not break out today.
I want to celebrate Hanukkah next year with my fellow Jews. I also want to celebrate July 4th with my fellow Americans. This cannot be done if we are wiped off of the map. Just because some report by a flawed agency says that it will not happen tomorrow does not mean we should forget about the day after that.
Off to play Dreidel while listening to my favorite 1950s songs,”Yakkety Yak, Bomb Iraq,” by the Coasters, and “Bomb Iran,” by the Beach Boys.

2008 Update: It is one thing for a private citizen and blogger that gets ripped daily by some of his own readers to sing songs of blowing up infidels. It is another for Presidential candidate to do so.
I still think it’s funny, and I still think America should print as many offensive cartoons as possible. Some will say that will make us hated. Oh the horror…hateful savages that believe in violence may act like savages and resort to violence.

2009 update. Iran is getting nuclear weapons, and Obama is fine with this. Everything in life is George W. Bush’s fault, and heaven forbid we are attacked, Obama will find a way to successfully deflect blame. Israel will hopefully take out Iran, because Benjamin Netanyahu does nto take marching orders from some irrelevant academic with no real world grasp or skills about anything.

Besides, if we do shove the Israeli flag up Armageddonijad’s hide, we can then spin him around and see which way he lands. I think I just invented a new religious game.
Spin the Mullah! It’s time to serve up Latkes and play Armadreidelijad!


Hanukkah Night 4–Lake Havasu Miracle

Monday, December 14th, 2009

The third night of Hanukkah ended with a miracle.

The day had me driving from Sedona to Lake Havasu, Arizona. I began the day as a radio guest on the Elise Richmond Show out of Palm Springs. I explained the true meaning of Hanukkah, that being that the Jews took their enemies and militarily beat the daylights out of them.

Yesterday, after speaking to the Verde Valley Republican Women’s Federated in Sedona, I experienced a Hanukkah miracle. Unable to reach a Synagogue, I walked outside my hotel and saw 3 palm trees. Each one had blue lights around them. They looked like 3 giant Hanukkah candles. Ok, so it was less a miracle than a bizarre and pleasant coincidence, but religions declare every little thing a miracle, so this was a miracle. Anyway, I decided to bless these trees. If they die tomorrow, then we know that God still loves giving the Jews, or at least me, a hard time.

Or it means that another coincidence occurred. If these trees get chopped down by a Christian, I will declare the return of the crusades. Or it will be somebody trying to get a Christmas tree for their home. If an Islamist flies a plane into these trees, then it means that Islamists are now flying much smaller planes, which is dangerous to begin with. They are dangerous to land, but then again Islamists seem strangely unconcerned about this.

Apparently this Hanukkah miracle went way off track. I do not even like trees.

I did not talk to the tree. The tree did not talk back. I certainly did not hug the tree.

Nevertheless, it is nice to know that even in an area with very few Jews, at least the trees are Jewish.

Some may wonder why I am spending an entire blogging day talking about a tree with blue lights on it.

Again, should I waste my holiday talking about some golfer? The only thing more boring would be discussing members of Congress that will be taking time away from doing nothing to enjoy their own holidays.

Today I speak to the Lake Havasu Republican Women’s Federated.

In other news, nothing is happening. Islamists are still trying to kill us, and we are busy worrying about some fellow who takes time away from wearing ugly pants and hitting a ball with an oddly shaped stick to sleep with hot women simply because he can.

Folks, Jewish trees exist in Lake Havasu. I saw the blue lights myself.

May you all find your own miracles this holiday season, or at least some mundane coincidental occurrences that you can embellish with moderate rhetorical aplomb.


NFL 2009–Week 14 Recap

Sunday, December 13th, 2009

The Tygrrrr Express spent the second night of Hanukkah driving from San Diego to Sedona, Arizona. Today I speak to the Sedona Republican Women’s Federated before driving to Lake Havasu.

Normally this column would be entitled “Hanukkah Night 3,” but out of deference for the NFL, it is Week 14.

Before getting to football, driving from San Diego to Sedona was one of the reasons the lord (with help from the Snowman Jerry Reed, rest his soul,” wrote “Eastbound and Down,” for the movie “Smokey and the Bandit.”

“Put your foot hard on the pedal…son never mind them breaks. Let it all hang out cause we got a run to make.”

Another song you shall have stuck in your heads goes like this.

“Hanukkah, oh Hanukkah, come light the Menorah. Hanukkah oh Hanukkah, we’ll all dance the Horah. Gather round the table, will give you a treat. Lots of tasty chocolates and latkes to eat. Hanukkah oh Hanukkah, come light the Menorah…”

Yes, it is an endless loop, but again, I did have a 7 hour drive today. Sure Sirius Radio has Fox News, and more importantly the NFL Network, but those shows repeat. Luckily my singing voice is divine, especially when nobody else is around to hear it but the voices in me cranium.

Anyway, here are some words I say every year around this time.

At the beginning of the football season in September, all the teams have dreams. They are all like young pups, excited about the prize.

Yet this is December. The little puppies need to grow up. Some will and some will not.

So to quote football philosopher John Randall, “This is when the big dogs come out.”

Let’s play football. Here is the recap.

Pittsburgh Steelers @ Cleveland Browns was the Thursday night game. As awful as it was expected to be, it exceeded expectations and was worse. A pair of 29 yard field goals by Phil Dawson, one in the first and second quarters, had the Browns leading 6-0. It was not snowing. The teams were just pathetic on offense. Very late in the half Jennings ran it in from 10 yards out, barely making the pileon as the Browns had a stunning 13-0 lead. Reed got the Steelers on the board before the half with a 27 yard field goal to make it 13-3. Reed added a 42 yarder in the third quarter as the Steelers trailed by 7 points after three quarters.

Ben Roethlisberger was sacked 8 times in this game. He finished 18 for 32 for 201 yards, but was beat up all game. Brady Quinn was a wretched 6 for 19 for 90 yards. Yet Jennings made the difference, as the Steelers never reached the end zone. Pittsburgh had one last shot with 1:49 left, but went nowhere. The Browns had the shocking upset, while the defending champion Steelers lost their 5th straight after a 6-2 start. Mike Tomlin had no answers, as the Steelers will most likely not be making the playoffs. 13-6 Browns

New Orleans Saints @ Atlanta Falcons–With Matt Ryan injured, Chris Redman had to square off against Drew Brees. Redman did manage to move the Falcons early from the Atlanta 25 to the Saints 18, where a field goal had the Falcons up 3-0. Shockingly enough, the Saints did not panic. Brees brought the Saints back, reaching the Atlanta 15 before settling for the tying field goal. Redman brought the Falcons down the field again, but on 4th and 2 from the 12, Mike Smith opted for the field goal. In average, non-descript, white guy news, Mike Smith looks like a guy named Mike Smith. The field goal was good and the Falcons led 6-3.

In the second quarter Brees finally began unleashing, and a 42 yard gain to Robert Meacham led to a 6 yard touchdown pass to Reggie Bush to put the Saints in front 10-6. The Saints got the ball back, and Brees led a 13 play, 6 1/2 minute drive that ended with Brees hitting Marques Colston for a 3 yard touchdown pass as the Saints led 16-6. The extra point was no good, which would loom large later on. With only 51 seconds left and on their own 20, Redman quickly hit White for a 27 yard gain. With help from an unnecessary roughness penalty, The Falcons reached 3rd and 4 from the 8 with 8 seconds in the half. Redman fired incomplete, as the Falcons settled for another field goal and a 16-9 halftime deficit.

The Saints took the second half kickoff and Brees moved them 80 yards in 10 plays in 6 minutes. On 3rd and 1 from the 29, Bush picked up 19 yards. On 3rd and 10 from the Atlanta 40, Brees was intercepted, but pass interference nullified the pick and had New Orleans at the Falcons 12. Bush then fumbled on the next play, but the Saints recovered for a 9 yard loss. So the Saints went right back to Bush, who ran it in from 21 yards out as the Saints appeared cruising for an easy win at 23-9.

The game quickly changed when Redman hit Jenkins for a 50 yard touchdown pass to get the Falcons to within 23-16. When the Saints failed to covert 3rd and 1, the Falcons got the ball back. Redman led the Falcons 79 yards in 11 plays over 5 1/2 minutes. When Snelling ran it in from 4 yards out, the game was tied 23-23 with 13 minutes left in the game. The missed extra point was a potential game changer.

Brees then milked the clock with an exruciating 16 play, 8 minute drive from the New Orleans 17 to the Atlanta 10. An intentional grounding call pushed the Saints back 10 yards, but  Hartley, filling in for the benched John Carney, made up for his failed extra point with the go ahead 38 yard field goal with 4:42 to play. The Falcons then self destructed as a Wildcat snap lost 12 yards and Redman was then intercepted.

With 2:11 to play, the Saints faced 4th and 7 at the Atlanta 15. Sean Payton called for a fake field goal. Marc Brunelle fired incomplete, and the Falcons only needed a field goal to tie things. On 4th and 2 from the Saints 46 with 1:18 left, the Falcons were one good play from the attempt. It never came as Redman fired incomplete. For the second week in a row, the Saints had survived. At 13-0, they are not taking the foot off of the accelerator. 26-23 Saints.

Detroit Lions @ Baltimore Ravens–A Detroit team with nothing to play for and Matthew Stafford injured went on the road with Dane Culpepper against a Baltimore team fighting for its playoff life. For those who like inspiring upsets, this was not it. Culpepper was salty a couple of weeks earlier when he was told he would not be starting. Well today Culpepper had his chance, and the entire team made the least of it.

The Lions reached midfield but failed to convert on 2nd and 2 as well as 3rd and 2. The Ravens marched down the field but fumbled the ball away at the 6 yard line. The Lions moved again but failed to convert on 3rd and 1 from the Baltimore 26 before missing a field goal. After stopping the Ravens, Detroit failed to covert one yard on 2nd and 3rd down. Late in the opening quarter the Ravens did kick a field goal, and their 3-0 lead looked like a typical defensive slugfest. Reality then set in, and quite brutally.

In the second quarter, facing 3rd and 4 at the Baltimore 44, Culpepper fumbled the ball, and the Lions punted. Joe Flacco then hit Derrick Mason for a 62 yard touchdown to make it 10-0 Ravens. Culpepper brought the Lions back with a 15 play, 75 yard drive that ate up 7 1/2 minutes of clock. On 4th and goal at the 3 the Lions settled for a field goal, but with only 4 1/2 minutes left in the half the Lions were only down 10-3. They were making a game of it.

Then they remembered they were the Lions. Ray Rice ripped off a 59 yard touchdown run to put the Ravens up 17-3. Culpepper was then intercepted at midfield. Rice ran for 15 yards, followed by Flacco hitting Rice for a 30 yard gain down to the 5. The Ravens settled for a field goal and a 20-3 lead at halftime.

The Ravens took the second half at their own 26, and 11 plays and 6 minutes later, they had another score. Flacco hit Williams for 34 yards, and McClain took it in from 3 yards out to have the Ravens coasting at 27-3. The Ravens got the ball back, and Flacco hit Todd Heap for 31 yards to set up Willis McGahee from 8 yards out as the Ravens led 34-3. When McGahee ran it in from 19 yards out, the Ravens led 41-3, and the league considered canceling the 4th quarter before bowing to television contractural rules that only the league understands.

Culpepper showed his mettle in the fourth quarter by sneaking on 4th and 1 from his own 23. Like previous attempts, this failed. The Ravens took over, and Smith ran it in from 15 yards out. Baltimore improved to 7-6, while league owners met to discuss whether Detroit should be relocated to the Canadian Football League. 48-3 Ravens

Green Bay Packers @ Chicago Bears– Chicago is an injury riddled mess, while Green Bay has rebounded from a 4-4 start to win four straight. The game looked like the expected Green Bay blowout when RYan Grant ran for a 62 yard touchdown on Green Bay’s first play from scrimmage. The Packers got the ball back, and Aaron Rodgers moved them over 12 plays and 6 minutes. Mason Crosby nailed a 3 yard field goal to have the Packers up 10-0.

Jay Cutler completed a pass to Charles Woodson. Unfortunately for the Bears, Woodson still plays cornerback for the Packers. Starting at the Chicago 39, the Packers faced 4th and 3 at the 32. Mike McCarthy decided to go for it, and Rodgers picked up 9 yards. After 11 plays and 5 minutes, a 26 yard field goal in the second quarter had the Packers coasting at 13-0.

With 8 minutes left in the half Cutler finally got the Bears going with a 13 play, 6 1/2 minute drive. From the Chicago 20, the Bears moved backwards and then forwards. On 3rd and 18 from their own 35, Cutler hit Johnny Knox for 28 yards. On 3rd and 9 from the Green Bay 36, Cutler hit Aromashodu for 19 more. Finally on 3rd and 12 from the 19, Cutler hit Knox for the touchdown. Despite being dominated all game, the Bears only trailed 13-7 at the break.

2 minutes into the second half, Rodgers fumbled, and the Bears took over at their own 44. Cutler hit Knox for 22 yards and then to Aromashodu for the 10 yard touchdown as the Bears, with little offense, had a 14-13 lead handed to them. Yet the Bears would not accept the generosity. Early in the fourth quarter Cutler was intercepted, and the Packers took over at the Bears 11. Grant ran it in form 1 yard out, and the 2 point conversion had the Packers up by 7 with 12 1/2 minutes left in regulation.

Cutler led the Bears to the Green Bay 44, but several incomplete passes later, the Bears punted. The Bears got 2 more chances but went nowhere. The game was ugly, but the Packers won their 5th straight, as their 9-4 record puts them in strong playoff contention. 3 years after reaching the Super Bowl, the Bears may fire Lovie Smith, but he can’t make injured players play or their substitutes play like starters. 21-14 Packers

Seattle Seahawks @ Houston Texans–A pair of bad teams that have potential and fail to live up to it squared off. 16 seconds and one play from scrimmage were enough to end the suspense as Matt Schaub went deep to Andre Johnson for a 64 yard touchdown and a 7-0 Texans lead. Houston got the ball back, and despite failing to convert on 3rd and 2 from the Seattle 11, a field goal had the Texans up 10-0. The Texans got the ball back at their own 44, and on 3rd and  Schaub found Anderson for 27 yards. Ryan Moats ran it in from 4 yards out as the Texans led 17-0.

In the second quarter Schaub hit Johnson for a 17 yard touchdown as the Texans led 24-0. on the next drive Schaub took 6 1/2 minutes and 11 plays as the Texans moved from their own 3 to a 3rd and 2 at the Seattle 6. On the next play Schaub lost 2 yards, and the short field goal attempt was blocked. Had the Texans not been up by 4 scores this would have been inspiring.

Matt Hasselbeck finally got going from the Seattle 16. He hit Nate Burleson for 22 yards before Julius Jones ran for 24 more. Hasselbeck hit TJ Houshmanzadeh for 31 yards and then Carlson for the 4 yard touchdown. Seattle trailed 24-7 at the break. As for Schaub, he had 336 yards passing in the first half. Yes, in the first half. The team got bored in the second half as Schaub added only 29 more yards for a total of 365 on 29 for 39 passing.

Yet somehow Seattle did even less. Seattle is 4 years removed from the Super Bowl, and the Walrus, aka Mike Holmgren, may come back. Either way, the team is currently wretched, as was the second half. The Texans added a field goal. Schaub was intercepted, but Hasselbeck threw it right back to Pollard, who raced 70 yards for the interception touchdown to end the scoring. If Gary Kubiak is fired, it won’t be because of today. 34-7 Texans

Denver Broncos @ Indianapolis Colts–Denver has righted the ship after a midseason slump to get to 8-4, but traveling at the Colts has not been good to them in years past. This was three games all in one. The beginning of the game saw Peyton Manning put on a passing clinic. For some bizarre reason, despite winning the coin toss, Josh McDaniels decided to defer. Apparently he is not aware that Peyton Manning is really good.

Manning led the Colts 80 yards in 13 plays and 6 minutes, with a 5 yard score to Collie putting the Colts up 7-0. McDaniels asked if he could change his mind and take the ball first. He was told no. The Broncos punted, and the Colts took over at their own 44. Joseph Addai picked up gains of 12 and 8 yards on the ground and 25 more on a pass from Manning. Manning hit Dallas Clark for the 10 yard touchdown to make it 14-0 Colts.

The Broncos reached a 4th and 1 at the Indy 41, but Moreno was stuffed. In the second quarter Manning hit Clark for 22 yards, and later hit Clark for a one yard touchdown to complete an 11 play, 5 minute drive as the Colts led 21-0. The Colts were 38 minutes away from locking up home field, but they went to sleep way too early.

Kyle Orton led the Broncos 80 yards in 12 plays and 5 1/2 minutes. Three 3rd down conversions finished with a 5 yard touchdown to Brandon Marshall to make it 21-7. Late in the half Denver had 4th and 1 from the Indy 45, but again Moreno was stuffed. Manning was intercepted, and with 6 seconds left in the half, Denver had 3rd and 8 from the Indy 45. Rather than a Hail Mary or a 62 yard field goal attempt, Orton completed a 4 yard pass to Marshall. For those who hate the West Coast Offense like I do, the half ended 41 yards short of the goal line.

Even good teams can play bad football, and the third quarter was dreadful. Manning was intercepted two more times, while Orton was intercepted once, and Denver missed one field goal. Manning’s 3rd interception led to the Broncos making a field goal 10 seconds into the 4th quarter as they trailed 21-10. Denver hung tough, and a 5 yard touchdown pass from Orton to Marshall with 10 minutes left in the game had the Broncos within 21-16 as the 2 point conversion failed.

With a 21-0 lead all but evaporated, Manning simply took over as he has done so many times. On 3rd and 10 form the Indy 20, he hit Collie for 23 yards and then Reggie Wayne for 20 more. 80 yards, 14 plays, and 7 1.2 minutes bled the clock. Manning hit Clark for the one yard touchdown on 3rd and goal to give the Colts some breathing room with a 12 point lead with 2 1/2 minutes left.

At the 2 minute warning, facing 4th and 18 at their own 12, Orton completed a 7 yard pass to Brandon Marshall. The Broncos turned it over on downs to end their final threat, but the final reception broke an NFL record. Marshall caught 21 passes in this game, breaking the mark of 20 set by Terrell Owens in 2000. That game was the last one for Jerry Rice in San Francisco, so while Owens set the record, Rice was carried off the field. Marshall was not carried off the field as the Broncos lost the game.

Speaking of records, the Colts won their 22nd consecutive regular season game, breaking the mark of 21 set 2x by New England. Jim Caldwell has said that he is following the Tony Dungy tradition of resting everybody. The Colts have locked up home field throughout the playoffs, but the Colts are not interested in being the best team ever, just the best team of 2009. Keeping everyone healthy is expected to take precedence over chasing history, although Manning might quietly lobby hard to play. Denver is 2 games out in their division but in a strong position for a Wild Card birth. 28-16 Colts

Miami Dolphins @ Jacksonville Jaguars–A pair of teams desperate for a Wild Card berth slugged it out in a defensive bonelock. After an exchange of punts, Chad Henne led the Dolphins 67 yards on 13 plays and 7 minutes. The running game was key in this match, and Ricky Williams ran it in from one yard out to put the Dolphins up 7-0. In the second quarter Miami continued to pound it down the Jaguars throats, with a 74 yard, 13 play, 7 1/2 minute drive ending in a one yard Henne run as the Dolphins led 14-0.

The Jaguars came back with a lengthy drive of their own. David Garrard led the Jaguars 74 yards in 12 plays and 6 minutes. Maurice Jones-Drew banged through on 3rd and goal from the 1, as the Jaguars trailed 14-7 at intermission. In the second half Tony Sparano and Jack Del Rio saw their defenses dominate. If these were bad teams the game would have been unwatchable, but two good teams fighting for their playoff lives made for a great game.

In the third quarter Miami missed a field goal, and Jacksonville reached the Miami 8 before stalling. Jacksonville made their field goal to make it a 4 point game with 5 minutes left in the third quarter. Ricky Williams fumbled at the Jacksonville 29 at the end of the third quarter. With 8 minutes left the Jaguars failed to convert on 4th and 3 from the Miami 45. Henne was then quickly intercepted, but after picking up one first down, Jacksonville faced 4th and 10 at the Miami 39 with 6 1/2 minutes left. Del Rio decided to punt, pinning Miami at their own 14. Jacksonville got the ball back at their own 31 with 3 1/2 minutes left, but on 4th and 3 from the Miami 46, Garrard lost 4 yards with 1:20 left.

Jacksonville did get one last shot from their own 20 with 17 seconds left, but Garrard was sacked to end the scoreless fourth quarter and the game. Despite pitching a shutout in the seconds half, the Jacksonville defense got no help from the offense. The Miami defense was stout the whole game. Both of these teams are 7-6 and in playoff contention, with Miami in much better tie breaker position. This was playoff football early. 14-10 Dolphins

Buffalo Bills @ Kansas City Chiefs–A pair of awful teams played a game that some of their family members may have cared about. Matt Cassel was intercepted 4 times, although Buffalo provided little excitement on their end. Kansas City faced 4th and 11 at the Buffalo 35, and Todd Haley decided to punt. Yet Ryan Fitzpatrick was then sacked, fumbling the ball away to the Chiefs at the Buffalo 9. On 4th and goal from the 1, Haley decided to go for it. Even worse, he called for a pass play, and Cassel was sacked for a 7 yard loss. Shockingly enough, 0-0 was not the final score, although if fans left with 3 quarters remaining this would make sense.

From the 8, Marshawn Lynched ripped off a 47 yard gain. Fitzpatrick hit Terrell Owen for a 9 yard touchdown as the Bills led 7-0. Cassel led the Chiefs on a 13 play drive in the second quarter, but on 3rd and 3 from the Buffalo 5, Cassel completed  a 2 yard pass. Yes, the West Coast offense should be abolished. I am not sure why quarterbacks refuse to throw past the marker, praying instead that grown adults on defense fail to make a tackle. Mike Jones can explain this. On 4th and 1 from the 3, Haley, not wanting another debacle, kicked a field goal to get the Chiefs to within 7-3.

Buffalo fumbled at midfield, but on 3rd and 3 from the Buffalo 31, Cassel was sacked out of field goal range. From the 37, the Chiefs punted. If I forgot to mention it, these teams are awful. Buffalo came back, but on 4th and 2 from the Chiefs 24, Fitzpatrick completed a 1 yard pass. Again, the West Coast Offense should be abolished. Throw past the d@mn marker. A field goal made it 10-3 as 4th and 1 from the 23 seemed too difficult for either of these teams to convert.

The Bills began the second half by picking up only one yard on 3rd and 2, but at least it was a failed run instead of a failed pass. Cassel was then intercepted at his own 24, but on the 5 yard line Fitzpatrick threw it right back to the Chiefs. Again, these teams are awful. Fitzpatrick led an 11 play, 6 minute drive, but on 3rd and 4 from the Kansas City 6, the Bills shockingly failed to convert. At least this time it was an incomplete pass. A field goal made it 13-3 Bills.

In a game that was total garbage, one play was highlight worthy. Charles broke off a 76 yard touchdown run as the Chiefs got to within 13-10 only 1 play and 17 seconds after trailing by 10. The game then went back to being worthy of cancellation. The fourth quarter saw Cassel completing passes repeatedly to the Buffalo defense.

Cassel was intercepted at the Buffalo 35, his second pick of the game. That led to a Buffalo field goal and a 6 point Buffalo lead with 8 minutes left. Cassel then led a long drive that created a 4th and 10 at the Buffalo 21 with 2:20 to play. Cassel threw his 3rd interception. With one minute left, the Chiefs got the ball back at their own 27. With 7 seconds left, from the Buffalo 37, Cassel threw the Hail Mary. Despite neither team deserving to win, the game did not feature a miracle touchdown, missed extra point, and pointless overtime. The ball was intercepted. 16-10 Bills

Cincinnati Bengals @ Minnesota Vikings–Both of these teams came in trying to move closer to the # 2 seed in their respective conferences and a 1st round bye. After a scoreless opening quarter, Ryan Longwell nailed a 41 yard field goal to get the Vikings on the board first 3-0. A short Cincinnati punt had the Vikings staring their next drive at the Cincy 43. Brett Favre hit Adrian Peterson for 28 yards, and on 3rd and 8 from the 9, Favre hit Sidney Rice for the touchdown as the Vikings led 10-0. Carson Palmer hit Chad Johnson for a 15 yard touchdown to get the Bengals within 10-7. Despite not being fined after the play, Johnson could not motivate the Bengals to do much more the entire game.

Favre quickly led a 14 play drive near the end of the half, although it stalled at the 5 yard line. A short field goal had the Vikings up 13-7 with 35 seconds left in the half. With 13 seconds left, a short pass was fumbled, and the Vikings recovered at the Cincy 26 with 4 seconds left. The gift turnover led to another field goal and a 16-7 Vikings lead that seemed to deflate the Bengals.

Cincinnati lost even further momentum when the second half kickoff went out of bounds. From their own 40, Favre made critical 3rd down conversions. On 3rd and 5 from the Minnesota 45, Favre hit Chester Taylor for 6 yards. On 3rd and 17 from the Minnesota 44, Cincinnati jumped offsides. On 3rd and 12, Favre hit Taylor for 26 yards. Taylor picked up 17 yards, and Peterson ran it in on 3rd and goal fro the one to have the Vikings leading 23-7.

Early in the fourth quarter the Bengals faced 4th and goal from the Minnesota 4. Marvin Lewis opted for the field goal to make it 23-10. Yet the Benglas could not stop the Vikings offense. Favre moved the Vikings 67 yards in 11 plays and 6 minutes, with Peterson carrying it the final 3 yards to complete the scoring.

The Vikings won by the exact same score they lost by last week, as the Vikings moved to 11-2. The Bengals fell to 9-4, leading their division but now one game behind San Diego for the first round bye. Brad Childress is Catholic and bald. 30-10 Vikings

Carolina Panthers @ New England Patriots–The Panthers have had a nightmarish season, while the Hoodie, aka Bill Bellichick, is trying to delay the collapse of the evil empire of football in New England. The Panthers had Matt Moore starting in place of injured Jake Delhomme. Yet despite leading the division by only one game, the Patriots have been accused of playing unenthused, while the Panthers have been scratching and clawing for Jon Fox.

On 4th and 1 from the Carolina 40, Bellichick naturally decided to go for it, and Sammy Morris got stoned for no gain. Later on again from the Carolina 40, New England faced 4th and 3, and Bellichick opted to punt. After Tom Brady was intercepted at his own 48, Matt Moore went deep to Steve Smith for a 41 yard touchdown and a 7-0 Panthers lead.

In the second quarter, Randy Moss caught his only pass of the day and fumbled the ball away. With 3 1/2 minutes left in the half, John Kasay missed a 53 yard field goal. Despite being lifeless on offense the entire half, the Patriots benefitted from a 30 yard defensive pass interference penalty to the Carolina 21. Kevin Faulk ran it in from 3 yards out as the teams were deadlocked 7-7. On the last play of the half, from the Carolina 44, Moore hit Muhsin Muhammad at the New England 40. Muhammad then did the hook and lateral to Steve Smith, who was pushed out of bounds at the Patriots 12. Exciting, but no points out of it.

In the third quarter the Patriots missed a golden opportunity when they fumbled the ball away at the Carolina 15. Yet midway through the quarter they got the ball back at their own 4. Brady led the Patriots 96 yards in 13 plays and 7 1/2 minutes. On 3rd and 2 from the Patriots 12, Brady hit Wes Welker for 13 yards. A 23 yard pass to Welker led to 3rd and goal at the 5, where Brady hit Watson for the go ahead touchdown as New England led 14-7 entering the final quarter.

Moore brought the Panthers into the red zone, but with 12 minutes left in regulation the Panthers settled for a field goal and a 14-10 game. Brady brought the Patriots back, and with 7:20 to play, a Patriots field goal had them back up by a touchdown at 17-10. The Panthers then punted, and taking over at the Carolina 42, the Patriots turned out the lights. Stephen Gostkowski nailed a 47 yard field goal to put the game out of reach. New England was not anywhere near their best, but at 8-5 they lead their division by one game. 20-10 Patriots

New York Jets @ Tampa Bay Buccaneers–The Jets at 6-6 came in fighting for their playoff lives without quarterback Mark Sanchez. Kelly Clemens started in place of the injured rookie. As for the Buccaneers, Raheem Morris is in charge, Jon Gruden is still in the Monday Night Football Booth, and Monte Kiffin is back in college with his son. Clemes was unspectacular, with only 111 yards passing. He looked like a Hall of Famer compared to Josh Freeman, who threw for 93 yards and 3 interceptions.

The first interception came on the first play from scrimmage. STarting at the Tampa Bay 31, the Jets faced 4th and 1 from the 22. Rex Ryan opted for the field goal, as the Jets led 3-0. After a Tampa Bay punt, Clemes led a 14 play, 6 1/2 minute drive that stalled at the Tampa Bay 6 yard line. Another field goal had the Jets up 6-0. Given the pathetic Buccaneers offense, that seemed to be enough of a lead, although the Jets decided to add more. A third field goal midway through the second quarter had the Jets up 9-0 in a game that was less exciting than it sounded.

A 33 yard touchdown run by Thomas Jones had the Jets up 16-0. Just before the half, Jay Feely added a 4th field goal, as his 49 yarder made it 19-0. For some unknown reason, the league refused to cancel the second half. Down 19-0, the Bucs moved 11 plays over 6 minutes, and decided that a field goal of their own would light up the home crowd. They trailed 19-3, and it did not. A surprise onsides kick worked, but on 4th and 2 from midfield, the Bucs punted. Despite briefly waking up, the fans went back to sleep.

In the fourth quarter Freeman was intercepted by Darrell Revis, who returned it 54 yards to the Tampa 7. Thomas Jones tan it in one play later to mercifully end this game. Teams often try to reach back to their glorious past, but the Bucs this year are one win away from channeling 1976. At 7-6 with a 3 game win streak, the Jets are in the playoff hunt, and are one game back in their division. 26-3 Jets

St. Louis Rams @ Tennessee Titans–10 years ago the Greatest Show on Turf survived when Mike Jones made the tackle that won the Super Bowl. 10 years later these teams began the year as the worst of the worst. The Rams are still in the gutter with one win, while the Titans have gone from an 0-6 disaster to a 5-7 team whose only loss was on the road to unbeaten Indy. This season is another reason why Jeff Fisher is as good as it gets. As for this game, especially for the Rams, it was as bad as it gets. Marc Bulger and Kyle Boller were both injured, as a 3rd string quarterback had to face the Buddy Ryan 46 defense Fisher employs.

Chris Johnson ripped off a 39 yard run to put the Titans up 7-0. On the next series Vince Young hit Johnson for a 66 yard touchdown pass as the Titans led 14-0 ina  game that was never competitive. The second quarter saw Vince Young go down with a knee injury. He did not return. Kerry Collins came in, and the rout continued. The period belonged to Rob Bironas, as he nailed 3 field goals to have the Titans up 23-0 at halftime.

A 4th Bironas field goal had Tennessee up 26-0 in the third quarter. By the time Chris Johnson ran it in from 3 yards out, the game was a laugher at 33-0. The Rams finally scored when a fake punt went for 51 yards to set up a touchdown pass. Ironically, the 3rd string quarterback of the Rams is named Null, which is what the team had for points most of the game. Null is the same as nil for those who watch that other boring game futbol. Anyway, Null nullified the null with the score to make it 33-7. Null then led a miracle comeback and a 35-33 Rams win.

No, not really. In the fourth quarter, facing 4th and goal at the one, Fisher decided to go for it. Kerry Collins hit Alge Crumpler for the score. Null then had a pass intercepted by Gibson for a 45 yard touchdown. So since Null had one touchdown pass to each team, his net results really were null. The Titans got to 6-7 and are mathematically alive. Despite being led by Null, the Rams do have one win, although Null has nil as a starter. 47-7 Titans

Washington Redskins @ Oakland Raiders–For more on the game of the day, go to

Both of these teams have sub-par records, but are showing signs of improvement. The Raiders came in winning two straight, while the Redskins outplayed unbeaten New Orleans before losing. Kicker Suisham was kicked off the team for his 23 yard shank. Jason Campbell has shown much improvement at quarterback, while Bruce Gradkowski sparked the Silver and Black with a heroic performance last week. Tom Cable and Jim Zorn can both say that their teams have not quit.

Both teams punted on their first 2 possessions, but Gradkowski then moved the Raiders with one big play, a pass to Darren McFadden that went for 48 yards to the Washington 23. On 4th and 7, the Redskins jumped offsides, but on 4th and 2 from the 15, Cable stuck with the field goal. Sebastian Janikowski made the kick as the Raiders led 3-0.

Campbell brought the Redskins back. On 3rd and 1 from their own 32, Campbell threw a short pass to Ganther that went for 42 yards. On 3rd and 8 form the Oakland 19, Campbell scrambled for 13 yards. Campbell then hit Fred Davis for the 6 yard touchdown to put the Redskins up 7-3.

A 41 yard kickoff return had the Raiders starting their first drive of the second quarter at midfield. Gradkowski hit McFadden for a 26 yard gain to the Washington 24. On 3rd and 10 Gradkowski hit Chaz Schillens for 15 yards. On 3rd and goal from the 11 Gradkowski hit Zach Miller to set up 4th and goal at the one. Cable decided to go for it, and Justin Fargas ran it in to put the Raiders up 10-7.

Campbell again brought the Redskins back, although on 4th and 1 from the Oakland 28, it was Jim Zorn that decided not to gamble. New kicker Gano made the 46 yard field goal as the game was tied 10-10. The Raiders took over on their own 12, but on 3rd and 1 from the 21, this time Fargas went nowhere and the Raiders punted.

With 4 minutes left the Raiders got the ball back on their own 40, but got no further than midfield. Shane Lechler did his job, and the punt appeared to have the Redskins at their own 10. Yet a penalty on Eugene for interfering with a fair catch was compounded by an unsportsmanlike conduct penalty on the Raiders. 30 yards in penalties had the Redskins starting at their own 40, and Campbell made them pay. He hit Santana Moss for 14 yards, Devin Thomas for 29 more, and Fred Davis for the 17 yard touchdown as the Redskins led 17-10.

The Raiders took over at their own 14 with only 56 seconds left in the half, and on 3rd and 10 Gradkowski scrambled for the first down. A 16 yard toss to Johnny Lee Higgins helped set up a dramatic end to the half.

On the last play of the half, Tom Cable brought in Seabass to try a 66 yard field goal. Seabass is the Polish Cannon, and he actually once on the last play of a half was brought in to try a 76 yarder. It may seem ludicrous, but he only needs to make it once to be the record holder. He had a 64 yard attempt hit the upright in one game. As for this kick, it may have been good from 60, but not 66. The risk on this play is either a block or a return. Fred Smoot took it 4 yards deep in the end zone, and after a brief scare 64 yards later, he was tackled at the Oakland 40, to end the half on an exciting note despite no points coming out of it.

The Raiders were only down 17-10, and after a Washington punt, the Raiders were brimming with optimism. Then something horrible transpired. Gradkowski apparently was injured, and some 41 million dollar bust who was benched 3 weeks ago retook the field. JaMarcus Russell wears jersey # 2, which is how he plays. I will stop saying this when this changes. Russell said on the radio that Gradkowski was doing well because the offense was making plays. Russell still has not accepted the fact that he was benched because he was the main problem. He had a chance at redemption on this day.

The Raiders started out on their own 44. On 3rd and 3 from the Washington 38, Russell hit Higgins for 10 yards. In field goal range, Russell was sacked for a 9 yard loss. Cable decided to have Seabass try a 54 yard field goal, which for him is a chip shot. He nailed it, and the Raiders were within 17-13.

On the next drive the Raiders began just shy of midfield. The Raiders reached a 1st and 10 at the Washington 28, in excellent position to tighten the game and even take the lead. Then a mindboggling series of events occurred. Russell was sacked for a 6 yard loss to make 2nd and 16. A  false start made 2nd and 21. An ineligible man downfield made it 2nd and 26. A 9 yard sack of Russell, who still has no pocket presence, set up 3rd and 35 at the Oakland 47. Russell threw 13 yards to Miller,  but the completion was challenged and reversed. On 4th and 35, the Raiders punted.

The fourth quarter showed what a true leader Russell is. First Campbell led a 13 play, 6 minute drive that ended with Ganther running it in from one yard out to put the Redskins up 24-13. Russell needed one play to throw an interception, as the Redskins took over at the Oakland 41. Campbell hit Moss for 30 yards to set up Ganther from one yard out to make it 31-13 Redskins. That is JaMarcus Russell.

The Raiders took over at their own 20. Russell was sacked and fumbled, setting up 2nd and 27 at their own 3. This is JaMarcus Russell. On 4th and 14 form their own 16, the Raiders punted. Washington fumbled the punt, and the Raiders took over at midfield. Russell was then sacked for a 9 yard loss. This is JaMarcus Russell. On 4th and 14 Russell was sacked again.

The Redskins added a field goal, but this game was about the Raiders at quarterback. The Raiders were down 17-10 when Gradkowki went down, and 17-13 after 3. JaMarucs Russell came in and the team collapsed. It was mostly his fault. He is simply a terrible quarterback. Gradkowski needs to get healthy very quickly. 34-13 Redskins

San Diego Chargers @ Dallas Cowboys–Chargers Coac Norvelous Norv Turner used to be the offensive coordinator for Dallas when they were winning Super Bowls. Cowboys Coach Wade Phillips used to be the defensive coordinator for the Chargers. Phillips is under fire as his team battles against the perception that they are jinxed in December. Turner is awful in September, but he is refusing to join other overrated coaches on the unemployment line. His team is loaded with talent, and I will have to eat my words about Turner if this team does anything in the playoffs.

A 10 play, 6 1/2 minute drive led to a 31 yard Nick Folk field goal and a 3-0 Cowboys lead. Yet Philip Rivers answered Tony Romo. On 3rd and 12 from their own 14, Rivers hit Floyd for 24 yards. Rivers then hit Wilson for 21 yards out. A defensive pass interference call on a gadget play set up a one yard touchdown run by Ladanian Tomlinson as the Chargers led 7-3.

In the second quarter, facing 4th and 1 at the Dallas 31, Rivers snuck for the 1st down. On 3rd and 6 from the 26, Rivers hit Floyd for 7 yards. Yet on 3rd and 3 from the 12, Rivers threw a one yard West Coast pass. On 4th and 2 from the 11, the field goal had San Diego up 10-3.

Romo then led a 72 yard drive that took 8 minutes. Unfortunately from Dallas, they needed to go 73 yards to score. Marion Barber needed one yard on 2nd, 3rd, and 4th and goal. 3 times he got stuffed, as the goal line stand loomed large.

Midway through the third quarter the Cowboys were pinned at their own one yard line. Barber picked up 10 yards and Felix Jones picked up 10 more. Romo hit Miles Austin for 21 yards, and Roy Williams for 25 more. Again from the San Diego one yard line the Cowboys had trouble, but after a false start, Romo hit Austin for the 6 yard touchdown to tie the game 10-10. The 11 play, 7 1/2 minute drive left the teams deadlocked entering the last quarter.

A scary moment happened when Ware was injured with a sprained neck. He was carted off in a stretcher, but later that night was released from the hospital. Shortly after play resumed, the Chargers faced 3rd and 12 at their own 47. Rivers hit Vincent Jackson for 39 yards, and then tossed the 14 yard touchdown pass to Antonio Gates as the Chargers led 17-10 with 11 minutes left in regulation.

Romo found Jason Witten for 26 yards, but after that the Cowboys punted. With 9 minutes left, the Chargers took over at their own 11. 3 Tomlinson runs moved the ball to the 25, and Rivers then hit Jackson for 21 yards. Darren Sproles and Tomlinson just ground out yardage, and ground down the clock. After 15 plays and 7 minutes, a field goal with 1:56 left locked up the game. The Cowboys did score a garbage touchdown with 2 seconds remaining, and then failed to recover the onsides kick.

Despite being 8-5, Jerry Jones seems to be on the verge of replacing his entire team. The Cowboys are having a nightmarish December, but not as nightmarish as the questions about Phillips and Romo. Dallas fell one game out of the division lead, while San Diego took a 2 game lead in their division and a one game lead in the race for the # 2 seed and the first round bye. The Chargers have won 8 straight, and 16 straight in December. 20-17 Chargers

Philadelphia Eagles @ New York Giants was the Sunday night game. This game was ridiculous. It was also the game of the year in terms of big plays as these teams took their pinball machines to tilt level. The Eagles have had the psychological edge over the Giants lately. Last year the Giants were the defending Champions, and cruising to another title when the Eagles came into New York and stunned them.Philly simply beat the hell out of them on both sides of the ball, building a 20-7 lead and winning 20-14 in a game that was not that close. Although the Eagles finished 9-7 and the Giants, 13-3, the playoff rematch in New York was more of the same, a complete reversal of 2007 when the upstart Giants knocked off favored Dallas. Again the Eagles romped big on the road. This year in Philadelphia the Eagles put up 40 points and throttled the Giants.

In this game, Donovan McNabb passed for 275 yards on 17 of 26 passing with 2 touchdowns and one interception. Eli Manning was a sensational 27 of 28 for 391 yards and 3 touchdowns. Yet for the third straight time it looked like a Philly road win, at least early on. This was a game of many big plays.

Although McNabb was the quarterback, it was a 32 yard pass from Michael Vick to Desheard Jackson that set up an 8 yard touchdown pass from McNabb to Captain Morgan Brent Celek as the Eagles quickly led 7-0. Brandon Jacobs then fumbled the ball, and Brown returned it 60 yards for a score to have the Eagles up 14-0 barely more than 5 minutes into the game. It looked like a 4th straight blowout 3 of them in New York. Manning coolly then led the Giants 15 plays over 7 minutes from the Giants 15 to the Philly 8 but the drive then bogged down. A field goal had the Giants within 14-3.

In the second quarter, after an Eagles punt, Manning went deep to Hakeem Nicks for a 68 yard touchdown pass to get the Giants within 14-10. From the Eagles 23, McNabb led them over 12 plays and 6 1/2 minutes to the Giants 2 yard line, but after one failed run, Andy Reid did what he always does in short yardage situations, try to throw it. He is an excellent coach but this one area is a nightmare for the Eagles. Incomplete passes led to a 20 yard David Akers field goal and a 17-10 Eagles lead. The Giants punted, and Deshean Jackson returned it 72 yards for another big play touchdown as the Eagles led 24-10.

4 minutes remained in the half, and from the New York 33, Ahmad Bradshaw ripped off gains of 16 and 17 yards. Manning hit Steve Smith for 19 yards, and Bradshaw carried the final 3 yards to get the Giants to within 24-17 with 90 seconds left in the half. This was way too much time for McNabb. On 3rd and 20 from the Philly 32, he hit Jackson for 44 yards. On 3rd an d10 form the New York 24, McNabb found Celek for  23 yards down to the one. Vick came in at quarterback and ran it around the end past the pileon with 10 seconds left in the half. Surprisingly enough, David Akers had his extra point attempt blocked. Nevertheless, the Eagles led 30-17. The Giants then fumbled the squib kick and the Eagles recovered in field goal range. However, despite Any Reid pleading that a couple seconds remained, the officials ruled that the half was over.

The Giants were lucky to not be down more, and Manning took the second half kickoff as the Giants began at their own 26. 11 plays and 6 minutes led the Giants to 1st and goal at the Philadelphia 2. An incomplete passes and a pair of Jacobs runs failed to reach the end zone, and on 4th and goal from the one, Tom Coughlin decided to go for it. Jacobs finally banged it in, and the Giants were within 30-24.

Despite the offenses ruling much of this game, McNabb was then intercepted, and Manning fumbled it right back. After an Eagles punt, Manning went deep, and the game of big plays had another one as Dominic Hixon caught the 61 yard touchdown pass as the Giants had come all the way back to lead 31-30 thanks to the blocked extra point. The Eagles needed only one play and 15 seconds to respond, as McNabb went deep to Jackson for a 60 yard touchdown and 37-31 Eagles lead.

The pace of the game finally slowed a bit, and with 13 minutes left in regulation the Eagles started at their own 9 yard line. A game of quick strikes featured a time consuming drive when it mattered most. McNabb hit Jackson for 20 yards. Leonard Weaver picked up 10 on the ground.  From the Giants 25, McNabb hit Leonard McCoy for 19 yards. Vick came in and ran it to the one. McNabb came back in, and handed it to Weaver for the one yard touchdown as the Eagles were again back up by 14 at 45-31 after making the 2 point conversion. 12 plays and 7 1/2 minutes left the Giants with 6 minutes to come back.

The Giants took over at their own 25. From the New York 38, Manning hit Bradshaw for a 31 yard gain to the Philadelphia 31. On 4th and 4 from the Philly 25, Manning hit Mario Manningham for 7 yards. On 3rd and 11 from the 19, an incomplete pass was nullified when the Eagles jumped offsides. On 3rd and 6 from the 14, Manning his Smith for 10 yards and then Kevin Boss for the 4 yard touchdown. The Giants were within 7 points within 90 seconds remaining.

The onsides kick failed, and although the Giants held, a perfect punt forced the Giants to start at their own 5 with 28 seconds left. Manning was sacked and fumbled, and the Eagles had won a thriller. Again they had beaten the Giants on the road. Had the Giants won their would have been 3 teams in the division at 8-5 with the Giants owning the tiebreaker. Instead, the Eagles are 9-4, Dallas 8-5, and the Giants fighting for their lives at 7-6. McNabb is known for laughing and celebrating on the sidelines, but in this game it was Andy Reid jumping in the air and body bumping one of his players that provided the amusement. 45-31 Eagles

Arizona Cardinals @ San Francisco 49ers was the Monday night game. The Cardinals had a big win last week at Minnesota, and playing on the road against a below average San Francisco team on the road had the potential to be a trap game. The Cardinals stumbled down the stretch last year, and this year they had another chance to clinch the division fairly early. All the Cardinals did was turn the ball over 8 times in a dreadful effort by a 49ers team that was good enough to win at home.

Alex Smith was intercepted early on, but the Cardinals failed to capitalize. With 4 1/2 minutes left in the opening quarter, the Cardinals took over at their own 6. Tim Hightower quickly fumbled the ball away. Smith then hit Vernon Davis for a 5 yard touchdown to give the 49ers the 7-0 lead. The Cardinals fumbled again, and the 49ers took over at the Arizona 28. On 4th and 2 form the 20 Mike Singletary decided not to gamble. Joe Nedney nailed the 37 yard kick to put the 49ers up 10-0 with no offense.

In the second quarter the Cardinals reached the San Francisco 18, but Kurt Warner was then intercepted to kill the drive. The closest the 49ers came to an actual drive was a missed 53 yard field goal by Nedney. Yet despite golden field position, On 3rd and 6 from the San Francisco 38, Warner was intercepted again. Despite 5 turnovers, the Cardinals were only down 10-0. However, with just under one minute left in the half, Smith found Michael Crabtree for a 35 yard touchdown and a 17-0 49ers lead. The Cardinals took over at their own 42, and had time for a Hail Mary attempt at the San Francisco 41. Warner was sacked and fumbled for the 6th Arizona turnover before intermission.

The Cardinals finally stopped giving the ball away in the second half, moving to a 3rd and 1 at the San Francisco 36. Wells lost 2 yards and the Cardinals punted. The Cardinals got the ball back at their own 45, and a Neil Rackers field goal from 48 yards out finally got Arizona on the board as they trailed 17-3. Smith was then intercepted again as the Cardinals took over at the San Francisco 43. On 3rd and 1 from the 34, Warner hit Wells for 24 yards. On 4th and goal from the one, Ken Whisenhunt decided to go for it less than one minute into the fourth quarter. AFter being stopped cold, a great second effort by Wells barely got the ball over the goal line. The extra point was blocked, and the Cardinals trailed 17-9.

The 49ers punted, and with 12 minutes left in the game, the Cardinals had a chance to tie the game from their own 11. Wells then fumbled it away again and the 49ers took over at the Arizona 16. Frank Gore ran it in from 2 yards out to complete the scoring. Warner fumbled the ball away late for the 8th and final turnover. The 49es were unimpressive, but the Cardinals were awful, giving away all 24 points on turnovers deep in their own territory. The 49ers did not move the ball much, but they did not need to. Arizona gave the game away, but still lead the division comfortably. For the second straight year, that seems to be the problem. 24-9 49ers


Hanukkah Night 2–Sedona Bound

Saturday, December 12th, 2009

After speaking today to the San Diego County Republican Women’s Federated, the Tygrrrr Express has to make the way to Sedona, Arizona. Somewhere between the two may be a hotel in Yuma, but who knows. Life is about adventure.

Without mentioning names, I attended a Jewish social event. I have commented on this before, but if Rabbis want Jewish singles to meet each other, putting them in a room is not enough. They have to shut up long enough to let them have a conversation.

I am sure other religions have the same problem, but Rabbis love the sound of their own voices.

Half of all Jewish women age 34 are childless. Rabbis have no idea why. Part of it is because if the Rabbi keeps babbling and orders others to be quiet, they cannot interact. At least the Rabbi last night was not bemoaning why Jewish people marry outside the faith. Why should he care? He has his wife and kids.

We just want a few minutes of silence!

I would tell the Rabbi this, but that would remind him of a story once told to him passed down from generations.

Anyway, I have to hit the road.


Pittsburgh Steelers @ Cleveland Browns was the Thursday night game.

(Steelers by 10, they win but fail to cover)

New Orleans Saints @ Atlanta Falcons

(Saints by 9 1/2, they win but fail to cover)

Detroit Lions @ Baltimore Ravens

(Ravens by 13 1/2, they win but fail to cover)

Green Bay Packers @ Chicago Bears

Seattle Seahawks @ Houston Texans

(Texans by 6, they win but fail to cover)

Denver Broncos @ Indianapolis Colts

(Colts by 7, they win but fail to cover)

Miami Dolphins @ Jacksonville Jaguars

(Jaguars by 2 1/2, upset special, Dolphins win outright)

Buffalo Bills @ Kansas City Chiefs

(Bills by 2, upset special, Chiefs win outright)

Cincinnati Bengals @ Minnesota Vikings

Carolina Panthers @ New England Patriots

New York Jets @ Tampa Bay Buccaneers

(Jets by 3 1/2, they cover)

St Louis Rams @ Tennessee Titans

(Titans by 13, they win but fail to cover)

Washington Redskins @ Oakland Raiders

(Redskins by 1, upset special, Raiders win outright)

San Diego Chargers @ Dallas Cowboys

(Cowboys by 3, they cover)

Philadelphia Eagles @ New York Giants is the Sunday night game.

(Giants by 1, they cover)

Arizona Cardinals @ San Francisco 49ers is the Monday night game.

(Cardinals by 3, upset special, 49ers win outright)